Tag Archives: men and woman

A Situation, or Life with a Lab.

bone-in-toilet

Time: 6:45 am

Gary: Nooooo! Uch, now YOU get it.

Me: Ummm… you would be talking to who?

Gary: No, I am not kidding, you get it.

Me: (walking into the bathroom where I see both Gary and the Iko looking into the toilet) WAIT, I need to get a camera.

What, you thought I was going to stick my hand in the toilet to get that bone? Yeh, right! Yes, that is what that was, a bone. I have had people guess it was a sock and a condom. Seriously? A condom in my house? With my sans uterus, way past childbearing old arse?

Gary: She needs to get that out of the toilet. Go ahead Iko, you dropped it in there, now you get it out.

Iko: Gives the universal Lab look of ‘are you f’in kidding me’, turns around and walks out of the bathroom.

Me: Guess that leaves you, my sweet. Don’t worry, I just cleaned that toilet… um, when was that again.

He is hard pressed to believe I did not put the dog up to this… perhaps that will make him think next time he leaves the seat up ; )

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Filed under absurdities, animals, carry a camera, humor, Iko, relationships

What we say vs. what they hear

Today I was having a lovely conversation with my brother. We have been phone tagging most of the week and it was nice to finally catch up.

Somewhere towards the end of the conversation I said that I had to get going because ‘I had to go food shopping.’

He hesitated and then said, “What did you say?!”, with a bit of surprise in his voice. I told him that I had to go food shopping and thought, jeez, his life must be mighty dull for him to ask me to repeat that.

“Oh!”, he said, “I thought you said you had to give a blow job.”

Really?! I mean this was my friggin’ brother, mind you, not my husband who I would expect this response from.

Not sure if this was a hearing issue, like yoga vs. yogurt, or simply my theory of the answer to every question being, “a little head would be nice” still holding up.

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Filed under absurdities, family, humor, men, men and women