Could there be a bumper sticker that is better suited for me? We were behind this car on the way into the mall and wouldn’t you know my darling daughter grabbed for the camera before I needed to ask.
Love that kid.
It does blow my mind that someone would actually put this on their car. It’s one thing to have an edge, it’s another to announce it to everyone on the road.
Maybe someone put it on there and she has no idea!
Filed under humor
Seriously, Zara? You really named your perfume ‘oh my cherry’ (nice typography BTW). Gotta admit it was pretty ballsy in a … well you know, cherry sort of way.
This was perched at the counter when I went to pay yesterday. I even commented to the cashier. “Really?!”, I said. “I know, right?” was her response. She said the employees were all surprised, but people love it.
Hey, who could pass this up? What a great gift item. Sort of a stocking stuffer, if you will.
Filed under absurdities, carry a camera, humor, marketing, products
Ahhh… yet another submission to the Magnet For The Absurd. Thanks to Lon for sending in the fabulous picture.
I don’t know about you guys but I would take advantage of this often… my dog stinks! Seriously, she suffers from D.O. big time. Gary would simply love this as he is a frequent flyer at most car washes near his office.
I would love to see the inside of this place. 
Filed under absurdities, humor, magnet for the absurd
Yeh, that post title is a blog whore’s way of getting some (albeit unsavory) traffic. So shoot me. And no, my son had nothing to do with this… I hope. Actually, he could very well have been one of the dozen or so people gathered on the street watching this unfold, or undress as the case may be. A big thank you to Dr. Jimmy for sending this one to me.
This is one crazy story. It appears that 25-year-old Kevin Horner (seriously? is that REALLY his name?) took to jumping on the bed of a second floor hotel room in – of all places – Madison, WI. Mr. Horny, I mean Horner, was jumping in front of the window of his room at the University Inn on Frances and State Streets…. sans pants.
I happen to know his corner quite well as it directly across the street from the freshman dorm that both my kids lived in. In fact, you could be running on the treadmill in the second floor gym and look straight into the window that Kevin was wiggling his johnson in. (no not on Johnson Street, that was Frances Street).
The arresting officer said his goal was to keep any innocent bystanders from being exposed and offended by the view. Damn, that guy is no fun! Unless of course the Horner Johnson was, in fact, an offensive looking one.
Horner admitted, “I made a mistake and should have kept my pants on”.
Why is no one asking why a 25-year-old was jumping on the bed?
Can’t make this stuff up.
Filed under absurdities, college, current events, danny, humor, travel
A big thank you to Uncle Neal for today’s photo. I love that people think of me while they are out and about and snap a shot here and there to send for my amusement (and yours, I suppose). I always loved a company named Acme; it reminds me of the old Roadrunner cartoons.
As Neal said, it is always comforting to know that other people are out there busting their cubes in this economy.
Filed under absurdities, carry a camera, humor
If you have spent time in Madison, Wisconsin you would know Scanner Dan. He is sort of famous. He hangs on State Street, carrying a police scanner. He is a true character. He talks to himself and makes running commentary about the people that pass by. He is known to shout out sorority names as girls pass by, giving his opinion on their affiliation.
While I was in Madison last week, my Dan and I spotted him at an outdoor cafe table. I had to get this picture of Dan Squared.
My kids really are good sports, aren’t they?
Filed under absurdities, carry a camera, danny, humor
Ok, T minus who the hell knows how many hours till the storm hits the Island of Long. To all my east coast friends, sit tight, drink often and remember that if you have a coffee press you don’t need electricity.
For those who are worried about my parents, they are safely evacuated to my house and we are hunkering with plenty of alcohol (for me) and a puzzle. May AT&T stay live so my iPad remains working and may you all have an easy hurricane (sort of like an easy fast on Yom Kippur for my fellow tribesman).
BTW, bbm or text Jana if you can. She is stuck in this house with her parents and grandparents; yep she is pretty glad she graduated and is living home! (thank goodness she has the dog).
Two more sleeps and this damn thing will be over.
Filed under current events, weather
Things have been a bit off-kilter lately. Not sure if it is because I have had this miserable cold, sinus, cough thing or maybe the stars are just aligning in a weird way. Yesterday was so damn crazy even I, the ever famous MFTA, was surprised.
