Yes, I am back in the Sunshine State, and I use that term loosely this season.
This is a billboard as you get out of the airport towards I95. Nothing like making the tourists feel at home as soon as they arrive.
Stay tuned for more stories.
Haven’t had enough of me yet? You can also read me at 50-Something Moms Blog. For photo enthusiasts, visit Leaving the zip code, photos from outside the comfort zone.
Filed under absurdities, carry a camera, humor, road signs, signage, travel
If you have been reading along these past few days you would know that I took a trip to Florida to see my parents with my brother. We left our spouses home. And our kids? Well, they aren’t kids anymore so they have their own lives and we can’t lure them places with pool noodles and water wings. Although the promise of a good ice cream sandwich and free drinks at happy hour might get them to join us.
This was a bit of a last minute trip for me and I am so glad I took it. I can count on my hand the times in the past 25 years that it has just been the 4 of us. And sadly I would have to say most of those times were not surrounding very pleasant circumstances. Don’t get me wrong, we adore having our spouses and families with us, as do our parents. But there is something very special about going back to the original family unit of your childhood for a short time. My husband did it earlier this season (well 4 of his original 5 made it) and he too, appreciated having that historical dynamic.
This was the first extended period of time that we were able to just hang out and enjoy each other’s company. For so many years our interactions centered around the kids. Our professional lives are very demanding and leave us little time to just be. Lost were the days that we could sit at a table uninterrupted and have a complete conversation. This weekend was a gift of healthy (well except for mom’s 24 hour bug) parents and time to enjoy them.
With the backdrop of South Florida’s planned communities as never ending fodder for humor we had a lot of laughs.
Funny, we sat in the back seat of my dad’s car in our childhood positions. Fortunately we did not bicker. Since my brother is 4 1/2 years older I never did stand a chance in a fight and always wound up crying or having a nose bleed (don’t ask).
Times like this are a breeding ground for childhood memories. We talked of things that were long forgotten. The simple thrill of going to work with my dad when we were kids; the smell of the subway, the pretzels on the street, the chestnuts, eating lunch at the Automat, going to Kresge’s Five and Dime to buy junk. My dad was the original Bring Your Child to Work Day guy. And not just my brother, he expected the same from me as he did from his son; no double standard in our house. We talked about my mom’s garden (and the gardener, G-d help that poor man) and how excited she is to get back to nurturing her plants.
We discussed family holidays when we were kids and how my grandmother used to bring Jordan Almonds, jellied fruit slices and Dunkin’ Donuts to our house. Beach days with the children when they were babies, and how they have all grown up to be such amazing young adults.
These are the little things that make up a life. Nothing truly monumental (although some would beg to differ about the Jordan Almonds), just the details that give us all history; lives made up not of days, but of moments.
Thanks Mom and Dad, not only for a lovely weekend, but for teaching us how to be parents. And giving us the gift of your time – whenever we have needed you.
Happy Passover (and pass me a tissue, please).
Oh and if you are all wondering, yes, that is my brother’s Bar Mitzvah picture. Cute wasn’t I? (in a mousey sort of way). Looks like something straight out of A Serious Man.
Haven’t had enough of me yet? You can also read me at 50-Something Moms Blog. For photo enthusiasts, visit Leaving the zip code, photos from outside the comfort zone.
Filed under aging parents, family, parenting, Time to Cry Tuesdays, travel
Florida: Day 4 and leaving.
I thought I would wrap this one up with some funny things that were said or seen over the weekend. But first I would like to give a big shout out WHAT THE HELL to the two women who just sat behind me in the Jet Blue terminal at PBI. I am an hour early for my flight because I love airports my brother’s flight was earlier and I am literally one of 4 people at the gate. These two blabbermouths had to sit in the seats directly behind me and yack away…
in a foreign language. SERIOUSLY!
Ok, so here are some of the funnier things from the weekend:
My Aunt: My mother told me that she loved my father more after he was dead.
My Cousin: While playing a game with all the grandmothers when they were still with us (this was the generation of my grandmother) in response to body parts that come in pairs my Aunt’s mother (from above) responded, “Penis” This could explain why she stayed with her husband for so many years, even if she loved him more after he was dead.
