October 27, 2009 · 10:29 pm

Jesus sells

Back in February I posted about Jesus Toast tattoos with a poll asking if people found this disrespectful, evangelical, Kinda Cool or other. Kind Cool won out at 61%. I am beginning to wonder if humor in religion is acceptable, or just amongst my readers. Never wanting to offend (ok, maybe that is a stretch) please take this post with a grain of salt.

These 2 photos were sent to me by a friend/reader who considers herself MFTA by proxy. She has also brought me the magnificent Butt Paste shot.

I love this first one:

jesus-shaves

This Jesus Shaves mug is heat activated. Pour in hot water and his beard disappears. These types of mugs have been around the ad specialty world for awhile. This is, by far, the best application I have seen. If you would like to purchase it you can do so here (no affiliation, just love the product).

While checking out a place to buy this I found Jeez-its on the same site. This one killed me as we had a crazy conversation one night at a birthday celebration about Cheez-Its vs. Jesus. This would have made a great party favor.

Next item is also quite wonderful.

ww-jesus-wear

What Would Jesus Wear magnetic wardrobe. Oh my, I would love to dress him in the tie dye number! You can buy this item here.(again, no affiliation)

Now, here I might be treading on being a little disrespectful, but hey, I am just a documenting. I took this shot in the LIC subway station. Quite the message!

ww-jesus-do

I will end this ridiculous post with a message I received awhile back on twitter. I wrote about it before but the screen shot is priceless, albeit a touch creepy. Nonetheless, it is a perfect sign-off.

jesus-tweet

Haven’t had enough of me yet? You can also read me at 50-Something Moms Blog. For photo enthusiasts, visit Leaving the zip code, photos from outside the comfort zone.

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October 26, 2009 · 11:30 pm

Time to Cry Tuesday – And in the end…

… the love you take is, is equal to the love you make.* – Lennon/McCartney

I heard this today. For perhaps the 1,000th time in my life and yet in the context that it was quoted I had never heard it quite so clearly.

In our busy lives we often forget what is really important. We jump from task to task, place to place, moment to moment without stepping back to just ‘be’. And part of ‘being’ is to make sure that we nurture the people in our lives that need it most.

Hopefully at the end of the day, week, month, year… life; it all evens out.

This Tuesday I would like to try a little experiment. Indulge me, if you will, and make an effort to even things out so to speak. Stop, smell the coffee, the roses or whatever else finds its way up your nose and make sure you let someone know how much they mean to you.

The inspiration for today’s post comes from a woman who touched so many and prompted a son-in-law to utter those lyrics… in the end.

Let it Bea!

*(The End is the final song of  the sixteen-minute medley on side 2 of Abbey Road, the final Beatles album).

Haven’t had enough of me yet? You can also read me at 50-Something Moms Blog. For photo enthusiasts, visit Leaving the zip code, photos from outside the comfort zone.

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October 25, 2009 · 8:41 pm

The Burp Castle

burp_castle

File this one under, Only in NY!

I passed this today on a little family excursion through the East Village. Burp Castle, Temple of Beer Worship is located on East 7th Street between 2nd and Copper Square in case you want to visit. Not far from McSorley’s Old Ale House, this would make a nice beer tour if you are from out of town.

Not too sure about the Brewist Monks since 1022 a.d. but hey, it looks like a fun place.

Haven’t had enough of me yet? You can also read me at 50-Something Moms Blog. For photo enthusiasts, visitLeaving the zip code, photos from outside the comfort zone.

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October 24, 2009 · 10:41 pm

A Serious Man – Fargo for Jews

a_serious_man_poster

I am a HUGE Coen brothers fan. I know, no big surprise. They don’t get anymore offbeat than the Coen’s and I surely seem to thrive on the offbeat.

This afternoon, for some reason that I am still not sure of, we decided to see A Serious Man at 4:00 in the afternoon. Perhaps we are preparing for old age, but I think the real reason was the desire to watch the Yankee game that never happened in the evening.

