Tag Archives: shopping

September 27, 2010 · 10:48 pm

Time to Cry Tuesday – philosophy(.com)

philosphy. Ok this product line had me at hello. Or should I say they had me at birthday girl. Here is a line of cosmetics that has ME written all over it. A lover of fine design and deep thoughts with a side of nostalgia and well… Philosphy; I am slain by this company.

Forget about the fact that the actual products are fabulous, the positioning of this brand has sold me even if it was dreck (which it is most certainly not) Their product names are all in lowercase (if you have ever received a social email from you that is how I write)

If I were asked to come up with a product line this would have been it. So needless to say I am a little bummed that I did not. Every item is named thoughtfully with a little story to tell and a lesson to learn:

amazing grace: “life is a classroom. we are both student and teacher. each day is a test…”

soul owner: “let’s review your only true assets. you own your values, your integrity, your thoughts, your words, your actions and therefore your destiny…”

Hey, these are some pretty heady thoughts for a shower gel and an exfoliating foot cream.

A big thank you to Dr. Judy for buying me this gift. I will leave you with what is written on the outside of the birthday girl kit; something i read at my birthday dinner and choked us all up a bit. Hey, you know how a table of menopausal women can get.

“philosophy: be grateful to have been given one more day, let alone one more year. remember to dance in your nightgown, sing in the shower, ride a bike, fly a kite and take an occasional “wind bath” in your bare skin. give those you love big kisses, huge hugs, and the words “i love you” often and always. nurture your body rather than starve your soul with fad dieting (this one was my fave!) spend time with the old and the weary to better appreciate your life. on your birthday, call your mother and father wherever they are to thank them for all that they have done for you, even if you think they haven’t done enough. watch the movie “life is beautiful” at least once a year. remember that you are not guaranteed tomorrow and that today is as good as it gets. thank G-d for every “thing,” every “day,” every moment.”™

Of course the ™ at the end did ruin it a bit, but hey, you have to protect the intellectual property.

So, to the makers of philosophy, you rock. And get yourself on OpenSky soon, you are a perfect fit.

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June 13, 2010 · 10:11 pm

Family Mall Day

Like This!

Once a year we have family mall day. Every June, between the end of school and the beginning of camp the four of us spend an eternity a few hours at the local mall. We are not particularly good shoppers, but there is something about an activity that we all do together with some short term goal attached that makes it a nice tradition.

Of course I spent 4 hours and countless dollars and I still have nothing to wear, but that is the way it goes.

A few observations:

1. People are 60% uglier in the mall. I am not sure if we too, become 60% uglier or just the odd looking like to congregate in these places. This also holds true for all theme and water parks.

2. For the most part, the clothing is ugly. I am not sure if that is true either but I know a lot of it is. And the price point does not matter. Sometimes the more expensive stuff is uglier than the cheaper stuff.

3. Mall food is… well, it is mall food. Enough said there.

4. Every store is playing the most annoying song in the universe the second we walk through the doors. (and remember we are a music family, we have very diverse tastes). Oh and there is usually an underlying layer of white noise involved.

5. The yogurt is DEFINITELY NOT low fat.

And now, because of course I had a camera, I will leave you with the highlights of the day. I am only sorry that even though I stalked a woman through the racks at Sterns I was unable to snap a picture of her carrying her little white dog in a baby carrier on the front of her body. Even I was a embarrassed at my behavior. Oh and the baby with the leash on its wrist… a memory of blog posts past.

So, I will start off with a little trend spotting. Seriously, everyone is going Techno Tribal! Um, do with that what you may. I am sort of at a loss on this one.

This poor chick not only lost her hand, she lost her pants. And by the looks of her Brazilian I am guessing she is probably not Techno Tribal; I believe the tribal piece requires hair. I am pretty sure I know where her date is, we ran into him a while back.

Yes, I considered buying a dozen of these T-shirts. But I am not gonna lie, the graphic was just way too disturbing.

And last but not least, sure the ladies like it! But sadly the Mustache has just sort of faded a bit out there. It’s generational, but no worries ‘ladies’, styles are cyclical.and those who still wear them do so proudly.

That’s all I got. Now if you are interested in Family Mall Day next year, we are considering selling tickets. And sponsorships, this day is not cheap!

Haven’t had enough of me yet? You can also read me at 50-Something Moms Blog. For photo enthusiasts, visit Leaving the zip code, photos from outside the comfort zone.