In my post Madison, flying with bad sinuses, I can hardly hear anymore stupor, I sat at my desk yesterday and started banging away at my list as if it were any other day. Of course my phones have not been working correctly since Verizon went on strike. A coincidence? I think not. For a couple of weeks I would get static and crossed lines, only from 1-5 PM. Yesterday they were pretty much unusable. There was constant static, calls dropping, lines crossing… pretty much a train wreck. So I used my cell and called it a day after Verizon finally gave me a repair date this week as opposed to the September 16th date they gave me last week.
Around 11:30 my doorbell rang. I opened the door to a police man:
Him: (sort of looking behind me) Mrs. Levinson, are you ok?
Me: Well, I have a bit of a cold and cough, but otherwise, I’m good. Why?
Him: You dialed 911 and when we called back all we got was static.
Me: Nope, not me. My phones are not working, all I have is static. Wait, did you guys think I dialed 911 and then my lines were cut? Yikes. Sorry, it appears my phones are randomly dialing out themselves!
Just as I said that ANOTHER cop car pulled up. I am guessing these guys were not all that thrilled with what could have been going on here. (CSI-PW?)
I sent them on their merry way, thanking them for their attentiveness and went back to work. Around 2:00 I was sitting at my desk when my chair started to vibrate. Hmmmm… nice feature but I don’t remember installing it. Then all the stuff on the bulletin board started to swing. I ran upstairs and the keychain lanyard was swinging on the hook. When I called Gary and told him I felt an earthquake he told me I was crazy and it was probably a big truck.
Indeed. We’ll see who’s crazy!
Filed under humor, magnet for the absurd
Five years, two kids, hundreds of pounds of luggage and thousands of dollars at Bed Bath and Target and you would think I had this thing down pat already. Actually, the funny part is I really thought I did. Until of course I reached the rental car line at the Milwaukee airport and realized that somewhere between the security check at LGA and the very spot I was standing I had somehow…
LOST MY LICENSE.
Loud enough? I wrote that in caps because I want you all to understand the gravity of being 74 miles from Madison with upwards of 160 lbs of luggage, 150 lbs of boy and NO CAR. That’s right kiddies… almost 52 years old and I am still losing my license. I like to think of it as part of my charm. My son likes to think of it as one of my least endearing qualities.
After a few moments of OMG panic and what the hell are we going to do now behavior I figuratively slapped myself across the face and subscribed to my friend Jeanne’s famous theory, “Money is the answer, now tell me your problem”. Let me just interject with the fact that I do not really believe that, although outside of loss, health issues and affairs of the heart it is hard to argue the point that money can’t fix most things. It certainly fixed this problem.
I would like to thank my new BFF Jodi, from Step Ahead Services in Madison, WI who jumped in her town car and rescued me from winning the Loser Mother of the Year Award. If you are ever in the Milwaukee/Madison area please consider using their services. Not only did she drop everything and get to us as fast as humanly possible, she agreed to take us to Bed Bath/Target, stop at my hotel to drop my bags, a restaurant to pick up Danny’s keys from his roomies and ultimately to his apartment – all at no extra charge.
While waiting for Jodi I ran around the airport reporting the lost license to the airport sherrif’s department, where I met the lovely Officer James who had a hard time understanding my NY accent along with the brewing laryngitis from the plague I have been suffering. Then there was the fabulous Luce at the AirTran lost and found and of course the ever sympathetic crowd at the Enterprise office who were praying that I did not start to cry while begging them to rent me a car to an 18 year old. (no go, btw). Almost got them to drive us to Madison for the price of my rental.
The saga continued and yes I was able to fly back thanks to the fact that I have lost my license before and had a spare one that was not expired in my house (hold the comments on pattern of behavior, please). My hero Jimmy G just happened to be flying back to Madtown from Equifunk on Sunday and promptly delivered it to my hotel… indebted to that boy for life. AND of course my dear friends Linda and Richie made sure to rescue me to the bar that first night and help me see the humor in the situation.
All in all a lesson learned.
Don’t lose your damn license when you are traveling!
This one comes to us from Uncle Neal. Today was a big day for submissions. Sue sent another great one which I will use tomorrow. I love when I am sent blog fodder and I don’t have to come up with anything clever on my own.
This particular sign is just too good to be true – Kettle Ho. There is of course the kettle and the hoe… but then why drop the ‘e’ on hoe. And the mermaid? I hate to be crass but are mermaids anatomically correct to be able to fulfill the ho requirement?
Now it gets better. This place, in Cotuit, MA (how do you pronounce that?), is also the home of Mycock Real Estate.
So Neal, what did they serve there?
i could cry but i don't have time 