Monthly Archives: July 2009

If you think I’m a bitch…

if-you-think-i'm-a-bitch

… you should meet my mom?! Too funny, especially if you ever met my mom, the sweetest human being on earth.

Ah, nothing like a day in Lake George, the capital of the charmingly cheesy. Miniature golf, wax museums, salt water taffy, fudge, soft ice cream and of course, the tackiest T-shirts on earth.

I always wonder who the hell buys these things. Ok, maybe this one is funny enough to buy as a gag gift, but who actually WEARS them.

Then you sit on a bench and people-watch for awhile and you see all those shirts go walking by. Yes, Middle America is alive and well and dropping the green on tacky Ts. 

Crap, I hope my daughter doesn’t own this shirt…

Haven’t had enough of me yet? You can also read me at 50-Something Moms Blog. For photo enthusiasts, visit Leaving the zip code, photos from outside the comfort zone.

add to del.icio.us : Add to Blinkslist : add to furl : Digg it : add to ma.gnolia : Stumble It! : add to simpy : seed the vine :  :  : TailRank : post to facebook

4 Comments

Filed under carry a camera, humor, places of interest, road trip

Gone Fishing(ish)

gone fishing

Ok, so it is unlikely that a Jewish girl from Long Island is seriously on a fishing trip. Jeez, you people are so literal. It is just an expression!

We are off and running for a few days of rest and relaxation in the mountains. And to see our kids at one of our favorite spots around.

So behave, play nicely and talk amongst yourselves until I find the urge to blog, or more likely till I find internet access. You all know I am an addict.

Haven’t had enough of me yet? You can also read me at 50-Something Moms Blog. For photo enthusiasts, visit Leaving the zip code, photos from outside the comfort zone.

add to del.icio.usAdd to Blinkslistadd to furlDigg itadd to ma.gnoliaStumble It!add to simpyseed the vineTailRankpost to facebook

1 Comment

Filed under family, road trip

The Vixen Manual

vixe-manual

Oh yeh, this is what I am talking about, Vixen how-to on the subway. I could not resist this shot. I love the guy in the window. He is looking like someone who might just be in need of a vixen. Hey, let’s be honest, what guy isn’t. This is some scary stuff.

Since the image is small, let me give you the selling points (with commentary of course):

A vixen:

1) Knows how to flirt (lame, most women know how to flirt)

2) Never lets him see her sweat (I believe this was stolen from the Dry Idea deodorant commercial, not all that sexy if you ask me)

3) Can stroke his… ego (subtle… oh, puh-leez!)

4) All of the above (falls kind of flat here, I was looking around for a #2 pencil on this one)

How about these credentials:

From music video eye candy to domestic diva, there isn’t a relationship Karren Steffans hasn’t had. (ew! perhaps I went to far with my imagination on this one)

Oh, best part… available in hardcover and as an eBook (would that make it SOFTware ?)

Haven’t had enough of me yet? You can also read me at 50-Something Moms Blog. For photo enthusiasts, visit Leaving the zip code, photos from outside the comfort zone.

add to del.icio.usAdd to Blinkslistadd to furlDigg itadd to ma.gnoliaStumble It!add to simpyseed the vineTailRankpost to facebook

2 Comments

Filed under absurdities, carry a camera, marketing, New York City, products

Time to Cry Tuesday – Funny the way it is

late-show-theater

Indulge me one more Dave Matthews related post as tonight I had the thrill of seeing him live at the Ed Sullivan Theater. Yep, Gary and I not only went to the Late Show taping, thanks to a very special old friend, but got in for rehearsal and watched the band practice up close and personal.

Two Daves! What could be better?

Funny the way it is that one day someone is your assistant and you have them doing all sorts of ridiculous things like filling hundreds of little boxes with chocolate and tying ribbons on them, yelling at fed ex and making sure that the messenger has the right address; and then one day 12 years later they get you into the Late Show the night that Dave Matthews is on.

(or even funnier that I could think that last run on sentence was grammatically correct)

I am so proud of how far she has come in her career. And how effortless she makes her job look. She is one of the most entertaining people I have ever known, with a sense of humor that still takes me by surprise. You never quite know what will come out of that crazy mind. She was only a year or two older than my daughter is now when she came to work for us, and was surely the most over-qualified person to ever fill that position. It was a real joy to work with her.

