Category Archives: marketing

January 11, 2011 · 11:02 pm

Comfort Wipe

Oh yeh, now we’re talkin’ MFTA material. I big thank you to Jana’s friend Sarah for finding this baby….

The Comfort Wipe.

In a nutshell, this is a a plastic arm that holds your toilet paper while you wipe your arse! They claim this is the first improvement to toilet paper since the 1880s. Oh, you mean the year it was invented? So they are saying nothing has changed in the TP world since it was first conceived of… I sort of doubt that. With all those bears and clouds hawking the stuff I would think there have been a few improvements along the way. I mean 2010 alone was a huge year in the land of the wiping of ones butt with advertising smackdowns and the like.

Back to the Comfort Wipe, I love the idea that these people find toilet paper ‘archaic’ and ‘disgusting’.  They are marketing this towards those who ‘just don’t want to touch dirty toilet paper’.

You know, as opposed to those of us who really like to.

With a pitch like that how could anyone not own one of these. Of course I do wonder how the hell you are supposed to clean this thing.

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October 5, 2010 · 6:17 pm

Awareness Weeks

During the course of my work I occasionally get involved with creating graphics for different awareness weeks or months. Usually these are disease-related and we need to create a look and feel for these events. I love patient information work, it makes me feel like during the course of making a living I am at least helping to educate patients and families, making the navigation through the unpleasant a bit more palatable.

Ok, I recognize this is (so far) not a very funny blog post.

I always start a project by procrastinating on the internet in the name of research, or as we like to refer to it in the business – doing a search on what is currently in the market. This week was no different. Here are a few of my favorites that I thought you might find entertaining.

Handwashing Awareness Week (Dec 5-11). Funny, but a good idea. And this site called Henry the Hand – Champion Handwasher, just kills me. I love the remake of Hand Jive that they use as their sound track.

Mathematics Awareness Month (April) because you can never get too much math!

Aggressive Driving Month Hmm, I know a few people who could ‘celebrate’ this… you know who you are, I will not call you out. Looks like this one was dreamed up by a promo company, go fig. Talk about a ‘Hallmark Holiday’.

National Ethics Awareness Month (March) Note: not observed on Wall Street (oops, so sorry to my finance friends, cheap shot but you can take it)

Optimism Month (oddly the same as Ethics month in March) Pessimists need not celebrate.

But, by far the best thing I stumbled upon today was…

Rabbit Awareness Week (April 22 – May 2nd) “…because rabbits get a RAW deal”. Get it RAW… Rabbit Awareness Week. Hey, if I have to explain this to you forget it, ok? Believe it or not this is a week and a website (nicely designed BTW) dedicated to fighting what I consider to be one of the great tragedies of our time…

Rabbit Obesity.

Seriously, I have nothing more to say after that.

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July 22, 2010 · 6:20 pm

Naked Cowboy is suing again!

A while back I posted about the ever-famous Naked Cowboy and his quest to protect his brand. This man, who most of us New Yorkers regarded as simply another Times Square nut adding peripheral color to our otherwise drab days, turned out to be quite the savvy businessman.

When Mars used his likeness to promote M&Ms on a billboard he went out and hired himself a lawyer. Much to my surprise, and surely the shock of a giant like Mars and their not so savvy creative team, the (not so) little (naked) guy won the suit to the tune of 4 million bucks!

Now it seems our beloved undressed cowboy has gone one step further in protecting his intellectual (and I use that term loosely) property and has begun to sell franchises. For a guy who serenades without clothing in all sorts of weather in the middle of Times Square he has surely become wise to the ways of protecting his brand.

During a press conference on Wednesday (in his skivvies, of course), he announced that he is suing Sandy Kane, a 50-year-old former stripper who calls herself the Naked Cowgirl, for ripping off his Times Square act. It seems the king of the tighty whities already collects $5,000 annually in franchise payments from a woman named Louisa Holmlund, 27, who also performs as the Naked Cowgirl.

Now here’s the thing, and I don’t want to appear to be cruel here, but the woman who pays is, well, there is no other way to put this, she is a babe. And BTW, way more authentically naked. The new one, not so much. See for your self. Here is the ‘legally Naked Cowgirl’ in Naked Cowboy terms:

And here is the new one. Sorry grandma, if I were the cowboy I would not want you ‘diluting’ my brand, if you will. Oh and I would like to add; 50 MY ASS! She is pushing 60 if she is a day, maybe even 70 from this picture. Or maybe she just lived 50 really hard years, but seriously, cover that up. All of it, actually.

Yikes! This is just wrong. (I particularly like the woman on the left with the big smile).

Haven’t had enough of me yet? You can also read me at 50-Something Moms Blog. For photo enthusiasts, visit Leaving the zip code, photos from outside the comfort zone.