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January 30, 2010 · 5:58 pm

Confession: I am a Costco Neophyte

Not kidding. I have lived in the suburbs for the past 20 years and have only been to Costco one time. Until today. Gary usually does the Costco run. He loves keeping inventory, as my friend Todd would call it. And the CD section is his little treat at the end of the spree.

Today, I needed paper towels, Swiffer supplies and light bulbs. So I figured I would go with him to avoid spending $300 in the quest to buy those few items.

We drove up and someone had a couch on a dolly, wheeling it out to their car. They sell furniture at Costco?! Honestly, can I actually be the last person on earth who does not know this? Or who does not shop at one of the big box stores for that matter. I really need to get out of the basement more.

Not gonna lie, I did get a kick out of the place. And Karen, you were right, the little snack stations are simply divine. But for the life of me I cannot understand why anyone would think it was good merchandising to sell area rugs directly next to fresh fish. That just seems wrong. “Honey, I love this new rug you bought for the living room but it smells oddly like crab legs.”

My favorite purchases? 18 pack of sponges! Love that. And the big thing of cinnamon for 4 bucks (I make my coffee with cinnamon every morning. Hey, it adds up).

So, in my quest to avoid having Gary spend $300 by himself, we spent…

$325 instead!

Agreed, impossible to get out of there for less. But hey, we needed it all, right?

Haven’t had enough of me yet? You can also read me at 50-Something Moms Blog. For photo enthusiasts, visit Leaving the zip code, photos from outside the comfort zone.

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December 6, 2009 · 8:46 pm

Overheard while shopping

Since I am no fan of shopping I try my best to do little things to entertain myself while suffering through the task.

This weekend I decided to write down some shopping observances. The craziest thing about shopping now is that most people walk around with a bluetooth in their ear and appear to be either talking to themselves, or to you, which is rather embarrassing when you try to answer. I get the bluetooth in the car, but is it unsafe to operate a shopping cart while holding a phone?

Here are my favorites:

1. Husband: There is no way we are buying Transformers. You buy one toy and then they play with it and it turns into something completely different!

Wife: (leering at him like he was an insane person) I think that is the whole point.

2. Crazy bluetooth woman: I can’t talk to you right now. No, I can’t talk to anyone until I find that damn talking dog! (just another woman who lost the holiday spirit and her last nerve hours before).

3. Young preganant wife to her husband pushing an overflowing shopping cart: It is not the kids’ fault that money is tight. (oh man, I see big credit card debt in their future).

4. Crazy bluetooth man on phone with wife: What did you want me to get again? (guys, don’t worry if you think that is you, that could be every husband)

And this one is my absolute favorite:

5. Clerk at small neighborhood toy store speaking very loud 10 minutes before store closing: As soon as these customers leave we can lock the back door and close up. (there could not possibly have been an owner present. This was after she told me what a slow day they had and blamed it on the rain).

I will have one little rant here because, well because this is my blog and where else would I rant. I would like someone from Rite Aid corporate to contact me and tell me why a town of approximately 32,000 residents with 4 synagogues and two Rite Aids does not sell Hannukah wrapping paper? Seriously people, that little self-shipper tower with a few candles, dreidels and shopping bags does not cut it. Get your act together and put out some wrapping paper for the tribe, will you?

Haven’t had enough of me yet? You can also read me at 50-Something Moms Blog. For photo enthusiasts, visit Leaving the zip code, photos from outside the comfort zone.

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December 2, 2009 · 9:36 pm

What to get those ‘difficult’ people on your list

Oh please forgive me this post, but I could not help myself. A quick stop into Urban Outfitters today (no Jana this had NOTHING to do with your Hannukah gifts) and I came across these on the sale table. (can’t image why they were not a sell out).


I am only sorry I did not buy the whole lot of them.

The fact that they sell these does not surprise me. Keep in mind their demographic. And they sell a fart book with sound for goodness sake.

So, if there is a douche bag or two in your life (Ronni, I am thinking you might want to buy a set for that next PTA meeting) or an asshole you just can’t avoid having to buy a gift for, these would come in mighty handy.

I particularly like the design of the asshole plates, that diminishing spiral ending in what suggests to be the asshole of the plate is simply perfect. I am just a little stumped trying to figure out what you could serve on these.

I really think I need to go back and buy them…

Oh, and if you were thinking there is something wrong with your screen, no worries, it is in fact snowing on this blog and will be till January 4th. (you gotta love WordPress!)

Haven’t had enough of me yet? You can also read me at 50-Something Moms Blog. For photo enthusiasts, visit Leaving the zip code, photos from outside the comfort zone.

