Tag Archives: family

December 27, 2008 · 11:39 pm

Maybe she was just hungry

hunger

I ran out to the market tonight to pick up a few things at an odd hour, 5:00 on a Saturday. And there she was, this magnificent mom with two equally beautiful children. They were all really breathtaking. She looked oddly familiar in a movie star sort of way but I doubt it. Just another well-healed North Shore Long Island women over-dressed for the supermarket.

But here’s the thing, she was a total bitch to her kids. Believe me, I have seen kids misbehave in a supermarket, sometimes even those of my loins. These two kids were not acting out, maybe being a little ‘overly helpful’ but certainly not worthy of reprimand. But the skinny bitch pretty mom? She did not have a shred of patience for them. To the point were she sent the little boy out to the parking lot to wait for them. (nice judgement, no?)

So here is what I am thinking:

Maybe she was just hungry.

Haven’t had enough of me yet? You can also read me at Mid-Century Modern Moms and at 50-Something Moms Blog.

For photo enthusiasts, visit Leaving the zip code, photos from outside the comfort zone.

1 Comment

Filed under family, moms, parenting, relationships, women

Tagged as , , , ,

December 25, 2008 · 12:37 am

Jews on Christmas

washington_square_arch2smThere is a long standing custom amongst American Jews to eat chinese food and go to the movies on Christmas. We, however, have broken tradition and celebrate Hannukah tonight with the in-law sibs. (the picture above is from the bro-in-laws terrace. not a bad spot, huh?)

We had a traditional Hannukah dinner of…

Steamed lobsters and clams.

Wait, not so kosher right? But they were delish. And for the vegetarians amongst us we ordered the chinese food so as not to seem like we were straying too far from the norm.

Tomorrow, our big fat Italian christmas with the best skinny girl cook in the zip code, Joanne. Can’t wait.

Happy Festivous to one and all.

Haven’t had enough of me yet? You can also read me at Mid-Century Modern Moms and at 50-Something Moms Blog.

For photo enthusiasts, visit Leaving the zip code, photos from outside the comfort zone.

3 Comments

Filed under carry a camera, family, holidays, New York City

Tagged as , , , , , , , , ,

December 22, 2008 · 9:20 pm

Time to Cry Tuesday – Nothing Like Family

Before I start this post check this out! One of my 50-something moms posts was picked up by the Fresno Bee! (ok, so it’s not the NYT but it’s a start)

This Time to Cry Tuesday mixes things up a bit and starts with a laugh. For those who are regular readers, you have heard mention of Gary’s toddler dance more than once.

Now don’t get all excited out there (especially you MizLiz, as I know you are dying to see it), this video does not feature Gary. But it does star our kids who named this dance and hold it close to their hearts. So without any further ado, I bring you The Toddler Dance by Danny and Jana.

Where is the time to cry piece, you ask? No worries. A good friend once told me it is good to both laugh and cry every day, then you know you have lived your day to its fullest.

Family. Some cringe at the word, break out in hives, get indigestion, run for cover. Especially this time of year with all the forced reunions and pressure to celebrate. Me? There is nothing more important. I was raised this way, it is in my blood. And I am fortunate enough to be able to say that when I hear the word family I am happy.

There is no feeling greater for a parent of a college student than the moment before they close their eyes and know that everyone is in their own beds under one roof. These times become more rare and increasingly precious. My kids may roll their eyes when I get this way – certainly Danny does because he has not left yet – but I know that in their hearts they feel the same way.

It is a tough world out there, and we as a society are facing very scary realities. But when you sit at a dinner table with your whole family and can laugh and enjoy simply being together, the world out there seems a little easier to face.

Thanks kids, for humoring me. Oh and being the first video on my great new Hannukah present…

a Flip Video camera.

How did daddy know I wanted this? Oh right, because I only mentioned it 1,000 times.

Haven’t had enough of me yet? You can also read me at Mid-Century Modern Moms and at 50-Something Moms Blog.

For photo enthusiasts, visit Leaving the zip code, photos from outside the comfort zone.