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July 15, 2010 · 5:42 pm

Flushing out ideas and marketing the crap out of them

Ok, today’s post is a little entertainment from the land of advertising. Is it still referred to as Madison Avenue or have the likes of crowdsourcing and word of mouth made that obsolete?

Whatever, this sucker came up as a facebook ad and I could not resist the click. You know, considering my obsession with ‘output’ and all. Would it really come as a surprise to you that a women who wrote about her colonoscopy in three acts would be inclined to go for the click on an ad with the title ‘Potty parody’ featuring a geeky guy on the toilet? I mean, a woman has only so much restraint!

I have also written about the Toilet Paper Advertising Smackdown so I suppose I am an expert the excrement, if you will.

Or won’t, for that matter.

So Clorox, don’t get all excited about me promoting your brand of toilet cleaner (mostly because I fear my green friends will get their underwear all in a knot over that… cough cough Dani and Jessica G). For the purpose of this post I am simply recognizing the creative and commending you on the facebook ad placement. That silly little targeting algorithm sure has this chick’s number.

The video is goofy but well written in an I-can’t-believe-how-lame-this-is-cheap-shot-sort-of-middle-school-bathroom- humor-that-I-still-have-not-outgrown sort of way. Tragically geekster hip but funny just the same. However, Ode to the Commode does not wring my bell nearly as much as the title of this post which came from the copy.

Here’s the vid, kids. See for yourselves. And there is a little poll at the end to vote for your favorite campaign name. Simply for my own entertainment.

Haven’t had enough of me yet? You can also read me at 50-Something Moms Blog. For photo enthusiasts, visit Leaving the zip code, photos from outside the comfort zone.

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July 1, 2010 · 10:14 pm

Sit Happens

Like This!

This could be the best company name ever. I saw this on the road today and fell in love.

Dog Training for the Real World. Odd tagline. Is that asopposed to Dog Training for the Virtual World? Whatever, company name trumps tagline any day and it is kind of a cool combination.

File this under ‘I wish I thought of that’.

Haven’t had enough of me yet? You can also read me at 50-Something Moms Blog. For photo enthusiasts, visit Leaving the zip code, photos from outside the comfort zone.

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May 5, 2010 · 7:30 pm

Drink No Evil?

Not if these guys can help it. I love when wine labels are clever. (remember Mommy’s Time Out)

These guys make mention of how ‘evil’ backwards is ‘live’ but I am not quite sure how turning the label upside down gives us that message.

Oh right, maybe it is subliminal.

Nonetheless I think this would make a lovely hostess gift…

and depending upon where you are eating, maybe it can be subliminal.

Haven’t had enough of me yet? You can also read me at 50-Something Moms Blog.For photo enthusiasts, visit Leaving the zip code, photos from outside the comfort zone.

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April 21, 2010 · 11:25 pm

Subway Etiquette Posters

Now this is something I wish I had thought of. Kind of like your mother telling you how to behave before you ride the subway. Thanks to The Daily What and a tweet from my idol, @guykawasaki, I found these and just had to share. For all of us who have ridden the NYC subway system for years, this is a breath of fresh air.

From the Daily What:

Jason Shelowitz is presently in the process of posting 400 “Service Changes”-themed Subway Etiquette posters on behalf of the “Metropolitan Etiquette Authority” on trains throughout the city. He encourages subway patrons to keep an eye out for them and take them “before the MTA does.”

Too lazy to click the links? Basic story is that this guy surveyed 100 people about their pet peeves in the subway and created these posters to try to build some awareness and get people to behave better.

Kinda wishing that the guy on the F train in 1982 when I commuted from Forest Hills had read the physical contact one. I am still skeeved out by him. And the religious ranters? Seriously, must I listen to that AND be stuck next to the smelly guy and the not so noise cancelling ipod boy at the same time?

Looking forward to hearing more about these. If any of you spot one please snap a shot and send me the location. Would like to track how this works.

Haven’t had enough of me yet? You can also read me at 50-Something Moms Blog. For photo enthusiasts, visit Leaving the zip code, photos from outside the comfort zone.

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April 13, 2010 · 10:28 pm

Lilly Pulitzer Animal Crackers?

I kid you not. This box is not a package comp, this is an actual box that I found at the supermarket down the block. (Uncle Guiseppes for those who live in town).

Lilly Pulitizer Edition animal crackers. Yeh, well I can see why these would be popular. You know, because little kids are heavily into designers. Especially terminally preppy designers.

I would have just taken a picture and not bought the box but they are supporting the WWF (no, not the World Wrestling Foundation, the World Wildlife Fund, but yes, it is funny that they have the same initials). And for just this reason I will stop making fun of this project  – showing quite a bit of restraint, I might add. So it appears that Lilly is working with Kraft Foods and Nabisco’s Barnum’s Animal Crackers. In honor of 2010, the Year of the Tiger, Lilly Pulitzer redesigned their box and Nabisco will donate $100,000 to support the WWF worldwide conservation efforts, include tiger conservation. (to learn more visit lillypulitzer.com and worldwildlife.org/tigers) Cool!

