Category Archives: humor

May 8, 2010 · 11:15 pm

All I Want for Mother’s Day is a New Spatula

The scene: Friday morning, making Danny’s lunch (yes I still make him lunch and my days are numbered with this so get off my case)

The Dog: decides to puke up her entire breakfast in the middle of the kitchen floor.

Me: Gary, can you clean up the dog puke please.

Gary: Sure (as he grabs the above spatula, scoops it into a paper towel and tosses it very efficiently).

Now, let me confess that I did not really process this at all until a bit later in the day when I was texting with Jana and told her and she was appalled.

Then she informed me her friends were all equally appalled.

Then I told her Gary wanted to make her an omelette when she gets home from Europe. (I can be a pot stirrer at times)

Then I mentioned it on the lacrosse field and EVERYONE was appalled. In fact one friend said she would never come over for breakfast while another said she was not sure she would ever come over at all.

But the best of all is when Danny came over and we told him.

And he almost gagged because he had just used that spatula to make himself breakfast.

Hey, don’t be so disgusted, it had gone through the dishwasher!

Hey, Happy Mother’s Day everyone.

Haven’t had enough of me yet? You can also read me at 50-Something Moms Blog. For photo enthusiasts, visit Leaving the zip code, photos from outside the comfort zone.

5 Comments

Filed under danny, family, gary, humor, Jana

Tagged as , ,

May 5, 2010 · 7:30 pm

Drink No Evil?

Not if these guys can help it. I love when wine labels are clever. (remember Mommy’s Time Out)

These guys make mention of how ‘evil’ backwards is ‘live’ but I am not quite sure how turning the label upside down gives us that message.

Oh right, maybe it is subliminal.

Nonetheless I think this would make a lovely hostess gift…

and depending upon where you are eating, maybe it can be subliminal.

Haven’t had enough of me yet? You can also read me at 50-Something Moms Blog.For photo enthusiasts, visit Leaving the zip code, photos from outside the comfort zone.

4 Comments

Filed under carry a camera, humor, marketing, products

Tagged as , ,

May 4, 2010 · 6:23 pm

May is Zombie Awareness Month

Really?

Really. I know, where do I find this stuff?

I think I probably first saw this on twitter but I did a little research and came across, what else, the Zombie Research Society website (no joke). I love their tagline:

What you don’t know can eat you.® (yes this is a registered trademark)

It would appear that May is the month when some of the most famous zombie movies take place (think Night of the Living Dead series), so this is the most likely month for zombie awareness (um, ok).

Here are the Society’s three foundational principles (with my commentary):

  1. A zombie is a biologically definable, animated being occupying a human corpse. (my sister-in-law told me she knows a few people that fit that description – yikes!)
  2. The zombie pandemic is coming. It’s not a matter of if, but a matter of when (this sounds pretty definitive to me – I am leaning towards being concerned).
  3. Enthusiastic debate about zombies is essential to the survival of the human race (sorry, I find this one to be a bit of a stretch – you?)

If you are interested you can buy their merch here. I am thinking the t-shirt might make a nice father’s day present for my husband.

Haven’t had enough of me yet? You can also read me at 50-Something Moms Blog.For photo enthusiasts, visit Leaving the zip code, photos from outside the comfort zone.

4 Comments

Filed under absurdities, conversations, current events, humor, magnet for the absurd, twitter

Tagged as , ,

May 1, 2010 · 8:12 pm

Snitches…

… end up in ditches.

Oh my. Saw this guy at the beach today and almost had second thoughts about snapping this shot for fear that I too, could find myself in a ditch. Something tells me this guy would not be too fond of me posting his picture.

But since his face is not showing and this is simply too perfect a picture not to blog about I am going to live on the edge, go out on a limb and hopefully not find myself in a ditch.

Why did I feel a little bit like I was in a Sopranos episode.

Sorry, vivid imagination.

Haven’t had enough of me yet? You can also read me at 50-Something Moms Blog.For photo enthusiasts, visit Leaving the zip code, photos from outside the comfort zone.

14 Comments

Filed under carry a camera, humor, t-shirts

Tagged as , , , ,

April 30, 2010 · 11:30 pm

Nonpariel

Friends served these at a dinner party tonight. They were a big hit.

But the question immediately came up, “If these are nonpariels, what are… pariels?”

Sorry, that’s all I got tonight kids.

Haven’t had enough of me yet? You can also read me at 50-Something Moms Blog.For photo enthusiasts, visit Leaving the zip code, photos from outside the comfort zone.

3 Comments

Filed under absurdities, humor

Tagged as , ,

April 22, 2010 · 10:16 pm

Soup Dog

I am pretty tired and suffering from a little bit of social media overload today so I thought in celebration of my girl Ginger coming back for another weekend visit tomorrow I would simply post a little vid of her eating chicken soup from a spoon the last time she was here for no other reason than every time I watch this I laugh till I cry (but I don’t have time).

Damn I love a good run on sentence, don’t you?

Enjoy!