6 Comments

Filed under carry a camera, danny, home video, Jana, products, teenagers, Time to Cry Tuesdays

Tagged as , , , , , ,

December 17, 2008 · 8:17 pm

What kind of free offer is this?!

free-offerThis one is priceless. In my mail, addressed to Mr. & Mrs. Amy E. My Maiden Name (Gary just loves this!), would be this lovely promo.

And who, you might ask, has sent me this charming offer?

Pine-friggin-lawn Memorial Park and Garden Mausoleums. Um, park and gardens? Correct me if I am wrong but I see dead people!

The scary part is that we already own real estate here, thank you very much. And I am trying my best to stay the hell out of there for as long as possible.

What was the free offer for? A Let’s Face it Now booklet that answers all those ‘questions’. Like these (with commentary of course):

Do you need a will? (do you really need to ask this question?)

What does survivor do with will? (nice grammer – contest it, of course, that is what makes for a good family fight)

How about lawyers’ fees? (right off the bat I will say they are too high)

What 6 phone calls must be made? (1. liquor store, 2. liquor store, 3. liquor store, 4. liquor store, 5. liquor store, 6. dry cleaners – they always have the black dress)

How do you claim benefit payments? (call the high priced lawyer)

How do you arrange for family memorial property? (I am sorry here, but don’t we call these graves?)

cemetary

Keep in mind I do this kind of stuff for a living. I can only imagine what the meetings for this piece were like. Check out this picture. Can you imagine art directing this shoot? Cuh-ree-py!

I thought receiving the AARP card 3 times before I turn 50 was bad enough, but now this!

Sheesh! And a happy holiday to these guys too. Thanks Pinelawn Memorial Park and whatever, I will pass.

Haven’t had enough of me yet? You can also read me at Mid-Century Modern Moms and at 50-Something Moms Blog.

For photo enthusiasts, visit Leaving the zip code, photos from outside the comfort zone.

5 Comments

Filed under absurdities, fashion, health, humor, places of interest

Tagged as , , , , ,

December 11, 2008 · 11:59 pm

The Dog, The Smoke Alarm and The Rock of Gibraltar

mel_stairs

Let me start this off by saying that every year when we change the clocks I pass by the fire station sign that reminds me to change my smoke alarm batteries and feel very guilty that, once again, the one in my kitchen is no longer functioning. I make the effort to rectify the problem and buy the ‘less sensitive’ kind, hang it back up and all goes well.

For a few weeks.

It is inevitable that I will ‘cook’ something and forget it is on the stove. You know what happens, you put up the broccoli to steam, go down to check an email or two and before you know it the damn pot is black and there is a ‘light’ fog of smoke in the kitchen. Then off goes the damn smoke alarm.

This morning it was chocolate chip pancakes. Yes, I am a the model mom and I do make my son chocolate chip pancakes every morning. The day started fine. I got up early, remembered that I needed rolls, went to the bank and bagel store, even got a nice hot cop of joe. It was all under control.

Sort of.

Somehow I lost the rhythm of the morning and the next thing I knew I was burning the pancakes and off went that friggin’ smoke alarm. Less sensitive my ass! Now all of this would not be such big deal if my poor sweet dog did not have a severe neurological reaction to the sound of the smoke alarm. (You remember, the dog that the UPS man found in the street and put in the yard) I mean this poor pooch starts to shake uncontrollably at the sound of this thing. Perhaps she could use some meds.

Here I am with a broom trying to shut the smoke alarm, the dog is shaking, Danny mentions it might not be a bad idea to shut the stove since the griddle is now smoking, Gary suggests opening a window, maybe a door and then he said it. The dreaded statement that has come up too often lately. The one that proves I have lost my ability to do it all:

“You know, you used to have it all together. Now it is like the Rock of Gibraltar is cracking again”

I HATE that line. Mostly because he is right.

The dog? Don’t worry, by 11:00 she was fine.

Haven’t had enough of me yet? You can also read me at Mid-Century Modern Moms and at 50-Something Moms Blog.

For photo enthusiasts, visit Leaving the zip code, photos from outside the comfort zone.

12 Comments

Filed under absurdities, family, homeowner, moms

Tagged as , , , ,

December 8, 2008 · 9:40 pm

Time to Cry Tuesday – Please Help

camp-boys1

Oy, talk about time to cry…

This post hits very close to home for my family.