I told my mother-in-law about this and she asked me if the cookies were all bright colored and plaid. It had never occurred to me but I thought, wow, that would be cool. I opened the box to find that they were just ordinary animal crackers.

And then I proceeded to eat the whole damn box. (thanks Ruthie, for getting me to open it).

Haven’t had enough of me yet? You can also read me at 50-Something Moms Blog. For photo enthusiasts, visit Leaving the zip code, photos from outside the comfort zone.

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March 18, 2010 · 6:49 pm

Gerber Baby Wanted

You all know how I love facebook ads. This one surely does not disappoint. It would appear our friends at Gerber are searching for a new baby to represent their brand. No, they are not a client, and no I do not feel either one way or another about their product. Honestly, since Danny is 17 (years, not months) I am embarrassed to say I don’t even know if that is the brand I bought for him.

Wait, did I even give him baby food? Oh, I guess I must have, he wasn’t born with teeth. I think with Jana I might have gone the make your own food route for a little while. I have memories of ice cube trays of pureed chicken but I think that got too gross.

Whatever, this is not about baby food. It is about babies. Now for those of you who are not familiar, this is the traditional Gerber baby. This kid is friggin’ adorable, right. I mean that little button nose, the sweet little bowtie lips, the sparkling eyes laced by long lashes, perfect shaped head… you get the picture.

Now the baby in that facebook ad? C’mon folks this little sucker is scaaaary looking. This little imp looks petrified and I hate to be cruel here but a little alien-esque. Of all the babies out there, and with all due respect to the parents of this one, could they not have found a stock photo of a better looking baby than this?

Hey, I guess it’s better than using that hairy guy they used on the moms go back to school ad.

Haven’t had enough of me yet? You can also read me at 50-Something Moms Blog. For photo enthusiasts, visit Leaving the zip code, photos from outside the comfort zone.

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March 14, 2010 · 10:17 pm

Fill in the blank

Fortunately this blog post is not intentionally blank. In fact it is filled with the nonsense inside my head and a big fat question for the brand guys at Samsung.

We just bought this super cool flat screen TV for bedroom because, well because it was Gary’s birthday and I could not bear another life cycle event with him looking longingly at the TVs everywhere we went. If you read yesterday, it was a bit of an ordeal to buy and make room for this item. It continued to be an ordeal when our main man Carlos came to install this baby and he could not find the stud. Yeh, I know, it was a present for ‘the stud’ but I can’t hang a TV off of him so we needed to find the one in the wall. Built in 1939, this house has its charms, but finding studs in plaster walls is not one of them.

I digress. While Carlos was making countless holes in my wall looking for the stud, doing a great job installing the TV, I decided to look through the QuickStart manual and familiarize myself with the TV.

Ok, that is a lie. Actually, I did not even consider looking at the manual until I was checking out the nifty swing mount on the TV that will actually allow me to get into the back of my underwear drawer in the armoire by moving out of the way (the old stationary tv blocked it) and in turn touched… SOMETHING, that knocked out the reception on the TV. Did you follow that last stream of consciousness insane sentence? Anyone out there distracted by my underwear drawer? No matter, point is we needed to figure out how to get the TV back on again so I looked at the manual. Gary, on the other hand, called Carlos and he told us how to do it.

Never mind. None of this has anything to do with what the point of this pointless post is. Looking through the guide I came upon 3 pages that said ‘This page is intentionally left blank”. Really? WTF. Why would three pages be left blank. Intentionally no less. Ok all you printer and designer types out there, we all know that a saddle stitched (fancy name for stapled) brochure has to have a multiple of 4 pages because the sheets are printed in spreads and folded in half creating 4 pages per signature. Enough of the print layout lesson. My question to the brand manager at Samsung would be:

YOU COULDN’T THINK OF ANYTHING TO PUT ON THOSE EXTRA 3 PAGES OTHER THAN “THIS PAGE WAS INTENTIONALLY LEFT BLANK”?

I mean seriously, guys, a little marketing opp here maybe. Perhaps some more troubleshooting, I am sure you did not cover all the problems that I will encounter on that one page. But three blank pages? And your solution to them was to let us know that it was intentional? Yikes, I have been in the biz for a long time. I have never had a client say, “Hey, let’s intentionally leave these pages blank and then state it so we don’t look like we made a mistake. Ok, our work is done here, drinks anyone?”

Yeh, well, the TV is real nice, even if the brand guys are kind of lame.

Haven’t had enough of me yet? You can also read me at 50-Something Moms Blog. For photo enthusiasts, visit Leaving the zip code, photos from outside the comfort zone.

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