My Mom: (in response to my dad saying that I had a great sense of humor) Yeh, especially when it comes to poo. (ok, my brother and I discuss bodily functions maybe a little bit more than average siblings).
My Dad: You have to understand all our weather comes from the West. It comes in from the Gulf of Mexico. That means we get used weather.
For a nice little wrap up, here are three of my favorite signs:
1. This billboard sits outside the road leading to my parents’ community. I believe it is placed there just in case all the Northerners of ‘the tribe’ had any questions about His existence.
2. This Derm seems to cover it all. Permanant make-up? WTF? What if you want to change color. Is it like the mood ring material? And would you really trust someone with your skin cancer that does permanent makeup? Just asking?
3. I will close with the creepy child mannequin and the miracle suit poster, just because this says so much.
In closing, I will quote a dear friend who said this about visiting Florida, “just remember that you are watching a movie in which you will play the LEADING role some time in the future.”
My answer to that is, “I only pray I will be so lucky.”
Thanks Mom and Dad for a great visit. And Keith, no one makes me laugh quite like you.
Let the Matzoh begin!
Haven’t had enough of me yet? You can also read me at 50-Something Moms Blog. For photo enthusiasts, visit Leaving the zip code, photos from outside the comfort zone.
Filed under aging parents, family, religion, road signs, things i've heard, travel
Have you ever found yourself on the Cross Bronx Expressway when it is at a complete standstill?
That’s a joke. If you are from NY you know that the Cross Bronx Expressway is ALWAYS at a complete standstill and you avoid it at all costs. Except when you are a completely happy-to-be-out-of-the-basement idiot listening to your ipod at 10, while you are driving on a painfully glorious 60 degree almost-spring-you-can-taste-it sort of day like today. Then you mistakenly take the Throgs Neck Bridge instead of the Triboro to the Harlem River Drive when you are going to Jersey and you find yourself smack in the middle of the worst 10 mile stretch of road in the universe! Or at least the east coast because I think all of Southern California is probably the equivalent of the Cross Bronx only with better scenery.
So there I am.
Stuck between 4 tractor trailors.
And I have to pee.
Like, so bad that it seems a waste not to have to go for a sonogram with a bladder that full. (inside joke for those who know about having to take a pelvic sono). Only I could bring the word ‘pelvic’ into a post about traffic and trucking. Yeh, I know, part of my charm.
So, to amuse myself, and to take my mind off of the fact that my bladder was very likely going to burst any moment, I pulled out my camera and started to find things to take pictures of. What? You don’t do that?
Well, lucky for me that I had that camera because somewhere around exit 5 this red truck pulls up alongside me with my last name on it!! (ok, maiden name but I use it for blogging and work so it counts). Thanks Zimmerman Truck Lines for truckin’ my blues away. (ok, painfully corny, sorry)
I took it as a sign that I was meant to be there at that moment.
Huh? Whatever, just humor me.
Haven’t had enough of me yet? You can also read me at 50-Something Moms Blog. For photo enthusiasts, visit Leaving the zip code, photos from outside the comfort zone.
Filed under absurdities, carry a camera, cars, companies, humor, New York, New York City, road trip, travel
I know, you all saw that title and thought, “How sweet, she is going to praise the virtues of her sweet Gary of Hey Nanny Nanny and Janie Knight fame.” Well, of course he is the perfect husband, but this post is not about him.
For those who have been following along, my daughter Jana is doing a semester abroad. That is college-speak for I will tolerate a few hours a week of class so I can be in a different city (sometimes two) every weekend. This weekend found her in Amsterdam, with a side trip to Brussels. When she is traveling I usually wake up to a BBM (blackberry messenger message – it’s like a text for you non-crackberry heads). This morning I found this photo with no message. It was hard to read on my bberry so I had to email it to myself to see what it was.
If there was any doubt that I was genetically linked to this girl you will now understand that I would have to be her mother. Ahhh, the Inflatable Perfect Husband. This must be the 20-year-old version of the Grow Your Own Parents that I bought her in middle school when we were getting on her last nerve. I particularly like the french word for inflatable… gonflable. How do you pronounce that? Anyone? I took Spanish so it is lost on me but I love the way it looks.