I have written about my kids experience at the summer camp that both my husband and I attended. Friendships made there are ones that run deep and last a lifetime. My son spent this past summer as a waiter; the ultimate summer at this camp. For those who do not know the culture it is hard to understand how seven weeks can make such an impact on a young man’s life. But for the lucky few there is an understanding of what it means to know that each and every one of their boys will always have their back. It is a sense of belonging that can not be duplicated.

Sadly, one of these young men is battling a very serious illness and we all need to have his back. This is a 16-year-old boy that we have known for many years. He is part of our extended camp family and when he falls we bleed.

He is one of 594 patients who are members of the Chordoma Foundation.

In less than two years the Chordoma Foundation has done some VERY promising research which could lead to new treatments in time to benefit those living with chordoma today!

But this research cannot happen without funding. Many researchers have projects ready to start immediately but are simply waiting for one thing – money.

Please join me in helping these families reach their goal of raising $300,000 by the end of 2008. If all 594 patients and family members pledged to donate and/or raise $500 by the end of the year they can get pretty damn close.  Any amount will help, it all adds up.

It is a custom in our family to donate one night’s hannukah gift to a charity. This year it is an honor to do so to help our friend. I urge you all to consider a similar donation, one less present at the holiday is a small price to pay for such a huge gift to those in dire need.

This young man’s brother has created an online Chordoma Community. Through this website, donations made in his name can be tracked. Please make your donation in honor of his mom, my friend Diane Seaman. This season let’s give this family the gift of hope.

Thank you all from the bottom of my heart.

Bloggers and Twitterers, please link, digg, kirsty, stumble, RT and whatever else you can do to help pass this along. Follow me on Twitter @amyz5 with the hashtag #chordomahelp.

1 Comment

Filed under charity, friendship, teenagers, Time to Cry Tuesdays

Tagged as , , , , , , ,

November 21, 2008 · 7:17 pm

Blogaholic? Me?

Print

Uh oh. It has happened. Blogging (and twittering) have now gotten in the way of my real life. Wait, I have a real life, right? I mean my real life did not get up and pack it’s bags while I was banging the keyboard, right?

This could be a problem folks. I may need help.

Here are a few conversations that have taken place in my house lately:

Danny: mom, you are obsessed with blogs.

Me: NO I AM NOT! (the classic doth protest too much response, how cliché).

Gary: I need to say this. I think your personal hygiene has gone down the tubes since you started blogging

Me: What? Are you crazy?

Gary: Let’s see, whenever I call during the day you tell me you haven’t showered yet. The other day I came home from work and you were still in your walking clothes and did not shower till midnight.

Me: Um, in my defense I never get into bed without showering.

Gary: And you did use the sentence, “I don’t remember the last time I washed my hair” the other day.

Me: Alright. Maybe I did say that but I did not mean like it was weeks or anything.

Come to think of it my nails do look like they could be in fashion if I were a rich young thang. And perhaps the fact that I still had sweats on at 3PM AND they were on inside out could all be signs of, what shall I say, a little personal neglect of sorts.

But I have been working at home for years. And have kids for almost 20 of those years (yikes, hard to say that one outloud). I have always spent a ridiculous amount of time in my subterranean office cocoon affectionately known as the command center. I have over-volunteered and fallen victim to the sandwich generation woes many times while working full time, taking care of a family and a home and still was able to take a shower in a timely fashion.

So, what makes the blogging piece the culprit? 

Suggestions, please? I need to be rehabilitated.

3 Comments

Filed under blogging, humor, work

Tagged as , , , , ,

November 17, 2008 · 10:11 pm

Time to Cry Tuesday – the reasons why Gary had kids

I first saw this questionaire on Yellow Jeep Blonde. Her sons did such a great job with it that I had to force ask my kids to do it too. It is a little long but a fast read. Last week I posted their answers for me. This week I am posting their answers for their dad, Gary. Wait, that sounded like we are divorced. Although he might like the idea of getting rid of me at least once or twice a week, as far as I know we are still happily married.For those who are new here, Jana is our 19-year-old, and Danny is our 16-year-old. Again, I urge anyone with kids to try this out. As the title of this post states, it reminded us why we had these kids in the first place; to grow up to be two of our most favorite people on earth!