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November 24, 2009 · 9:17 pm

Pre-holiday Musings

I have been out of the basement and out in the world these last few days. Here are a few of my thoughts (scary when I let you see the inside of my head, isn’t it?):

1. Saffron. why is this sold like drugs in a vial and why on earth does it cost almost as much. Yeh, yeh, I know you only need a few threads but seriously, $15.00 for a spice? Do people snort this stuff?

2. Parking lots. Who designs them? And do they have little cameras in their offices just for kicks where they watch people lose their minds trying to park? You will be happy to know I have shed my parking lot rage and have learned to behave myself(ish) – I think the back up camera in the new car may have helped. But I have seen quite a few people with less than stellar behavior these past few days.

3. Turkey. What does a 28 lb. turkey look like when it is walking around? (and have I just ruined everyone’s appetite for the holiday?)

4. Cranberries. What makes them organic and why does that mean they should cost $5.99 a bag?

5. Airports. Why is nothing open at 10:30 at night at LaGuardia? Aren’t we the city that never sleeps?

And last but not least:

CHRISTMAS DECORATIONS… why are these up before Thanksgiving!!!

Sorry. that last one is a pet peeve of mine. Not because I am a Jew (hey I don’t yank out the Menorah the second the Halloween candy is gone either), but because I feel the need to savor the moment of one holiday before the next one is out there.

Sorry, but it’s kind of like those people that say the summer is almost over on August 1st.

So folks, my holiday message for you all is to try your best to BE HERE NOW. Where ever that might be. And try to spend at least one day with your glass half full (hopefully with alcohol if you are spending it with family).

Love. Hugs. And a spectacular L-tryptophan induced sleep at the end of the holiday to you all.

Haven’t had enough of me yet? You can also read me at 50-Something Moms Blog. For photo enthusiasts, visit Leaving the zip code, photos from outside the comfort zone.

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November 7, 2009 · 6:41 pm

That Dress is a Hawt Attack!

I have written about how much I loathe shopping. Much of what I dislike about local shopping here on the Gold Coast is the interaction with the sales help. I don’t like anyone get all up in my business when I am trying things on. Face it, most of us know what works on us and what doesn’t. We surely don’t need a salesperson to talk us into something with false flattery.

For better or worse, I have passed this distaste for shopping on to my daughter. Lucky for her she is walking around in a 20-year-old body so things are a bit easier, but still, how many women look in the mirror and are completely satisfied?

I bring this story up today because I was driving around and for some reason remembered this day and I laughed out loud. Jana and I were shopping for the Junior Prom and we made the huge mistake of going into one of the stores that I refer to affectionately as the Belly of the Beast. It sits in the center of a quaint little town nearby where unfortunately most of the women are cranky. Why? Because, as my friend Karen always says, “THEY ARE HUNGRY!”

From the moment we stepped into the shop we knew we were screwed. The racks were laden with bejeweled and bespangled dresses that were overpriced and lacking in taste. We were not there 2 minutes before a young woman came out of the dressing room and the saleswoman, who had a raspy, loud, cliché of a Long Island accent, shouted so that she could be heard somewhere in the midwest, “Oh my Gawd that dress is a hawt attack on you! A hawt attack I tell you.” Turning to the other women in the store she repeated, “Is this dress not a hawt attack on huh?” She gave the term Drop Dead Dress a whole new meaning.

Jana and I took one look at each other, turned, walked out the door and burst out laughing on the street. To this day when I pass that shop I can still hear the ghost of shopping days past in that smoker’s voice filled with gravel shouting, “A hawt attack, I tell ya, simply a hawt attack!”

Haven’t had enough of me yet? You can also read me at 50-Something Moms Blog. For photo enthusiasts, visit Leaving the zip code, photos from outside the comfort zone.

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October 18, 2009 · 8:33 pm

Shopping ; (

shopping-bags

I.

Hate.

Shopping.

No, for real, I am a Jewish girl that simply loathes everything about shopping. Of course sometimes it cannot be avoided. Like the day of a special event, for instance. I am famous for going out around noon before a party and looking for something to wear. Not just shoes, or pantyhose, the whole outfit. Yesterday was no different.

I started at a local boutique in hopes of not having to venture to the dreaded mall on a Saturday. I walked in, tried to act nonchalant and then there she was; the ‘Personal Attention Saleswoman’. Now, I know this is the basic reason why many women shop in this kind of store. I walked in and the PAS was on me in a second. “Can I help you? What are you looking for? What kind of event? Might I suggest…” yadayadayada, to the point where I am ready to scratch my own eyes out. Yes, you guessed it.

I.