People drift in and out of your life all the time. And if your lucky, they drift right back in and surprise you with how much you truly missed them.

Thanks SB, for a great time and a real thrill. I am so happy to have you back again.

Oh, and I am pretty sure Dave Matthews wanted to meet me, tell him I am sorry we had to rush out.

Haven’t had enough of me yet? You can also read me at 50-Something Moms Blog. For photo enthusiasts, visit Leaving the zip code, photos from outside the comfort zone.

add to del.icio.usAdd to Blinkslistadd to furlDigg itadd to ma.gnoliaStumble It!add to simpyseed the vineTailRankpost to facebook

4 Comments

Filed under friendship, music, New York, New York City, places of interest

Proof my dog and I might be genetically linked

meds

Scary, but I think it is true.

My dog has not been feeling well lately. She has been panting at odd times and drinking a ton, so I decided it was time to bring her to the vet. Please understand that I love this animal as if she were part of the family. No, I do not walk her in a stroller, I am able to differentiate between my kids and my pet, but I do love her  just the same.

Keep in mind she just turned 11, so going to the vet to find out what is wrong is a tricky proposition. Nothing worse than dropping 1,000 bucks to find out your dog is terminal. Luckily, she is not. And it only cost $480 to find that out – a bargain.

It seems, good ole Mel suffers from hypothyroidism. This would explain her weight gain (not the table scraps I have berated Gary for giving her) and could explain her other symptoms. Oh, and her pH is off (what the hell?).

So who else in this house suffers from this plight? You guessed it (and the photo gave it away). So, my friends, my dog and I are now on the same meds!

I am praying she does not get rabies!

Haven’t had enough of me yet? You can also read me at 50-Something Moms Blog. For photo enthusiasts, visit Leaving the zip code, photos from outside the comfort zone.

add to del.icio.usAdd to Blinkslistadd to furlDigg itadd to ma.gnoliaStumble It!add to simpyseed the vineTailRankpost to facebook

4 Comments

Filed under absurdities, health, humor, humor, mel, pets

Recession Rosaries

recession-rosaries

Yep, you can’t go wrong with these babies. I give a lot of credit to this vendor. These are a nice blend of recessionary reaction, trend appeal and religious affiliation.

Ahhh, AND they make the perfect gift.

I should have investigated them further to see if there was anything different about them. I wonder if they had some recession specific markings or maybe it was just a tag. The tag would make more sense. We are in a recession you know, need to watch the bottom line on every SKU. And surely you don’t want to be left over with heavy inventory once the recession breaks.

Perhaps they could expand their products with another current event driven line like Swine Flu Rosaries; great for the religious school market. They could package them with a plaid surgical mask and a little bottle of Purell. Great Back-to-School gift item that no kid’s backpack should be without.

Sorry, it is quite obvious I have been in marketing and promotions for way too long.

Haven’t had enough of me yet? You can also read me at 50-Something Moms Blog. For photo enthusiasts, visit Leaving the zip code, photos from outside the comfort zone.

add to del.icio.usAdd to Blinkslistadd to furlDigg itadd to ma.gnoliaStumble It!add to simpyseed the vineTailRankpost to facebook

Leave a comment

Filed under absurdities, current events, health, humor, marketing, photography, products, religion, signage

Cheap Eats

cheap-eats

Walking into a restaurant the other night I spotted this character. In respect for anonymity I cropped him. He struck such a resemblance to Frank Zappa that I had to do a double take.

I love the cover of the magazine with ‘Cheap Eats’, which by the way the restaurant is not. I never realized but our friend pointed out that $17.95 was kind of pricey for eggplant parmigiana. I suppose I can’t argue with that.

I wonder what article he was reading. The way he has his hand over his mouth it appears that he is astonished. Maybe he just ordered the eggplant parmigiana and is reading an article about where he can buy it for half the price.