I shudder to think what the Inflatable Perfect Wife has behind her back.
Haven’t had enough of me yet? You can also read me at 50-Something Moms Blog. For photo enthusiasts, visit Leaving the zip code, photos from outside the comfort zone.
Filed under absurdities, carry a camera, gary, humor, Jana, travel
Ok, I admit it. I have fallen hopelessly in love. No, don’t worry, I am not leaving my adorable husband. This love affair is with ‘Nawlins, my friends. And what better day to blog about it from the rooftops, if you will, than on Fat Tuesday? So for this week, Time to Cry Tuesday will be replaced with No Time, in celebration of Mardi Gras.
If you have been following along here at i could cry, you would know that I have become quite infatuated with all things New Orleans. Hating to be cliché and ride the post-Superbowl wave, but timing is everything. At the same time that the Saints took center stage I visited The Big Easy for the first time. And I am still trying to figure out how I could live 50(ouch) years without ever visiting a place that is so aligned with my essence.
The season of New Orleans has come, and who deserves it more. The spirit of the place has survived one of the worst natural disasters on American soil, and it still comes bubbling up, sticking it’s tongue out with a big wide drunken grin screaming ‘ain’t nobody gonna beat dem Saints – who dat, who dat!”
When we visited, the streets could spontaneously break out into song and a turn down a little alleyway could bring us upon the most spectacularly off beat gallery. A place truly built on art and music, this town is irreverent, ballsy, and quirky. And even better, it seems to not put all that much value on botox, brands or bank accounts. Um, does this sound like anyone to you guys? Are you starting to see the resemblance?
This past Saturday night we had a blast at the 4th Annual Nolafunk Mardi Gras Ball at Le Poissin Rouge on Bleeker Street. We went to see Bonerama perform but loved Tab Benoit as well. I am sure Big Sam’s Funky Nation was just as– well – funky, but a few hours of 95° heat, dancing, singing and crowds was enough for us.
I stood near the stage with those horns blowing, behind the world’s oldest hippie, the costumed characters marching through the crowds, feeling like this mass of humanity was one big living breathing party organism and it was impossible to not fall madly in love. Somewhere around the second chorus of Aiko I lost my voice and could not care less.
The thing about the New Orleans culture is that it is all-inclusive. The crowd at this show was not one of posers, or rockers, blues guys or jazz aficianodos, these people were not skinny or fat, young or old… this was a crowd of EVERY SINGLE ONE OF THEM. There is something about that music that brings everyone together in one place for one reason and one reason only – to have an amazing time. To love life even when it sucks. To get out there and feel the joy of the music no matter what your troubles are when you leave. Not just survivors, but more soldiers of feel good.
I suppose if I were asked what city I would most want to be, I might just have to say New Orleans.
Haven’t had enough of me yet? You can also read me at 50-Something Moms Blog. For photo enthusiasts, visit Leaving the zip code, photos from outside the comfort zone.
Filed under holidays, Time to Cry Tuesdays, travel
We often take for granted how small the world has become. Our kids consider the technology that enables constant communication to be a given. Ichat, videochat, skype, texting, IM, bbm, facebook, twitter; these all make email seem like snail mail to them. They lose their ability to disappear but I think the trade-off seems worth it to them.
Access. All the time. Sometimes good, sometimes bad.
This post is about the good. Ok, so if you read me regularly you are not surprised that I would focus on the positive aspect of technology. But as a parent in the year 2010, with a daughter situated quite comfortably in Spain, technology is the greatest friggin’ thing on this earth.
Last night we had our first video chat with Jana since she left almost 2 weeks ago. You might imagine that this would have been about really important stuff. Well it was, sort of. For instance, we got to see the way her bathroom light turns on ‘all freaky’. And then she whispered ‘the boy’ into the computer screen as her spanish roommate came by and asked her a question. We got to wave hello to her other roommates and get a tour of her apartment. We talked about everything and nothing with her. Better than IM or texting, this was my kid with all her subtleties and nuances; her humor and expressions. The essence of who she is.
On the laptop screen.
On the dining room table.
As if she was there.
Now I know this is no big revelation. For the past few years this has become commonplace. But damn! I am a mom with a kid on the other side(ish) of the world and I can sit in the dining room and bullshit with her as if she were right here.
