Tag Archives: cell phones

The earthquake wasn’t the weirdest part of my day

Things have been a bit off-kilter lately. Not sure if it is because I have had this miserable cold, sinus, cough thing or maybe the stars are just aligning in a weird way. Yesterday was so damn crazy even I, the ever famous MFTA, was surprised.

In my post Madison, flying with bad sinuses, I can hardly hear anymore stupor, I sat at my desk yesterday and started banging away at my list as if it were any other day. Of course my phones have not been working correctly since Verizon went on strike. A coincidence? I think not. For a couple of weeks I would get static and crossed lines, only from 1-5 PM. Yesterday they were pretty much unusable. There was constant static, calls dropping, lines crossing… pretty much a train wreck. So I used my cell and called it a day after Verizon finally gave me a repair date this week as opposed to the September 16th date they gave me last week.

Around 11:30 my doorbell rang. I opened the door to a police man:

Him: (sort of looking behind me) Mrs. Levinson, are you ok?

Me: Well, I have a bit of a cold and cough, but otherwise, I’m good. Why?

Him: You dialed 911 and when we called back all we got was static.

Me: Nope, not me. My phones are not working, all I have is static. Wait, did you guys think I dialed 911 and then my lines were cut? Yikes. Sorry, it appears my phones are randomly dialing out themselves!

Just as I said that ANOTHER cop car pulled up. I am guessing these guys were not all that thrilled with what could have been going on here. (CSI-PW?)

I sent them on their merry way, thanking them for their attentiveness and went back to work. Around 2:00 I was sitting at my desk when my chair started to vibrate. Hmmmm… nice feature but I don’t remember installing it. Then all the stuff on the bulletin board started to swing. I ran upstairs and the keychain lanyard was swinging on the hook. When I called Gary and told him I felt an earthquake he told me I was crazy and it was probably a big truck.

Indeed. We’ll see who’s crazy!

1 Comment

Filed under humor, magnet for the absurd

To the woman in the nail salon

Ok, I admit it. Towards the end of the day on a work day I skipped out for a manicure.  I had a tragically low broken nail that needed to be attended to. It was more necessary maintenance than pleasure. If you are a guy you think… “women!” If you are a woman you think, “damn, I hate when that happens.”

Here’s the thing. I don’t really have the kind of job that translates well into public places. These 50-year-old eyes are getting too old to view artwork on a blackberry and I am stuck zooming all over the place trying to make an intelligent comment when people send me stuff. (there that iphone envy goes rearing its ugly head again) Add that to the fact that I collaborate with a team and need to chat it up in the thick of a project. Oh and to top it all off we are always working on impossible deadlines.

So… I admit it. I was the women on the phone at the nail salon. Well, actually, not the only one as the woman across from me got a call and she was a realtor who was at the last stages of a deal where the parties were only $20,000 apart and she had to give the old, “I am in a meeting I will get back to you as soon as I am in the office” routine.

Back to my call. There was no option not to take it. Decisions had to made, time is money, yadayadayada. So woman number 3 sitting at the nail dryer, let me refer to her as THE MOST ANNOYING PERSON ON THIS EARTH. She tells me when I end the call, “you know, you don’t always have to take the call. things can wait. sometimes it is beneficial to keep them waiting.”

THEM? Sweetheart, who are your THEM? In this market, no one waits in my book.

And seriously, you were giving me your opinion because? Oh right, because you ARE THE MOST ANNOYING PERSON ON THIS EARTH!

You see, right here is why I have a blog. The beauty of this here little slice of the interwebs is that when I am on my last friggin’ nerve, I have a perfect place to vent.

And the best part about it is that THE MOST ANNOYING PERSON ON THIS EARTH has no business being here.

Ahhh, now I feel better.

Haven’t had enough of me yet? You can also read me at 50-Something Moms Blog. For photo enthusiasts, visit Leaving the zip code, photos from outside the comfort zone.

add to del.icio.usAdd to Blinkslistadd to furlDigg itadd to ma.gnoliaStumble It!add to simpyseed the vineTailRankpost to facebook


Filed under absurdities, blogging, conversations, work, work habits

To the young women on the cell phone on the train…

Travelling backpacker

Did you think you were alone in that car? Were you under the impression that all of us sitting near you were deaf? More than once I have been on a train where people have aired their dirty laundry as if they were the only ones around. I have heard about family feuds, business deals gone bad, the intimate details of teen children’s social lives and marriages on the brink. But never have I heard a conversation quite like this one.

By the end of the 35 minute trip to the city I knew more about your life than I do about most of my dear friends. Because of the sheer stupidity of airing your dirty laundry on a commuter train, I will honor that by sharing some sound bytes with my readers. Hold on to your hats, kids, this chick is out there. Quotes are from her, italics are my commentary.

“So he said to me, “Tell your dad if all he cares about is his money, he can suck my dick.” 

Hmmm, good start, right?

“I mean he broke my heart and stole my money. I told him he is going to have to work really hard to win me back.”

Ummm, why do you WANT him back?

“He wants to know why we can’t just be together. It’s so sad cuz we used to have so much fun till he stole my (dad’s) credit cards.”

Wait, he stole your credit cards and you are thinking you can work things out?

“He complained that my family is just all about the money and I told him that is what Long Island is like. He’s from Brooklyn and just does not get it.”

Sweetie, I think he gets it fine. He seems pretty much about the money if he stole yours. And, correct me if I am wrong but I think there are plenty of parts of Brooklyn that are about the money. Have you ever been to the Heights?

“He gets all defensive as if I did something wrong whenever I want to talk about him paying us back. It is so weird.”

Weird? Sounds kind of psychopathic to me.

And this is my fave of all:

“I told him he needs to learn that going to school is better than stealing and dealing drugs.”

Ya think? What the hell!

I was told today that people sense my being and then they perform for me so I can blog about it. Could that actually be true? Could I be a cosmic magnet for the absurd?

Haven’t had enough of me yet? You can also read me at 50-Something Moms Blog. For photo enthusiasts, visit Leaving the zip code, photos from outside the comfort zone

add to del.icio.us : Add to Blinkslist : add to furl : Digg it : add to ma.gnolia : Stumble It! : add to simpy : seed the vine :  :  : TailRank : post to facebook


Filed under absurdities, conversations, humor, things i've heard, travel, women