I will not be one of those people who tells all the good parts of the movie and then ruins it for you. (you people who are like that, you know who you are). And I will not do a movie review because I am not Siskell or Ebert. (wait, isn’t one of them dead?) What I will do is give you a few comments about the experience of seeing the film.

Imagine the 4:00 show. Many walkers and canes and more than one person explaining what just happened in a loud whisper throughout the film. The guy behind us? Asleep before the movie even started. And, we saw this in a town that, how should I put this delicately, has a bit of a shortage for those of my tribe. Plainly put, this is a predominantly non-Jewish zip code. But the senior citizen Jews abounded in this little suburban theater (of the absurd) and became part of the theatrical experience. My friend complained of choking on hairspray when we walked in.

Having set the scene I will tell you that I LOVED the movie. But I will also tell you that if you are a not a Jew who grew up in the 60s this one might be a bit of a stretch for you. If you love films (not movies) and have a true appreciation for brilliant directing, amazing acting, some pretty cool messaging and great music as well as camera angles and incredible period set decorating, this could still be for you.

I could not help but relate to all the avocado green and burnt orange decor. The artwork and light fixtures, fabrics and clothing all brought back my preteen years in a vivid kind of washed out technicolor. I am pretty sure my brother’s Bar Mitzvah picture was hanging in the background of one of the shots!

The film was quite moving, at times hysterical in that Coen-style black humor sort of way and reminiscent of Fargo without the foreskin.

Jews, go check it out. Those not of the tribe, bring a Jewish friend to explain the subtleties.

Haven’t had enough of me yet? You can also read me at 50-Something Moms Blog. For photo enthusiasts, visitLeaving the zip code, photos from outside the comfort zone.

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October 23, 2009 · 10:19 pm

Like a Sex Machine…

engrish-funny-sex-machine

This amazing photo is from the James Brown Memorial Steakhouse in Osaka via engrishfunny.com That is one James Brown sized piece of meat in that picture! With all the bad press surrounding his passing I though perhaps a little fond memory of The Godfather of Soul was in order today.

Amy and Gary trivia: We walked back down the aisle at our wedding after the ceremony to James Browns’ I Feel Good. (We thought Sex Machine was inappropriate – get up… get on up!).

Here’s a little James Brown to brighten up your day. I dare you to Feel Bad when you watch this baby. That jacket alone could make anyone happy! So Good!

Haven’t had enough of me yet? You can also read me at 50-Something Moms Blog. For photo enthusiasts, visitLeaving the zip code, photos from outside the comfort zone.

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October 22, 2009 · 8:29 pm

A Day of License Plates

Some days I seem to be the Magnet for License Plates (MFLP) instead the MFTA.

I actually saw all of these in one day. Wild!

BBRNOTBB

How Hamlet-esque!

no-fear

I don’t really like to drive near a car with this kind of plate. Especially the ‘Noo’ part.

scaffold

I just don’t get this one. Love of scaffolding? Maybe a corporate car and that’s their biz. Still kind of silly.

XY XYXY

Hmmm. Ok, here is my shot on this one. First they had a boy (XY) then they had twin boys (XYXY).

If you see any good license plates, please send them my way. I am starting to have a really nice collection

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October 21, 2009 · 6:40 pm

Toilet Paper Advertising Smackdown

I must have died and gone to promotion heaven. For the second day this week a toilet paper brand is in the headlines. Yesterday I wrote about Cottonelle’s suggestion that maybe we were not wiping all that well. Today, thanks to my friend, Jessica Gottlieb, I found this Advertising Age article about Charmin’s latest PR program: enjoy the go.

charmin-enjoy-the-go

This one is sheer brilliance. Sorry Cottonelle, I remain brand loyal to Charmin and their program kicks ass… wipes.

