Time: 6:45 am
Gary: Nooooo! Uch, now YOU get it.
Me: Ummm… you would be talking to who?
Gary: No, I am not kidding, you get it.
Me: (walking into the bathroom where I see both Gary and the Iko looking into the toilet) WAIT, I need to get a camera.
What, you thought I was going to stick my hand in the toilet to get that bone? Yeh, right! Yes, that is what that was, a bone. I have had people guess it was a sock and a condom. Seriously? A condom in my house? With my sans uterus, way past childbearing old arse?
Gary: She needs to get that out of the toilet. Go ahead Iko, you dropped it in there, now you get it out.
Iko: Gives the universal Lab look of ‘are you f’in kidding me’, turns around and walks out of the bathroom.
Me: Guess that leaves you, my sweet. Don’t worry, I just cleaned that toilet… um, when was that again.
He is hard pressed to believe I did not put the dog up to this… perhaps that will make him think next time he leaves the seat up ; )
If you have ever owned Labrador Retriever puppy you already started laughing at the title of this post. My last lab was a chewer as a pup as well, but it was so long ago my memory has faded. I am pretty sure that Iko is way worse. To give you an idea, here is a list of what she has chewed or eaten in the past few weeks:
- A leather flip flop (see above, she did quite a nice job on this one)
- 2 pairs of vintage prescription sunglasses and a nice bite out of the lens of a brand new pair (yes, I know, stop leaving them on the counter)
- 2 plastic bins that we kept her toys in (BTW,red plastic comes out exactly how it went in)
- A few indestructible dog toys from manufacturers with claims that they cannot be destroyed (they have not met
- A couple of mouthfuls of Biotone (this is a garden fertilizer and required an emergency trip to the vet with the bag and a call to poison control. They told us it is not toxic and she will just violently projectile vomit… um, that is how we knew she ate it, but thanks.)
- A ballpoint pen (leaving a blue birthmark on the side of her face)
- A client’s check (perhaps she ate the pen to forge my signature on the check)
- Countless sticks, flowers and terra cotta pots (she loves the garden)
Shall I go on? I guess you get the picture. Hey anyone want to dogsit this weekend?
Filed under humor, Iko, pets