Monthly Archives: April 2011

April 17, 2011 · 11:33 pm

Mini Giraffe is the New Teacup Pig

Have you seen this commercial? The one with the mini giraffe on the treadmill? If not, you are surely under a rock. It’s for Direct TV and I swear if they could promise me one of these critters I would sign up for almost anything. I have been meaning to write about this for ages.

The commercial could go down in history as being one of the most annoying pieces of advertising ever produced. The premise is stupid, the main character is as irritating as they come and I will not even begin to go into the sexist way in which the women are portrayed because, hey, this is about mini giraffes and that would be a buzz kill. But it sticks, and that is the whole point.

There on the right side of the screen is this mini giraffe on a treadmill that has captured the hearts of all who see it. Without the giraffe this spot would just be another stupid commercial that you would probably flip the channel to avoid. But the giraffe… she makes it one you look forward to seeing and you tolerate the idiot Russian to do so.

In a stroke of genius and some really solid social integration strategy, they created a website for Sokoblovsky Farms, Russia’s Finest Purveyors of Petite Lap Giraffes. On the home page is a giraffe-cam. It does not get better than this. The whole site is written in a Russian accent and is stupid, yet endearing. This is my favorite picture.

When you go to this page you can click on the ‘I Want a Giraffe’ button which told me I was 915,499 on the wait list and gave me the opp to… you guessed it, share the news on facebook and twitter.

Gary is convinced that 915,498 of the people think these mini giraffes really exist.

Wait, they don’t?

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April 15, 2011 · 6:37 pm

The Good Bus

Oh yeh, I SO want to ride the good bus. I mean, who wouldn’t? I saw this parked in a lot on 49th and 11th and had to snap a pic.

So here’s the deal on the good ole Good Bus. They operate out of Vermont and throughout the northeast. They have a regular schedule from VT to NYC and you can also book them for private parties. They welcome bachelor/bachelorette parties (I assume there is an upholtstery cleaning surchage).

So, my friends, when you are having a bad day, consider taking a ride on the Good Bus (yeh, I know, that should be their tagline)

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April 13, 2011 · 12:22 am

Baby Snowglobe

I find this both charming and creepy at the same time. Tucked in between a traditional snowglobe and 2 over excited high-fiving buddah bookends was this fairly old specimen. This particular thrift shop sold everything from furniture to… well to snowglobes.

Why I did not buy it is beyond me. Hell, it was only four bucks (note to self: must go back and purchase this).

What always gets me when I see something like this is what on earth was going on in the mind of its creator. ‘Yeh, so lets make this snowglobe. And we can put this sort of really creepy smiling baby with no nose in it. And it can be crawling away from this pink elephant while sort of looking out of the glass in a longing way. And right in front of it we can put a duck with one leg who has its eyes closed. And then in the background, just for shits and giggles, lets but a palm tree and maybe a bunny and some messed up blue thing that might be a whale. Yeh, this will be a great baby gift for…’

the criminally insane, maybe?

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April 12, 2011 · 1:00 am

Time to Cry Tuesday – Sugar Magnolia

” Sugar magnolia, blossoms blooming, heads all empty and I don’t care…”

It was that kind of day, right? Well, here in NY it was, anyway. Topping out in the 70s it was one of those early days of spring where the buds are starting to burst out into flower and you can just feel the universe shift towards gentler days. When the air has that essence of earth and growth and all that damn snow is simply a memory.

That would be, of course, if you were not tethered to the basement! Have no fear, I found a way to sneak a little of it in. Take in the mail, let out the dog, stand on the front stoop, you know… commuting for those of us who work at home. On one of these little mental health breaks I noticed my prized magnolia was starting to bloom. It’s not that this tree looks so spectacular, it is the fact that it survived at all that makes it so impressive.

Some years back, this tree died. It made me sad because it was the very tree that I would hang all the kids’ projects in when they were little. Bird feeders, wind chimes, charming little paper plates & tongue depressor mobiles slathered with tempera paint that simply had to hang proudly in front of the house for all to see. This tree had a real personality and the perfect branch from which to hang all these treasures. When it died it felt like it took the ghosts of all those sweet memories with it.