A Help Wanted ad is a casting call for 5 bloggers to become Charmin Ambassadors. The job description and qualifications call for someone to greet and entertain bathroom guests at the Charmin Restrooms in Times Square and then blog about it. The job runs from November 23rd  through December 31st with a salary of $10,000. This should get around the new FTC blogger guidelines quite nicely.

This is my favorite line:

All candidates must really, really enjoy going to the bathroom.

Honestly, if you know me you also know there is NOBODY who enjoys going to the bathroom more than I do.

I know what you are all thinking, who better than the Magnet For the Absurd (MFTA) for this job. Yeh, well, maybe 20 years ago. But I think for now I will just be content to go down to the Hilton on November 5th with my camera and Flip. Every freak in NYC will be there for sure. I should be right at home.

Good ole Mr. Whipple must be spinning in his grave!

Haven’t had enough of me yet? You can also read me at 50-Something Moms Blog. For photo enthusiasts, visit Leaving the zip code, photos from outside the comfort zone.

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October 20, 2009 · 7:53 pm

Wipes are Not Just for Baby Butts Anymore

toilet-paper

The scene: My breakfast table with a cup of coffee and the NYT business section (that I fought with Gary to keep, BTW)

The article: Adult Toilet Training, from Madison Ave.

I would like to dedicate this post to my family, especially my brother and nephews, because no one loves a good chat about the bathroom better than the ‘Z’ family.

Let’s see, where to start? Ok, how about a quick overview. This is an article about the marketing of none other than an item that is close to all our… well you get what I mean; toilet paper.

It appears that all these years of wiping our asses and we have not been doing it correctly. That’s right. You see, now they are marketing toilet paper along with moist flushable wipes. Yep, just like the ones we used to clean up junior with when s/he had a super-doody-blow-out. Apparently ‘dry paper’ just does not do the job it should. I would think this combo would be great for all you out there who feel compelled to shower after each dump. C’mon, you know who you are. Yes, you would be the ones jotting down the product name for the moist flushable wipes.

Now, here is a priceless quote straight from brand management:

“Dry toilet paper is generally thought of as being a functional product, and a lot of brands in the category talk about strength and softness,” said Courtney DeSalvatore, a brand manager for Cottonelle wipes. “But we are reframing the Cottonelle brand as a personal care brand, which is a much more emotional space.”

Oh yeh, now we’re talking. I don’t know about you but there is nothing more emotional than the space where I drop the kids off at the pool (that one was for my daughter). You’ve heard this famous quote before, right? “Crap to the point of tears.”

It gets better. Cottonelle has put up this snappy microsite cottonelleinstitute.com.  Actually, quite nicely excecuted if it were not so ridiculous. Kind of campy and beautifully designed. But do we really want to spend this much time thinking about the act of wiping? This surely rivals Bowling for Tampons. How’s this for a mission statement:

“At the Cottonelle Institute of Sensitive Skin Care, we believe that the gentle care you give to the rest of your sensitive parts should also go to your buns.”

Um, well, yeh, I guess they are right.

You can set up a sensitivity profile and they direct you to the right kind of toilet paper or wipes to use. No really. I’m not kidding. You may also want to check out The Lounge ‘where you can relax, play games and let your caboose loose’.

Wait, wouldn’t a loose caboose require additional wiping?

I can not help but think of the South Park Chipolte Away episode I saw recently. That link is worth a click. Gary and I were dying when we watched that episode.

Here is one last thought I have on this topic. Of all the crap I read this morning in the business section, this was by far the most useful. (sorry, cheap shot)

Now you will excuse me but I think I need to go…

Haven’t had enough of me yet? You can also read me at 50-Something Moms Blog. For photo enthusiasts, visit Leaving the zip code, photos from outside the comfort zone.

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October 19, 2009 · 9:03 pm

Time to Cry Tuesday – Where the Wild Things Are

where-the-wild-things-are

“Oh please don’t go – we’ll eat you up – we love you so!”

I can’t help it. That line kills me.

Every time.

