May 5, 2009 · 8:43 pm

Llamacide

I have always had a deep affection for llamas. No, seriously. Sometime back in High School there was an episode involving sleeping on the beach in the Hamptons, a hibachi and a poncho that looked like a llama…

Never mind, you certainly had to be there. Those of you who were are laughing so hard you are crying right now, I am sure of that. I digress (as usual).

llama_inge_morath1Back to the llamas. I love them. I have this photo over my desk. It is from 1957 and was taken by  Inge Morath a wildly talented photographer. (you can see more of her images at magnumphotos.com.) I have often stared at this image late at night during a break from work and wondered how the hell she got the damn llama in that cab. Or do you think she simply happened upon this scene? (did you know they kick and spit when they are nervous?)

I did a little more research on llamas tonight and came across llama.org (not kidding) whose tagline is ‘Put a little llama in your life’ (again, not kidding). Here is a little llamamercial from their site:

Did you know llamas are affordable, fun, can pull a cart, go on a short walk or a long-trek, can be used as an investment vehicle (wait are they recession proof, I need to get me a 401L), are easy to care for, are displayed at shows throughout the US, are great with kids, can guard sheep and other livestock (this should be helpful on the North Shore of Long Island) and that their colorful fleece can be woven into durable, luxurious garments? (a poncho, perhaps?)

Anyone thinking of what to get me for my 50th birthday? Perhaps you should read the Buying Your First Llama section. Wow $3,000 – $10,000. Seriously, who wants a low-end llama, for G-d sakes?

What spawned this post and what the hell does the title mean? Check out this video I found today (along with 1 million other YouTube viewers). Yes, I know that technically Llamacide would be the killing of llamas, but it made a good title.

I don’t know why, but this video made me laugh so hard I had to share it. I must have watched it 5 times today. I hope it makes you all laugh too. Email viewers, you must click over and watch this on the blog, it is REALLY worth the click. (BTW,I am pretty sure the llama.org peops would not find this funny).

Haven’t had enough of me yet? You can also read me at 50-Something Moms Blog.

For photo enthusiasts, visit Leaving the zip code, photos from outside the comfort zone.

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May 4, 2009 · 10:28 pm

Time to Cry Tuesday – Meatloaf and Mashed Potatoes

Meatloaf Dinner

Comfort food.

Everyone has certain dishes that make them feel safe. The tastes and smells that bring you back to your mom’s dinner table and remind you of what life felt like when it was simpler. Before the deadlines and the mortgage, there was…

meatloaf and mashed potatoes. Oh, and creamed spinach. That was one of those family dinners in my house that even my brother the vegetarian could probably still get nostalgic about.

Today was Monday, literally and figuratively. It was rainy and raw. Gary had to battle a lousy commute, Danny had tons of end of semester work and I was just banging away on the keyboard in the basement all day. It was a perfect day for meatloaf and mashed potatoes. (unfortunately I did not have any creamed spinach in the house). Jana will not eat anything with the word loaf in it, so we are clear to eat this delicacy until she returns.

Funny, two people asked me what was for dinner today and when I told them, they were both jealous. Meatloaf. The universal comfort food. (nice tagline). For me it is second only to rice pudding, but I reserve that for life crisis. Meatloaf is more the everyday comfort food, rice pudding is the ‘my life is on fire’ type.

So tell me, what is your comfort food?

Haven’t had enough of me yet? You can also read me at 50-Something Moms Blog.

For photo enthusiasts, visit Leaving the zip code, photos from outside the comfort zone.

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May 3, 2009 · 7:50 pm

I’d Walk a Mile for a Camel

lawn_camel

Driving down a street in a neighboring town Danny and I came across this…

lawn camel?

Seriously, what the hell? A quiet suburban street with fairly regular homes, nothing extraordinary about this neighborhood until we saw this silver fiberglass saddled, tassled camel parked on the neatly kept front lawn.

I did a little web searching on camel symbolism and came up with this lovely interpretation of camel dreams (anyone having these lately?)

To see this beast of burden, signifies that you will entertain great patience and fortitude in time of almost unbearable anguish and failures that will seemingly sweep every vestige of hope from you. To own a camel, is a sign that you will possess rich mining property. To see a herd of camels on the desert, denotes assistance when all human aid seems at a low ebb, and of sickness from which you will arise, contrary to all expectations.

Hey, with the shape the world is in these days it is no wonder we don’t see a camel on every lawn.

Whatever happened to those garden gnomes (my grandparents had one) or the cute little family of plaster ducks crossing the lawn (my parents had these). Or Pink Flamingos for G-d sake. They were the bomb!

Lawn decor. Now that would be a great photo book for me to do…

Haven’t had enough of me yet? You can also read me at 50-Something Moms Blog.

For photo enthusiasts, visit Leaving the zip code, photos from outside the comfort zone.

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May 2, 2009 · 9:59 pm

The 6:30 Movie

For some reason I thought going to a 6:30 movie on a Saturday night was a good idea. Gary was not thrilled but went along with it.

The upside:

1. You get out early enough to go to dinner.

2. You feel extremely young.

3. Chances are you won’t know anyone there.

The downside:

1. The volume is deafening (this has to be because the projectionist is tired of people asking to have the sound turned up)

2. You have to step over someone who has a cane to get to your seats.

3. At the turning point of the movie you hear the same whisper throughout the theatre. ‘it’s the sister’ echoed from every corner of the place.

No shit, we were introduced to the sister 45 minutes ago!

