I know, my neighbors – hands down – have the best garbage on the planet.
I love this sentiment. And the logo is just perfect. To find out more about (oops) wine you can read about it here.
I took this picture more for the sheer joy of seeing (oops) in the garbage. Like someone threw this out by mistake.
Filed under carry a camera, garbage, humor
The first thing I will say about this shot is, only on the North Shore of Long Island.
This, my friends, is the bakery case at a local pet store. Yes, a bakery case. And these would be dog biscuits sporting messages in yiddish and hebrew. Both are fairly common slang that even those not of the tribe would probably recognize, but just in case, these are the definitions.
Oy vey! Sort of like OMG for Jews. In a sentence, “Oy vey, these people are selling dog biscuits with yiddish sayings on them”.
Shalom: Hello. Goodbye. Peace. Jews like to conserve and recycle. Contextual clues usually give this one away. Yet when someone says, “Shalom, my friend’, you might have no idea what he really means.
I must not forget to point out the half off sale price. Because, you know, we Jews love a good bargain.
No, I did not buy these for the puppy and yes, people did watch me take the picture. I am guessing it might have discouraged sales that day.
Filed under absurdities, carry a camera, humor, products
This is a quirky place, I will give you that. Where else would you see…
1. Crematory Services in a strip mall. (this is not one of those sign generator website images… this is real.
2. An ambulance in the parking lot BOTH nights that you went out to dinner.
3. Second night it went something like this:
Me: What’s with the ambulance outside?
Waitress: Someone at the bar had a seizure.
My aunt and I (simultaneously): What was he drinking?
The waitress did not get it.
4. This super sensitive billboard:
Can’t make this stuff up.
Filed under aging parents, carry a camera, family, humor
I am in Florida visiting with my parents. I am happy to say I am here, not because of emergency health issues, but on a planned visit to hang with the Rents for a few days.
As we were getting out of the car after dinner we noticed the beautiful full moon. For some reason we got on the topic of menstrual cycles coinciding with the moon and my dad shared with me that he had dated a woman before my mom who had a 14 day period. “That was never going to work out for me!”, he shared. Then he proceeded to tell me that he recently read her obit in the paper.
I stopped on the walk and said, “OMG, the whole reason I am here today is because of some dead woman’s freakishly long period?”
What? This is not the common conversation to have with one’s octogenarian parents? You didn’t actually think I came from a normal family did you?
Filed under aging parents, humor
No more bending to clean your feet? That just about says it all. These suckers suction cup to the shower flo0r and scrub-a-dub-dub your little piggies without that huge hassle of bending over to wash them. Because, you know, bending over in the shower can be dangerous. In some contexts. Or perhaps if you are morbidly obese.
So, the question is, are those two populations big enough to sell this item to or is that the reason I found this on the sale table?
Have to admit I am a little temped by the over 1,000 bristles…
Filed under absurdities, humor, products
This one was sent to me from my friend Doreen. Dor and I have been known to get into a bit of trouble together. We met in college and traveled cross country together after graduation. Do the math on that one.
This photo presented itself to her as a gift from the universe. How else would one explain that being with the enormous ass and the minuscule head on the left side of the shot. Actually, she said she had stopped to take the picture and he just walked into the frame. Ahhhh… the blog gods were working overtime that day! Hey this place has beer, wine, liquor, lottery and ATM… seriously what more do you need. Maybe a little Slim Jim or a Twinkie and I am sure they have those too.
Places like this should be declared landmarks so their signage is preserved. I cannot imagine a world without them.
Thanks Dor.
Filed under absurdities, blogging, carry a camera, humor
Or in this case, Lady. This story was just too bizarre to not share. And I am thinking of it as a sort of public service announcement in case this happens to anyone else.
A friend Facebook messaged me about an email she had sent that I did not receive for a project we are working on. This is what she said:
trying so hard to get stuff done but my house is infested with flesh eating flies…you should feature me on your blog… really…..ive been at that about to cry point since last sunday when i walked downstairs to 500 flies in my living room….uch…..
Wow, I thought, that is quite an opening line from someone I have not heard from in awhile. The visual of her lovely home infested with flies had sort of a Steven King feel to it. My response:
omg that sounds like a horror movie and no i did not get the email. what address did you send it to? flesh eating flies? WTH
I can be so sensitive.
Now here is where it is obvious that even a woman with flesh eating friggin flies in her house can still multi-task while telling her woes of this horrible episode. Here was her response:
where should i re-send to….i’ll send now…. and yes…. eat flesh of dead animal……took exterminator 3 days of coming back to finally find dead squirrel…. flies laid eggs…. on to 2nd batch hatching….. nothing they can do about it…. now that squirrel is gone waiting for them to die of starvation if i don’t get to them first…
So here is to you, my friend. Even though your lovely husband (and I do think he is wonderful) was in CA for the football game while this went down, and the little buggers seem to hide at night when he comes home so you are left to be the crazy woman in the house killing thousands of flies while your lazy dog does nothing, I still hold to the idea that we are never given more than we can bear.
And yes, I was not alone with my suggestion of mass quantities of alcohol because what else can you do in this situation but drink those little bastards away. Here’s hoping you are sweeping up fly carcasses (or is the carci?) and this will be behind you soon enough.
And hey, the offer to have the puppy come over and exterminate them still stands.
Filed under absurdities, homeowner, humor
I found this on Pinterest today. I love the idea.
Notes to self:
1. do not reverse order
2. do not do this with client work
3. this works great for ‘piece of my mind’ emails (double note to self on this one: don’t put the recipient’s email address in until sober to avoid accidental sending)
4. do not advise your children to do this
5. do not advise your copywriters to do this
6. do not advise your mom bloggers on a childrens’ brand to do this (cough, cough, you know who you are)
7. this could work for design as well but step away from complicated photoshop tasks
8. do not, under any circumstances, vomit on the keyboard (way too hard to clean)
9. do not admit that have done this
10. use spell check
Filed under humor, work habits
This is a banner week for people sending me things. This one comes from Natasha.
What a campaign! If you have ever eaten dinner over you know there is an inordinate amount of discussion surrounding…
taking a sheet. You could say we are a little preoccupied with it (or is that just me?)
I can’t imagine how they ever got the client to go for this campaign, but honestly I think it is hysterical and will surely get attention for this ridiculous product; Energy sheets that melt in your mouth like those breath strips with ‘vitamins’ and… caffeine, to help you with endurance when you are doing sports.
You know, for those who don’t give a sheet about their bodies (sorry, cheap shot).
BTW, their website is a gas. (I know I have a million of these)
Filed under absurdities, humor, products
Do you ever wonder who writes these guides? Did someone post a complaint on the Facebook page of the Wahl Lithium Home Hair Cutter complaining that they had tried poking their eyes with this item and it caused injury? Did this person’s parents never use the phrase, ‘Knock it off, you’ll poke your eye out’ whilst they were fiddling around with something as a kid?
A big thanks to Joyce for sending this baby over just as I was pondering a topic for today’s post. Another reader sent me something yesterday that I am contemplating posting but it might just be too outrageous for me (doubtful).
Filed under absurdities, humor, products
i could cry but i don't have time 