Haven’t had enough of me yet? You can also read me at 50-Something Moms Blog. For photo enthusiasts, visit Leaving the zip code, photos from outside the comfort zone.

5 Comments

Filed under absurdities, carry a camera, family, home video, humor, movies, pets

Tagged as

April 21, 2010 · 11:25 pm

Subway Etiquette Posters

Now this is something I wish I had thought of. Kind of like your mother telling you how to behave before you ride the subway. Thanks to The Daily What and a tweet from my idol, @guykawasaki, I found these and just had to share. For all of us who have ridden the NYC subway system for years, this is a breath of fresh air.

From the Daily What:

Jason Shelowitz is presently in the process of posting 400 “Service Changes”-themed Subway Etiquette posters on behalf of the “Metropolitan Etiquette Authority” on trains throughout the city. He encourages subway patrons to keep an eye out for them and take them “before the MTA does.”

Too lazy to click the links? Basic story is that this guy surveyed 100 people about their pet peeves in the subway and created these posters to try to build some awareness and get people to behave better.

Kinda wishing that the guy on the F train in 1982 when I commuted from Forest Hills had read the physical contact one. I am still skeeved out by him. And the religious ranters? Seriously, must I listen to that AND be stuck next to the smelly guy and the not so noise cancelling ipod boy at the same time?

Looking forward to hearing more about these. If any of you spot one please snap a shot and send me the location. Would like to track how this works.

Haven’t had enough of me yet? You can also read me at 50-Something Moms Blog. For photo enthusiasts, visit Leaving the zip code, photos from outside the comfort zone.

4 Comments

Filed under carry a camera, current events, humor, marketing, signage

Tagged as , , , , , ,

April 15, 2010 · 10:51 pm

A Big Florida Welcome

Yes, I am back in the Sunshine State, and I use that term loosely this season.

This is a billboard as you get out of the airport towards I95. Nothing like making the tourists feel at home as soon as they arrive.

Stay tuned for more stories.

Haven’t had enough of me yet? You can also read me at 50-Something Moms Blog. For photo enthusiasts, visit Leaving the zip code, photos from outside the comfort zone.

2 Comments

Filed under absurdities, carry a camera, humor, road signs, signage, travel

Tagged as , , ,

April 15, 2010 · 1:01 am

The Bulgarian Bar

The Bulgarian Bar is NOT upstairs.

I, for one, was quite relieved by this signage.

Apparently they have a problem with thirsty Bulgarians.

What was upstairs was a fabulous, tragically hip (which we are not) asian fusion tapas (any other groovy name you can think of to describe it) restaurant called Kuma Inn. (113 Ludlow Str, NYC)

Great food, great service, reasonable prices and lovely bathroom with lots of candles.

And SO not a Bulgarian Bar.

Haven’t had enough of me yet? You can also read me at 50-Something Moms Blog. For photo enthusiasts, visitLeaving the zip code, photos from outside the comfort zone.

2 Comments

Filed under carry a camera, humor, New York City, photography, places of interest, signage

Tagged as , ,

April 11, 2010 · 9:32 pm

1 in 499

Today I bring you a little story about the absurdity of the area in which I live. Some of you may know of it as the Gold Coast, made famous by the Nelson Demille book of the same name. Don’t be fooled, the entire area is not like this, there are plenty of normal neighborhoods and the community I live in was a great place to raise a family.

But!  Part of raising a family here is to keep them grounded in the midst of some crazy money. Silly money really. Silly money sitting next to regular families like ours. My friend Twentyfour at Heart writes about the LA version of this life and she refers to it as moneytown. Well, 24, you will love this story!

Enter the story of the red Ferraris. We were in a shopping center nearby – buying sneakers of all glamorous things – and we ran into some friends we have not seen in a long time. We started to chat in the parking lot when we saw a red Ferrari F430 16M Scuderia Spider parked with the license plate 1 in 499 (yes, I am miserable that I did not get a shot of that). Wow, a little research tells me that sucker sells for around $220,000 and in fact only 499 of them were produced.

Yeh, that’s not nuts. I mean, shouldn’t it come with 3 bedrooms and some major appliances for that price? Ok, so wow. This guy is really loaded. Or he is in a lot of debt. Or he wants us to think he has a really big dick (most likely).

So, we chat,chat, chat a bit more and then my friend says, “Oh boy, Mr. 1 in 499 is going to be really pissed off, here comes another car just like his.” Yep, that’s right. There we were in a parking lot with not one but TWO of these cars. As we wondered where the other 497 of them were residing you would never believe this but a THIRD one drove into the lot.

Ok, that is just crazy. Funny money. There we were in the midst of $660,000 worth of red Ferraris revving their engines trying to get their 3 dicks to be as big as they were when they left their driveways that morning.

And you know what? I was still just happy to have a new pair of kicks.

Haven’t had enough of me yet? You can also read me at 50-Something Moms Blog. For photo enthusiasts, visit Leaving the zip code, photos from outside the comfort zone.

12 Comments

Filed under absurdities, communities, humor

Tagged as , , , , , ,