Category Archives: carry a camera

Keep Calm and Carry On

Sitting at my desk today this shot came through in an email from a friend who always seems to capture the essence of my day. It is the more civilized version of  ‘Everyone Calm the Fuck Down’ which would not be all that appropriate hanging in someone’s office like this was.

I particularly love the crown. It gives it a regal sort of directive that would make me feel foolish if I did not obey. You know, because I am so reverent and all in real life.

My friends, I know sometimes the world is on fire and it seems like things are just a little more frenetic than we would like them to be. Kind of like your hair is standing on end and you are running in circles getting nowhere. But panic never helped the situation. So everyone, please…

Keep calm

and

Carry on.

8 Comments

Filed under carry a camera, humor, signage

ITZMURDA I tell ya!

Haven’t posted a good license plate in awhile. This one popped up today while I was driving with my parents. My dad was very into helping me capture it and drove up nice and close. I love a family that supports my absurdities.

The best part is the bird dropping just below the wiper.

ITZMURDA. So what do you think this means? Do we have a gangsta on our hands? Or is this commentary on the daily grind?

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Filed under absurdities, carry a camera, humor, license plates

Spaghetti Muffins?

No joke, I took this picture at the store located conveniently at the end of our block, Uncle Giuseppe’s Marketplace. Go ahead, click that link and listen to the music on that site. Believe it or not, every time I shop there I am subjected to that! What happened to Beatles Muzak?

Back to the spaghetti muffins, at the economical price of 3.99 each. So what are these? Main course? Side dish? Hockey puck? What do you think the binding agent in these suckers are? And just for kicks, how many points on Weight Watchers? (does WW still use points?)

So, my friends, I showed this picture to Gary who told me they are just called spaghetti muffins, that is not really spaghetti in them? REALLY, hon? What would that be then, twine?

Not going to lie, I was in there again tonight picking up some ingredients and was really tempted to buy him one of these.

Anyone in PW try them yet? Please do tell!

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Filed under absurdities, carry a camera, food, gary, humor

Cotton Sperm

As I was going to walk the dogs this morning i spotted this on the garage floor. I could not help but think, ‘hey, there is a cotton sperm’. This could be because I have spent the last few weeks working on a fertility project for work. Or I am just predisposed to seeing sperm in things…

Gary argues at first glance this is either a dead mouse or a tampon. So, since it has been a while, I thought it was time for a friendly poll. Please weigh in.

And remember to pay attention to the details of you your day. The ones that you would normally pass by make for interesting conversation (or grounds to have you committed at a later date).

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Filed under absurdities, carry a camera, humor, polls

Everybody Loves a Good Fart Whistle

Hell yeh, let’s Party like crazy with some fart whistles! What could be better?

No, this is not a mock pack of something I dreamed up inside my sordid little mind. These suckers are right off the shelf of the party section at Target. I only regret I did not buy a case of these. Seriously, can you think of a party where these would not be a big hit?

I believe they are simply the fart part of the the whoopie cushion without the pillow part.

But please parents, no matter how tempting, do not buy these for kids under 5, there is a choking hazard warning. I am not sure if they would actually choke or simply fart uncontrollably from their mouths as they are tubular and allow the air to pass through. Perhaps it would more correctly be a die of embarrassment hazard.

In case you are wondering why I bought them, other than the obvious need to blog about this little morsel of MFTA…

They were part of my son’s 18 birthday presents. I will have to ask him how they worked out in the dorm. (hopefully not in library).


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Filed under absurdities, carry a camera, products

If I was a biker chick…

… I would definitely wear this sweatshirt. I was so excited when I saw this. Not only did it sport the A2Z that I use in my email, but the flame graphic is almost identical to a really poorly rendered embroidery I did in high school.(yes I did embroidery in HS, that was back when I could friggin’ see well enough to thread a needle).