Haven’t had enough of me yet? You can also read me at 50-Something Moms Blog. For photo enthusiasts, visit Leaving the zip code, photos from outside the comfort zone.

add to del.icio.usAdd to Blinkslistadd to furlDigg itadd to ma.gnoliaStumble It!add to simpyseed the vineTailRankpost to facebook

1 Comment

Filed under absurdities, carry a camera, communities, humor

Why I Am


dave-matthews-band

Yes, I just got home from the Dave Matthews show at the beach. And yes, it reminded me ‘Why I Am’.

Just standing in the Jones Beach Amphitheater – even in the bad seats – on a July night, with the smell of the ocean all around me, I am quite sure this is ‘Why I Am’. Hearing the music I love (that I discovered before my kids, the DMB groupies, thank you very much) I realized there is nothing like a night like this to soothe the soul.

Listening to the lyrics of Dive In I was taken by the irony of one particular line:

“Tell me everything is all taken care of by those qualified to take care of it all.”

It occurred to me that I am usually that person.

Crap! I am screwed.

I guess that’s Why I Am.

(‘night all)

Haven’t had enough of me yet? You can also read me at 50-Something Moms Blog. For photo enthusiasts, visit Leaving the zip code, photos from outside the comfort zone.

add to del.icio.usAdd to Blinkslistadd to furlDigg itadd to ma.gnoliaStumble It!add to simpyseed the vineTailRankpost to facebook

2 Comments

Filed under carry a camera, music

Stroller Dog

dog-in-stroller

As a follow up to the leashed toddler from Monday, here is another shot from that same day on the boardwalk.

These confused ‘parents’ had their dog in the stroller. Where the hell was their kid, on a leash? Or better yet at the kennel.

Maybe it was the heat, or perhaps people are just crazy in any weather. What worries me the most is that this is a double stroller, so they are either missing their kid or another dog.

To add a little interest to this post, let’s do a Where’s Amy on this one.

Haven’t had enough of me yet? You can also read me at 50-Something Moms Blog. For photo enthusiasts, visit Leaving the zip code, photos from outside the comfort zone.

add to del.icio.usAdd to Blinkslistadd to furlDigg itadd to ma.gnoliaStumble It!add to simpyseed the vineTailRankpost to facebook

4 Comments

Filed under absurdities, carry a camera, humor, parenting, photography, Where's Amy?

Time to Cry Tuesday – Childhood

oak-school-three

Oak School #3. From tiny acorns to mighty oaks.

This is the sign that sits in front of my elementary school. Just to the left and below the bay window that was my kindergarten room. Inside was the window seat that I sat on and watched my mom walk away the first day of school. Back in the day we did not go to pre-k. This building housed my very first moments in school.

I can still remember the way the stairs were worn in the middle of each step. The way the cafeteria smelled – a cross between tater tots and canned string beans. The nurses office where I took my first eye exam and discovered I needed glasses; the oval baby blue kind (very Brady Bunch, indeed). The amazing Austin Powers style mole on my teacher’s nose. (seriously, we even had a song for it).

The school alma mater was never so deep as to mention acorns to oaks — that sign was added only recently. Yet I do still remember every word. One of the more creative lines:

When I walk to school each day, I stop and look and then I say, “Oak School Three, is the best. It’s really better than all the rest.”

I know what you are thinking, who was the genius that wrote those lyrics?

Why the corny walk down memory lane? Because two of my mightiest oaks of childhood were visiting this weekend from out of town and there is nothing more fun than doing the tour of the formative years with people you shared them with. These particular ‘oaks’ were my brother and his best friend since 2nd grade. These guys were the coolest. Four grades above me, I was lucky if they let me watch TV with them.

This weekend we all spent time together. Going to the beach, walking the boardwalk, hanging at my parents house. If not for my adult nephews to keep us in check I am sure we could have easily reverted back to being the kids in the house. Come to think of it the conversation at brunch was as adolescent as it gets.

Just when you think you are all grown up…

your not.

Thanks guys!

Haven’t had enough of me yet? You can also read me at 50-Something Moms Blog. For photo enthusiasts, visit Leaving the zip code, photos from outside the comfort zone.

add to del.icio.usAdd to Blinkslistadd to furlDigg itadd to ma.gnoliaStumble It!add to simpyseed the vineTailRankpost to facebook

2 Comments

Filed under carry a camera, family, friendship, Time to Cry Tuesdays