Enjoy!

What is something I always say to you?
Jana: Do you want sushi for dinner? (that would be the night he ‘cooks’)
Danny: Schmohawk (a famous word passed down through the generations)
 
 
 
 
 
What makes me happy?
Jana: Winning in tennis 
Danny: Tennis (both answers a no brainer)
 
What makes me sad?
Jana: Losing in tennis
Danny: Work 
How do I make you laugh?
Jana: There are too many ways to write them all down (aw, sweet)
Danny: The toddler dance (this is absolutely so hysterical I must convince him to do a video, perhaps some coaxing in the comments could make this happen)
What was I like as a child?
Jana: Hippieee
Danny: Jew fro (again, with a little comment coaxing, maybe a picture will be in your future)
How old am I?
Jana: 52
Danny: 50 something
What’s my favorite thing to do?
Jana: Lie on the couch and watch TV with me (sweet)
Danny: Feed mel food off the table, so that mel loves you more and to piss mom off (funny and true)
What do I do when you’re not around?
Jana: Yeah, what do you do? 
Danny: sing charaoke (once again, video anyone? give us some comment love)
If I became famous, what would it be for?
Jana: Something involving music. Radio DJ possibly? (he would love nothing better)
Danny: Most amount of cd’s obtained by a human (creative)
What am I really good at doing?
Jana: Making me laugh (true, he is funny)
Danny: PIssing mom off (ouch, ok so maybe I do get annoyed at times…)
What am I not very good at doing?
Jana: Sitting in the car without saying anything while I’m driving
Danny: remembering/hearing things
What is my job?
Jana: Printer (kind of?)
Danny: printer
What’s my favorite food?
Jana: Everything… and to eat too much of it and complain about how full you are at the end of the meal
Danny: You eat everything (consistent)
What makes you proud of me?
Jana: That I have the Dad that everyone loves (true, true, true. i believe they say he is ‘chill’)
Danny: Your sense of humor 
If I were a cartoon character, who would I be?
Jana: Bugs Bunny 
Danny: Daffy Duck (hmmm, double looney tunes. interesting says the woman called kermit the frog and lois from family guy)
What do you and I do together?
Jana: Listen to music… Let’s go to more concerts together, k? (suck up!)
Danny: Watch sports and movies (lots of couch time in this house!)
How are we the same?
Jana: We both have a good sense of humor and love music/tv
Danny: Sociable (for sure!)
How do you know I love you?
Jana: Because you tell me everyday. (yes he does)
Danny:  Because everyday when I am so tired I can barely speak you tell me so when I get out of the car

Yeh, that last one made me cry too.

Haven’t had enough of me yet? You can also read me at Mid-Century Modern Moms and at 50-Something Moms Blog.

For photo enthusiasts, visit Leaving the zip code, photos from outside the comfort zone.

6 Comments

Filed under danny, Jana, parenting, Time to Cry Tuesdays

Tagged as , , ,

November 10, 2008 · 10:43 pm

Time to Cry Tuesday – the reason why I had kids

I first saw this questionaire on Yellow Jeep Blonde. Her sons did such a great job with it that I had to force ask my kids to do it too. It is a little long but a fast read. Actually my 19-year-old, Jana, did it in less than 24 hours. Danny, the 16-year-old, needed a little more constant incessant nagging coaxing to do it. Nonetheless, the result was the same. I urge anyone with kids to try this out. As the title of this post states, it reminded me why I had these kids in the first place; to grow up to be two of my most favorite people on earth!

This week I will post the answers they gave for me, next week I will do the ones they had for Gary. Of course I had to add my commentary on some of them. (come on, you know I can’t shut up!)

Enjoy

What is something I always say to you?
Jana: Keep your eye on your own prize. Don’t compare yourself to other people.
Danny: Be all that you can be.
 