There I was at a rest stop with an eery sense of connection to this woman with the really poorly dyed hair and sort of scary doo-rag wearing boyfriend. That sweatshirt was so damn familiar I had to risk pissing off the bikers to take this shot.

Luckily, i did not.

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Filed under carry a camera, humor, travel

What Flavoured Soup Mix?

I just could not put the name of this soup in my post title for fear of what Google would drive here. Although it is tempting – being a blog whore and all – to get some cheap stats by using the word ‘cock’ in a post title. But I have enough weirdos googling things like ‘castrated men’, ‘me with bulges’ and a big fave this week, ‘orange peel penis’, which in case you missed  it was an actual blog post you can read here.

So yes, my friends, for those of you who savor the flavor, so to speak, you can go home and cook yourself a big bowl of Cock Flavoured Soup tonight. Who knows what will cum of it (sorry, cheap shot). I particularly like that this is made by a company called Grace. And just because I think it takes a lot of balls (again, sorry, cheap shot 2) to make a soup by this name I will give the dear people at Grace a little link love and let you know where you can buy this stuff. It would surely make a great gag gift (ok, I am taking this a bit too far, so sue me!)

A big thanks to Paula P for sending this one in. Truthfully, who had better friends than me?

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Filed under absurdities, carry a camera, food, products, search engine terms

Love it or Get the Hell Out?

Talk about overzealous patriotism. I am not sure what would possess someone to paint this on the back of their truck. Do we really need more hostility on the road? Do we need to shove the U. S. of A. down the throats of  immigrants, visitors or citizens for that matter?

Is is not enough to simply ‘like’ this country. In this era of facebook the word ‘like’ has a pretty positive connotation. It crosses the board of things we love, like, just simply think we are aligned with…

I felt compelled to wait to see who got into this truck. But then I was a little afraid that if I did not love the shirt he was wearing he would have told me to get the hell out of the parking lot.

Yeesh!

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Filed under absurdities, carry a camera, road signs

Time to Cry Tuesday – Boyz 2 Men

Hold on to your kleenex, kiddies, we are in countdown mode till the youngest child goes off to college. I will spare the drama, but this post had to be written.

Those who are walking down this road with me, we all know that this will be the fall of doing whatever the hell we want. And that surely does ease the pain of letting go. But every so often there is a moment. One that gets stuck in your throat and makes it just a little harder to breathe than you would like.

This past weekend I got my boy back for a few short days between counselor at camp and freshman at college. As we pulled into the zip code he had just enough time to shower before we were off to a 5 family farewell dinner with some of ‘his boys’.

Of course we had to torture them with the cameras a bit. But I am pretty sure that this post will make them glad that we did. For in picture number one below, you will find some of the very same smiles as picture number two. They may be hard to find, what with the facial hair and the hunky builds (I knew you guys would love that one), but they are the very same smiles that kept us moms going all these years.

We cheered at the sidelines for all these athletes, and of course virtually for our ‘mathlete’. We have lived through your joys and disappointments together as a community of families as if each and every one of you were our very own; because in essence you were.

We let you puke on our couches (as little ones) and in our cars (as not so little ones). Our homes were all yours, and of course so were our fridges and pantries. Never once did our love for you fail, even when your judgement sometimes did. The friendships you have shared through these years are nothing to be taken lightly.

May you always know the feeling of someone having your back the way you have here with each other. And may your moms survive this without putting you over the edge.

I love you all. Now go out and be all you can be.

And for G-d’s sake, be careful!

Oh, and of course remember to come back and eat me out of house and home whenever your hearts’ desire.

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Filed under advice to my son, carry a camera, danny, parenting, Time to Cry Tuesdays

The Most Patriotic Dunkin Donuts in America

I took this picture at a Dunkin Donuts near my house. I was taken by the 8 American flags flying proudly on the roof. Hey, I am as patriotic as the next person, but 8 flags on one establishment. What the hell?

I would love to know the backstory on this one

Any thoughts?

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Filed under absurdities, carry a camera