And it’s free!
C’mon, how cool is that?
Haven’t had enough of me yet? You can also read me at 50-Something Moms Blog.For photo enthusiasts, visit Leaving the zip code, photos from outside the comfort zone.
Filed under Jana, technology, Time to Cry Tuesdays, travel
If you have been reading along you know that my daughter left for semester abroad last week. I cannot put into words how wonderful it was to have her home this last month. The teenager that went off to college is long gone and a lovely, grounded, charming young woman came home in her place. She is all grown up.
Well, almost.
The day she was leaving I came upstairs to check on her last minute packing. There I found her carry-on in the hallway. And tucked away in between the hair mousse and the laptop, strapped in tight, was Chetley. Her main man since birth. Yes we realize ‘he’ is dressed in pink, many shades and patterns of it as a matter of fact as I have reconstructed his body on more than one occasion in the past 20 years.
If you know Jana personally, you surely know the Chetmeister. He has been through it all with her, the good and the bad. He sat perched on her bed at camp, from the first day as a nine-year-old to the last day as Senior Group Leader. When she was a frightened five-year-old going into the hospital for neurosurgery to ‘get her neck fixed’, good old Chet went with her and sported a bandage on the back of his neck till her stitches came out. He proudly went off to college with her… this bear is a Badger through and through. And if I am not mistaken, Jew that he is, I think he even followed along on Birthright to Israel last summer. All that considered I don’t know why I imagined he would stay behind while she embarked on the adventure of her lifetime.
I truly had this whole going abroad thing under control all along. Gary and I are both so happy that she is able to have this experience. Many parents asked me if I was sad or nervous about her going. I am surely neither. I love her wings and the fact that she loves to use them.
But standing there at the top of the stairs, hours before we left for the airport, the sight of that teddy bear with his arm around the laptop just about did me in. Jana then and now just flashed before my eyes. Right in front of the door she slammed so often as a preteen that the latch is loose, sat the evidence that she was all grown up; and not completely – all at one moment.
They call them comfort items. The stuffed animals or blankets that children form an attachment to and use to self-soothe when they are young. Why has no one invented a comfort item for the moms when they find themselves in a moment like this.
Oh, that’s right, they call that VODKA!
Haven’t had enough of me yet? You can also read me at 50-Something Moms Blog. For photo enthusiasts, visit Leaving the zip code, photos from outside the comfort zone.
Filed under camp, college, Jana, Time to Cry Tuesdays, travel
The day my daughter was born I held her in my arms, looked into her eyes and thought, ‘Damn I hope she grows up to be a blogger someday’.
Ok, perhaps 20 years ago there was no such thing as a blogger. Come to think of it there was no mainstream internet to speak of. But I was a visionary.
Today, I am proud to announce my daughter has started her first blog. It will chronicle her semester abroad in Sevilla, Spain. Yes I am thrilled that she embraced the idea of blogging and yes, I am jealous as hell.
She is funny (not just because I am her mom, she really is), and she already gave me a shout out in her first post. Since she has sufficiently sucked up – and because I am her mom – I thought that it was my duty to give her some link love. You can find her at Jaña en España (cute, right?).
Hop on over and show her some love.
Haven’t had enough of me yet? You can also read me at 50-Something Moms Blog. For photo enthusiasts, visit Leaving the zip code, photos from outside the comfort zone.
You have to love a street artist with a sense of humor. Great marketing, this guy really broke the clutter on a strip in New Orleans where you couldn’t walk down the street without tripping over people trying to draw your portrait. (and psychics, more street psychics per square block than I have ever seen).
In case you can’t read the small type on the top sign under “Ugly People One Dollar Extra”, it reads “So Hurry – Get your caricature NOW (before the UGLY sets in).
Now the butt sketch? It was tempting. And with the way my boy wears his pants these days he would only have to lift his shirt for them to get a full view.
This is my kind of town!
Haven’t had enough of me yet? You can also read me at 50-Something Moms Blog. For photo enthusiasts, visit Leaving the zip code, photos from outside the comfort zone.
Filed under absurdities, art, body image, college touring, danny, travel
i could cry but i don't have time 