 
 
 
 
What makes me happy?
Jana: Reading on the couch in the living room with blanket and family dinners with the 4 of us. (yes and YES)
Danny: puppies (corny, but yes. c’mon, who doesn’t feel happy from puppies)
 
What makes me sad?
Jana: Sad books? Or maybe when the school budget doesn’t pass. (she must be traumatized from my years of volunteerism)
Danny: George W. Bush (that’s my boy!)
How do I make you laugh?
Jana: When you curse more than I do. (um, yeh, well perhaps I should take a look at this)
Danny: By being ridiculous (are you getting an odd picture of my parenting?)
What was I like as a child?
Jana: Probably less crazy than you are now. (true)
Danny: Artsy (true again)
How old am I?
Jana: 28 (I thought Danny was the suck-up)
Danny: According to you… 30 (oh, right, he is)
What’s my favorite thing to do?
Jana: Go to the beach. (you bet baby!)
Danny: Think of ways to torture me (typical!)
What do I do when you’re not around?
Jana: Sing out loud in the car… oh wait, you do that anyway.
Danny: Sing “everybody was Kung Fu Fighting” (not only do I sing this often, they gave me a birthday card with the sound chip – they encourage this behavior)
If I became famous, what would it be for?
Jana: BLOGGING
Danny: blogging (one can dream, thanks guys)
What am I really good at doing?
Jana: Listening to me complain. (I have had lots of practice)
Danny: making fun of dad (in a loving way)
What am I not very good at doing?
Jana: You’re good at everything Mommy 🙂 (again, sucking up)
Danny: math (for sure, but honestly no one is going to mention sports?)
What is my job?
Jana: To make me happy. KIDDING… graphic designer/ soon to be professional blogger. Is there such thing? (there sure is)
Danny: graphic designer (yes STILL)
What’s my favorite food?
Jana: Eggplant (I can’t believe you know that)
Danny: I have no idea (I guess that is fair)
What makes you proud of me?
Jana: How dedicated you are. (wow)
Danny: People respect you. (wow again)
If I were a cartoon character, who would I be?
Jana: Kermit the frog (yes, we know kermit is a muppet, not a cartoon)
Danny: Lois from Family Guy (we LOVE Family Guy)
What do you and I do together?
Jana: A lot.
Danny: Lots of crap.
How are we the same?
Jana: We HATE shopping (yes we do)
Danny: Diligent (yes we are)
How do you know I love you?
Jana: Because you tell me everyday. (yes i do)
Danny: You tell me constantly that when I leave you will be found rocking back and forth in the corner. (yes i will!)

And there you have it. Just when you thought they weren’t paying attention!

Haven’t had enough of me yet? You can also read me at Mid-Century Modern Moms and at 50-Something Moms Blog where Jana joins in the election bloglove.

For photo enthusiasts, visit Leaving the zip code, photos from outside the comfort zone.

7 Comments

Filed under danny, family, Jana, parenting

Tagged as , , ,

October 9, 2008 · 10:03 pm

EVERYONE loves a girl fight (vol. 2)

For those who have not read EVERYONE loves a girl fight (vol. 1) you can read it here.

I am sure there were similar conversations at Yom Kippur Break Fast tables throughout the Jewish community nationwide this evening. Wait, probably not. Our family is… well let me put it this way, you are never quite sure what will be said at our table.

Brother-in law 1: HS was much rougher when we went. There were fights and greasers.

Danny: Well, there are some fights but when it is guys it gets broken up pretty fast in fear of someone really getting hurt badly.

Me: Ok, I see what you are driving at…

Gary: Yeh, EVERYONE loves a girl fight.

Danny: Oh, I forgot to tell you! I missed a girl fight the other day but when we passed by where it happened there was hair on the sidewalk!

Me: Oh, jeez, here we go again. (note to self: de-program son from neanderthal behavior)

Brother-in-law 1: Of course everyone loves a girl fight. The best part is when their boobs pop out.

Me: I give up! But this will make a great blog post!

Brother-in-law 2: Oh, and don’t forget how we hope they kiss and make up at the end.

Me: what could be better for a guy, a girl fight and then girl on girl!

And this my friends, is why you can never really tell what will be said at a family gathering.

To all my menopausal readers, do me a favor please visit my BBFF at Flashfree and take her menopause poll. 

6 Comments

Filed under absurdities, family, humor, parenting

Tagged as , ,