Category Archives: carry a camera

This mom is dope

dope-mom

Or is she just a dope?

This was taken at the same kid’s play as fashion dad. This place was blogger heaven. And what a perfect mother’s day post #1 (#2 will be the sentimental one where I refrain from parent bashing).

First, let’s run by the definitions of dope.

There is the Webster version, surprisingly puts drugs above stupidity:

webster-dope

I like to think that the last one is really ‘the poop’,  but hey, I tend to lean towards bathroom humor.

Moving to Urban Dictionary with their many versions of the drug definition, culminating with this one which is my favorite:

urban-dictionary-dope
Good old Smokey is one angry dude but he uses Gary’s favorite term, rat’s ass, so I love him x 10.

Then there is the definition that something dope is something cool (I am guessing this is the one she was going for). But we can’t rule out the fact that this mom could have just been… a dope. With the need to let everyone know.

Wait! Could she be married to fashion dad?

Leave a comment

Filed under absurdities, carry a camera, family, fashion, humor, moms

The Blizzard and the Bread Shelves

emptybreadshelves

photo credit: brownpau flickr

Sitting in my warm house (so far), we are hunkering down for what the media has whipped us all in a frenzy about: Winter Storm Juno.

Preying on the PTSD of a still Sandy-shocked population, they have had a field day with this one, and the supermarkets were evidence of that. I will share two observations and then I am off to start some serious drinking.

First, the empty bread shelves in the supermarket. I live in an area where more people are living a gluten-free, carb-free life than I care to think about. Why then, are the bread shelves in the supermarket close to empty. I predict there is going to be a lot of closet gluten-rich activity going on out there through this storm, no? Oy, the inflammation!

Second, is the insane desire to make sure one has eggs, bread and milk in the house at all times. What is this? Is there a direct correlation between a pending storm and the need to eat french toast?

As my dear friend Joanne pointed out just around the time that she talked me off the ledge about my Snow Warrior husband having left too late and being caught on the road forever, this is a misguided list. There are, in fact, 3 things that one must have in a storm, but they are not eggs, bread and milk… they are wine, toilet paper and coffee.

Indeed.

Stay safe everyone, and I will see you on the other side. Hopefully with power.

 

 

3 Comments

Filed under absurdities, carry a camera, humor, New York, New York City, shopping

Who The FCUK is Fabrice Yahyaoui

actorThis man is an actor. He fuckin’ wants to act. Cast him.

Indeed. Let’s cut right to the chase, shall we?

I love this guy even if I have no clue how to pronounce his last name. Fabrice Yahyaoui seems like the type of guy who will not take no for an answer. Talk about passion and nerve! This poster was plastered on the outside of a bus shelter in the East ’30s. I became intrigued and did a little research on him. He posts these all over the world.

The quote from the video below that hit home for me was this one:

“In life you have to fight. He doesn’t give up. I want him to make it.”

Me too!

We can laugh. And maybe ponder that this guy is a little crazy, but I applaud his method and hope it gets him work. It is this kind of risk-taking that sets you apart. He makes me want to root for him. I want to see this guy succeed. If I were a casting agent I am not sure if I could resist the curiosity to call this guy in. He certainly seems to have a myriad of looks, and definitely has the fire in his belly to work.

Hey Fabrice, I hope you have some decent monitoring going on. I would love to hear from you in the comments and find out how things are going.

Want to know who the FCUK Fabrice Yahyaoui is? Watch this vid and find out.

4 Comments

Filed under careers, carry a camera, marketing, nyc

Donkeys are the new goats

IMG_8840

I want to preface this with the fact that I live in a suburban area known as the North Shore of Long Island. That would be the Nawth Shaw of Long Guyland if you buy into that whole stereotypical dialect thing.

I do not.

This magazine was at the checkout of our local Whole Foods. Modern Farmer? Really? Talk about missing the demographic! There are no farmers in this ‘hood – modern or otherwise. The only thing better than this close-up shot would have been one with a woman dressed to the nines in front of the magazine rack. Keep in mind this particular Whole Foods is across the street from The Miracle Mile, a Rodeo Drive style shopping area.

You’ve heard the expression, “It goes together like donkeys and Manolo Blahniks, right? Of course, everyone has.

At first I thought this was an Onion type magazine. With that Headline: Donkeys, the new goats. And the Redonkulous seal (with an excellent use of hyphenation)

Other wonderful headlines that are a bit more relatable for this zip code:

  • Pot Farming Goes Big
  • How to Grow a Winter Garden (was this the follow-up to the Pot Farming article?)
  • Drink Bitter Booze (while you are Pot Farming?)

I cannot, for the life of me, explain why I did not pick up a copy of this publication. I would like to point out that if you visit their website there is currently an article titled, New Year’s Resolution: Eat More Squirrel in 2015. Yep, that was definitely on my list this year! You?

I quote:

“Locavores, listen up: if you want to eat non-GMO, antiobiotic- and hormone-free, lean, free range, local, healthy meat, you need to look up. Limb chicken, as squirrels are affectionately known in many hunting circles, is arguably better than grassfed beef or organic pork when it comes to planetary health.”

Affectionately, indeed. Limb chicken… I can’t.

And you are in luck, there is a recipe at the end of the article. (no I am not making this up)

I can’t wait for the spring issue!

(FYI, yes, I am pretty sure I am back)

6 Comments

Filed under absurdities, blogging, carry a camera, cooking, current events, humor

CSI Nursery School

csi

 

This!

I saw this in a parking lot last Sunday and it struck me as so funny. Is this where the little investigators go to train?  Instead of blocks and legos do they do fingerprint dusting and dna testing?

Oddly enough, CSI does not stand for Crime Scene Investigation, but rather Congregation Sons of Israel. Apparently no one thought about how ridiculous this might be when they abbreviated their synagogue name. But then to make a sticker for the nursery school (I thought the PC name for that is pre-school), and use a handprint, no less… no one? Not a soul thought about the humor?

Personally, I would have done a fingerprint as a logo instead of a handprint, but hey, not everyone is a graphic professional.

Having sat on a synagogue board in the past – where the discussion of roof tiles and catering chairs, traffic patterns and fundraising efforts are discussed for weeks on end… this?

Yep, I will crown this with the famous MFTA status.

(And yes, I think I might be back to blogging. There are simply too many wonderful things that amuse me lately not to share.)

mfta approved

 

 

Leave a comment

Filed under absurdities, blogging, carry a camera, magnet for the absurd, photography, signage

South Florida Living

20140413-200639.jpg

If you have ever visited one of the many communities in South Florida, this will not surprise you. The level of detail is astounding.

You have to believe that this was not written in the spirit of prevention. I would like to know how many poor people got locked in there before this very detailed set of directions was drafted.

I keep envisioning the condo association from Seinfeld spending the better portion of a month drafting this sucker.

The scary thing about this is that I am surely the most likely person to get locked in there. In fact, this was the third time I had thrown out the garbage and the only reason I noticed the sign was because my dad told me to take my cell phone.

8 Comments

Filed under absurdities, carry a camera, family, humor, signage, travel, Uncategorized, vacation

Hundred Dollar Mushrooms

1526592_10202890692772598_2091951079_n

Actually, that’s misleading. They were on sale for $89, so we bought 3 pounds.

Just kidding.

This big ole bucket of probably 5 grand wortth of ‘shrooms was sitting there just waiting for me to take its picture. Do you think they put them on sale because they were not moving fast enough?

I am unclear about what would make these mushrooms worth that kind of money.

Unless…

Leave a comment

Filed under absurdities, carry a camera, food