To say that I have a soft spot for this book is an understatement. A few weeks ago I mentioned that my son hit send on his first college app as the movie commercial aired. Danny agreed to see it with me. Part humoring me, part his own nostalgia, I suppose.

Life takes mysteriously coincidental turns. As we were leaving to see the movie yesterday, I did a quick check on the college website to see his status. Miraculously, before my eyes, the pending status changed to…

Danny_accepted-collegeAll sorts of screaming, tears, and jumping up and down ensued (that was mostly me). And then we went off to see the film. (which by the way I LOVED, but by no means should you take little kids to see this).

Sitting there in the dark with my boy – watching this childhood fave come to life – was such a MOMENT. But when that last line was spoken, those words were almost too much to bear. In my head I thought, off you go, my son, on to your next adventure. But in my heart all I could hear was…

“Oh please don’t go – we’ll eat you up – we love you so.”

Congrats to my boy who worked so hard to get all that he deserves. And I want you to always remember that no matter where you go, when you come home to your ‘very own room’ you will always find ‘your supper waiting for you’

‘and it will still be hot.’

Haven’t had enough of me yet? You can also read me at 50-Something Moms Blog. For photo enthusiasts, visit Leaving the zip code, photos from outside the comfort zone.

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October 18, 2009 · 8:33 pm

Shopping ; (

shopping-bags

I.

Hate.

Shopping.

No, for real, I am a Jewish girl that simply loathes everything about shopping. Of course sometimes it cannot be avoided. Like the day of a special event, for instance. I am famous for going out around noon before a party and looking for something to wear. Not just shoes, or pantyhose, the whole outfit. Yesterday was no different.

I started at a local boutique in hopes of not having to venture to the dreaded mall on a Saturday. I walked in, tried to act nonchalant and then there she was; the ‘Personal Attention Saleswoman’. Now, I know this is the basic reason why many women shop in this kind of store. I walked in and the PAS was on me in a second. “Can I help you? What are you looking for? What kind of event? Might I suggest…” yadayadayada, to the point where I am ready to scratch my own eyes out. Yes, you guessed it.

I.

Hate.

Personal Assistance.

I feel bad because she really was lovely. But, she was wearing both a blouse and jeans that were 2 sizes too small for her. Her cleavage was actually screaming at me as she adjusted the top I tried on. Oh, sweetheart, BACK OFF. I seriously don’t do the adjustment thing. Did she not know about my personal space issue?

The thing is, I have lived in this body for a long time. I am fully aware of what works and what doesn’t. So PLEASE, stop telling me how great this will look on me when I already know it is a ‘no can do outfit.’ Ok, so one armload of nothing looks good on me, this is all to expensive, no I will not try these on with 6 inch stiletto heels, I do not dress like a cheap hooker kind of exercise and I was in the dressing room, sweating, trying to figure out how I could make a beeline for the door ASAP.

Out of that place and on to the mall where I started to freak out almost immediately. There must have been some sort of Disney event going on and at least 60% of the people in the mall were wearing mouse-ka-ears. No joke. First I passed an old women with a walker, then a baby in a stroller, then an entire family wearing these things. Proudly! Gary has called me Amy Mouse for years after seeing pictures of me as a young girl. Ok, maybe I was a little mouse-like. I was convinced that perhaps no one was actually wearing these ears, but in fact, I had finally snapped and was hallucinating.

At one point I was in a dressing room trying to get into one of those tops that has the drapey overthing with an attached tank top and I was stuck in it like a straight jacket. (hey, if the straight jacket fits…) I was fearful that I would never get out of that thing and was a minute away from calling for assistance.

You will be happy to find out that after what seemed like many hours I did come up with a skirt I loved and made it work with existing wardrobe items.

Now if I can only get rid of this recurring dream about Mickey Mouse in stiletto heels.

Haven’t had enough of me yet? You can also read me at 50-Something Moms Blog. For photo enthusiasts, visitLeaving the zip code, photos from outside the comfort zone.

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