Last year I looked at the ground and saw that a shoot of the tree had started to sprout from the root ball. This season it looks like it will most probably be more of a bush than a tree, but it is flowering nonetheless. And it has a mentor across the lawn; a pear tree that was taken down by a falling willow years ago and grew back to twice its original size.

You could say this little section of the front lawn is a lot like I am…

stubborn as hell? I was thinking more a survivor – but yes – probably both.

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April 8, 2011 · 8:29 pm

Stinky Dog

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Phone rings.

Me: (as I look at the caller ID and see it is my dog groomer) No Way! Laura? Does my dog smell that bad that you are actually calling me?

Laura: Seriously, what is going on with you? The damn dog has not been here since DECEMBER!

Me: Well, actually it is really not THAT bad, I had her groomed at the vet when she went through her diabetic episode back in… oy January.

Laura: Well, ok, that is still really bad.

Me: Have the neighbors been calling you to complain?

Laura: No, but you have to get that dog in here for a bath.

Me: Ok, book her. Hmmm… do you think I need to wash her bed now?

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April 8, 2011 · 12:57 am

Set Yourself Free

Spotted on West 14th Street. Hey, for the price of an iPad you can rid yourself of that pesky spouse.

What is this world coming to?

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April 6, 2011 · 9:35 pm

Savvy Vendor – Location, Location, Location

Now here is a street vendor who has got it going on. If you look at the signage in the background, you will see that he is parked right in front of the Apple store on West 14th Street. This dude has set up shop in the ultimate location, selling all the i-accesorries you could ever need. Talk about a captive market.

We just need to help him work on his signage a little bit… not all that tasteful.

Then again, that yellow and red can’t be missed. Sometimes tacky works.

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April 5, 2011 · 6:03 pm

The Dog Ate My Computer (and other great excuses)

Of all the great excuses used over time for not handing in homework, the dog ate my computer might be up there with the best of all times. As a woman predisposed to photographing her neighbors’ garbage, this one impressed me more than most. I can’t quite figure out what went on in this house. I am equally curious and hesitant to find out the real story behind this one.

All I know is that it wasn’t Mel’s fault, she was just investigating. She actually turned around and looked at me with the ‘what the hell’ face. I had to get her in the shot because it reminded me of this great video that Emily posted last week. I am sure many of you have some 4-legged guilty parties living in your very homes that can relate.

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April 5, 2011 · 12:22 am

(Time) to Cry Tuesday

This week Time to Cry Tuesday is about… Time.

Funny, when I started this blog I had so little time; kids, husband, work, volunteering, friends, family… yadayadayada. I look back at the About Me page and realize it is way past time that I update it.

So, now the kids are in college and there should be all sorts of extra time…

NOT.

As I write this it is midnight I am still sitting at my desk and I have not showered from walking this morning. I did not go out till 7PM to run errands and that was only because we were out of meds for the dog, the husband and I. (sadly, probably in that order). Dinner was cooked and eaten at our usual 8PM, the laundry is still not folded and I am pretty sure the spring ants are going to take over the house, lift up the dog and march her right out of the kitchen if I don’t get the exterminator back here.

So… time!

Our expectations that life would get easier and time would be more plentiful at this stage went out with the funky economy and the the fact that we are simply thankful to have the work… even if we don’t get to shower before midnight. The key is to find the time, even if it is a few moments a day, to do at least one thing that you love, that’s for you, that makes you feel like you so that you don’t get lost in all that time chasing. For me it is the morning walk with the dog. No matter how busy I am that has to happen.

And if you are lucky, on Tuesday you have time to cry about it all little… and then move on. After all, you don’t want to be late.

 

 

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April 4, 2011 · 12:37 am

When Your Kids Act Bratty

I saw this card the other day in the window of a store and could not stop laughing. Why is it that people would like you better if your kids act bratty? Because it makes them feel better that you are not a superior parent? Or do people like being around bratty kids (not likely)

I am sure there is some clever little quipy response inside this card but I honestly don’t think anything that it would say anything funnier.

So the next time you see someone with a really bratty kid, consider this: Do you like them better?

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