Tag Archives: burning mouth syndrome

Top Ten Search Terms (vol.2)

I will be shamelessly self-promoting my new photo blog, leaving the zip code, here from now on. You won’t be disappointed, I promise. Let’s see if some of you will take the ‘submit’ challenge.

This one was really hard to narrow down to only 10, so I cheated and put all the tampons in as one listing. They were all too funny to leave any out.

As I did last month, I have linked these to the posts I think the search yielded:

10. petafile aroiund my neiborhood (uh, do we have a spelling issue going on here? this link is a stretch but I could not think of what else they found with that)

9. victim nail polish (I was once a victim to nail polish but I went into therapy and now I am good)

8. highway to hell photo code (wait, is there a password to get into hell?)

7. does menopause make women irrational and (Duh!! No, these hormones are not a problem sonny, just don’t come near me when I have a knife in my hand. I cannot help but wonder what came after the ‘and’…homicidal? frankly psychotic? certifiably insane? any other suggestions?)

6. mars cheerleaders (imagine the outfits they would be wearing)

5. decision ball outlook so so (this is a pretty wishy-washy magic eight ball, no?)

4. okay to drive baby in convertible? (helloooo, if you have to ask we should get your number and call social services)

3. acronym for burnt mouth from hot pizza (that would have to be BMFHP?)

2. adirondack milfs (I believe this may be an impossibility, have you ever been to the adirondacks?)

1. tampons don’t work (um, maybe you need to change it more often),  yank out tampon  (ouch, must you yank?)strategies for getting tampon out (this one should be pretty simple, did you not know that was what the string was for?) and the all time fave…

obama covered with tampons (just the visual alone is hysterical. yes I posted about this one already, so sue me)

There were a few more that I loved, but I need to be selective, right? Feel free to vote for your faves. And claim any of them if they were yours.

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Filed under absurdities, humor, search engine terms, searches, Uncategorized

Burning Mouth Syndrome?!

Yes, this is a real thing. (no that is not a picture of my actual tongue)

So of course if it is weird, I would get it, right?

A few months ago I started to have these odd symptoms like my mouth was burned. You know, like when you eat really hot pizza and you feel as if the roof of your mouth has turned to melted string cheese? (nice visual, right?).

Off I went to my dentist who gave me this speech about ‘women in their menopausal years’ yadayadayada. Another reason why menopause needs rebranding – tying all these nasty disorders to this lovely time of life. Then he comes up with an article from the Yale Taste Lab. I mean really, does this place actually exist? (it surely does) Imagine what a party it is in that place everyday. On top of menopause these Ivy League geniuses tied this to anxiety, depression, stress… the usual suspects. After all, everyone knows that women of a certain age are all crazy bee-otches, right? (husband, please do not answer that question, it was rhetorical)

I mentioned this to my new bbff (best blog friend forever) Liz, at Flashfree who had just done a post on menopause and taste. I hit send and within hours she had researched the hell out of this and done another amazing post about BMS, complete with a groovy youtube vid of the Trammps’ Disco Inferno (burn baby burn). That song NEVER gets old, does it? Thanks Liz, you rock.

Bottom line? There are all sorts of treatments. None proven.

Except of course the fact that if there is an odd symptom out there, chances are someone in my house will have it.

Ice pop, anyone?

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Filed under health, humor, women