Hate.

Personal Assistance.

I feel bad because she really was lovely. But, she was wearing both a blouse and jeans that were 2 sizes too small for her. Her cleavage was actually screaming at me as she adjusted the top I tried on. Oh, sweetheart, BACK OFF. I seriously don’t do the adjustment thing. Did she not know about my personal space issue?

The thing is, I have lived in this body for a long time. I am fully aware of what works and what doesn’t. So PLEASE, stop telling me how great this will look on me when I already know it is a ‘no can do outfit.’ Ok, so one armload of nothing looks good on me, this is all to expensive, no I will not try these on with 6 inch stiletto heels, I do not dress like a cheap hooker kind of exercise and I was in the dressing room, sweating, trying to figure out how I could make a beeline for the door ASAP.

Out of that place and on to the mall where I started to freak out almost immediately. There must have been some sort of Disney event going on and at least 60% of the people in the mall were wearing mouse-ka-ears. No joke. First I passed an old women with a walker, then a baby in a stroller, then an entire family wearing these things. Proudly! Gary has called me Amy Mouse for years after seeing pictures of me as a young girl. Ok, maybe I was a little mouse-like. I was convinced that perhaps no one was actually wearing these ears, but in fact, I had finally snapped and was hallucinating.

At one point I was in a dressing room trying to get into one of those tops that has the drapey overthing with an attached tank top and I was stuck in it like a straight jacket. (hey, if the straight jacket fits…) I was fearful that I would never get out of that thing and was a minute away from calling for assistance.

You will be happy to find out that after what seemed like many hours I did come up with a skirt I loved and made it work with existing wardrobe items.

Now if I can only get rid of this recurring dream about Mickey Mouse in stiletto heels.

Haven’t had enough of me yet? You can also read me at 50-Something Moms Blog. For photo enthusiasts, visitLeaving the zip code, photos from outside the comfort zone.

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June 25, 2009 · 4:54 pm

Um, did you steal that dress?

grad-dress2

Tomorrow is graduation in my town. If you read Time to Cry Tuesday this week you saw the emotional side of Jana’s graduation 2 years ago. This post is to make you all laugh, and get a full picture of the runaway train I call my life. I thought it was time for a little levity since all my girls are a bit weepy this week – myself included. Nostalgia is contagious. It is kind of like a contact breakdown.

The picture above is the bottom of Jana’s graduation dress. Why we had to buy one is beyond me because they wear gowns, but a day or two before graduation we were frantically pulling sundresses and espadrilles off  shelves in an attempt to have the perfect outfit.

Jana walked into the cafeteria to wait with all the graduates. She was sitting at a table with her friends when someone asked, “Hey Jan, did you steal that dress?” She looked at them like they were crazy and said, “Yeh, I steal all my clothes, why?”. The answer was an honest one, “Well, I was just asking because you still have the security tag on the bottom of that dress.”

Typical!

For some reason that spring everywhere I shopped they left the security tags on. No really. I swear I am not a kleptomaniac. A maniac, yes, but not a klepto.

The best part of this story is that we cleaned her closet this week and found the dress, security tag still fastened. I put it in the bag for the Good Will bins and drop it off this week. I hope they don’t track me down from my used clothes and try to arrest me.

Haven’t had enough of me yet? You can also read me at 50-Something Moms Blog. For photo enthusiasts, visit Leaving the zip code, photos from outside the comfort zone.

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May 30, 2009 · 10:23 pm

Department Store Buddies

headless_conversation

Walking through Bloomies today I came upon this scene. Just at the moment I was walking past these two, it appeared as if they were deep in conversation. That was until I realized that the guy in the black suit with the white bucks had no head!

It really looked like cane man was palling around with these dummies. Do you think he realized that his friend was headless? Or perhaps this guys wife is constantly chewing his ear off and he finally found someone who would listen to him.

For those who know me, I am not from the shoppers. In fact, I loathe it. I get mall head and I feel all spacey and claustrophobic when I shop. I found the camera helps keep me amused.

Here is another shot that cracked me up.

men love to shop

This was taken at DSW, a discount shoe warehouse. What the hell did this guy do that he had to make it up to his wife by going shoe shopping with her? And really, what kind of woman wants her guy with her for this activity. Hey, get some girlfriends, will you?

One of these days I am going to get arrested (or punched in the face) for taking pictures all the time. But it is a wonderful way to stay amused.

Haven’t had enough of me yet? You can also read me at 50-Something Moms Blog.

For photo enthusiasts, visit Leaving the zip code, photos from outside the comfort zone.

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