The movie ended. Gary and I both said ‘It’s the sister’ at the same time and started to laugh. At which point he asked me never to request the 6:30 movie again. Seriously, this was the equivalent of the early bird special.

Crap, could my hair be turning blue?

Haven’t had enough of me yet? You can also read me at 50-Something Moms Blog.

For photo enthusiasts, visit Leaving the zip code, photos from outside the comfort zone.

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May 1, 2009 · 6:36 pm

I Saw Jesus on State Street

jesus-on-state-street

For a Jewish girl I have been writing an awful lot about Jesus lately. There was the toast tattoo in Pennsylvania, the Cheez-Its comparison at Mohonk and now this very interesting shot of two young gentleman carrying a door-sized image down State Street in Madison.

Religious zealouts of this type fascinate me. I always wonder what their agenda is. Do the truly believe they will convert others? Is it tribe pride? Or are they just plain crazy? Seriously, do you wake up one morning and say to your buddy, “Hey Bill, let’s get a big picture of Jesus Christ and stretch it on a frame. Then we can walk up and down State Street and through campus with it.” Yeh, well either that or “Let’s go get some brunch”.

Whatever, it’s harmless. And as long as no one is pushing a pamphlet in my face I am good with the act of self expression.

Plus, it makes for a great picture.

Haven’t had enough of me yet? You can also read me at 50-Something Moms Blog.

For photo enthusiasts, visit Leaving the zip code, photos from outside the comfort zone.

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April 30, 2009 · 9:25 pm

Top Ten Search Terms (Vol. 9)

untitled-1

OK kids, here we are again, my favorite post of the month. Welcome to the 9th installment of the top ten search terms. There are some great ones this month. Enjoy!

menopause irrational behavior Go figure, who would ever suspect someone in menopause of displaying irrational behavior.

menstraution tampon yes, this was misspelled. and what else, might I ask, would one use a tampon for?

snorting smarties negative effects do you think there are any positive effects? another one in this category would be: smarties naked. are smarties ever dressed?

sorry but i don’t have time for this doesn’t it make you wonder why someone who is so busy would waste their time keywording something like this into a search engine?

satan calling and how to call satan these two are a little scary. ‘who’s calling?’ Satan’ ‘Hold, on. Honey it’s for you’. I am more than a little concerned about people who are keywording the phoning of Satan.

ricky martin lunchbox was someone really looking to buy one of these? too bad I found it on the sale rack.

jesus in cheese its wait, are they now putting Jesus in every pack of Cheez its now?

meaning of live to the point of tears if this has to be explained to you then the chance of you actually experiencing it is unlikely

first:”amy” last:”zimmerman” state:”oh” why are people looking for me in Ohio

fart email subscription WOW, this one is the best ever. can you actually subscribe to farts by email?

Haven’t had enough of me yet? You can also read me at 50-Something Moms Blog.

For photo enthusiasts, visit Leaving the zip code, photos from outside the comfort zone.

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April 29, 2009 · 10:11 pm

Flesh Eating Zombies

flesh_eating_zombies

No, I am not talking about an upcoming family reunion. Families can eat your heart out but flesh? No can do.

There is a never ending supply of toys that entertain me. This was something that Gary really wanted for his office but was afraid it was too large. If only there was a mini-version.

Although the Evolving Darwin playset is still my fave (I think the fishman won my heart) this one is a close second. The dog zombie is wonderful, he even has his own blood spatters like the rest of them. The business man zombie looks a lot like the people walking down the street after they get off the commuter train in my town.

Best part?

Glow in the dark, of course.

Haven’t had enough of me yet? You can also read me at 50-Something Moms Blog.

For photo enthusiasts, visit Leaving the zip code, photos from outside the comfort zone.

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April 28, 2009 · 9:15 pm

Smile! There is no HELL

smile-there-is-no-hell

Obviously this person was not sitting at my desk today.

Just kidding.

This sign was held up right next to a group of religious fanatics when we were doing the campus tour at UW Madison. The lovely thing about this campus is that you feel as if you are smack back in the middle of the days where protesting was the norm. Actually, in Madison it IS the norm.

I loved this sign because the ones that he was next to were terribly hateful and he diffused them so well. They used words like fornicators, idolaters, adulterers, effeminate homosexuals (I suppose the butch gays were cool with them), thieves, covetous drunkards (again, those that did not covet were ok) and my favorite: swindlers.

While the zealots were shouting their hateful remarks he would hold this sign up periodically and the crowd would cheer. It was peaceful. And perfect.

Just another sunny day in the midwest.

Haven’t had enough of me yet? You can also read me at 50-Something Moms Blog.

For photo enthusiasts, visit Leaving the zip code, photos from outside the comfort zone.

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April 27, 2009 · 11:28 pm

Time to Cry Tuesday – Not Dead Yet

grateful-dead

“Look at these pictures of my son, Jerry Garcia Friedman”.

That was a comment from a women who was sitting near my friends as they waited for us to arrive at The Dead concert Saturday night at Madison Square Garden.

Can’t make this stuff up.

There were those who scoffed at the idea of seeing The Dead sans Jerry Garcia. I could have leaned towards that camp but the desire to ‘go home again’ outweighed the purist in me. Perhaps he was there in spirit in the baby pictures of that old deadhead sitting behind my friends. Or maybe, just maybe, he was channeling through Warren Haines every so often.

Let’s face it. We all have the rhythms and melodies of our adolescence. The songs that can bring a tear to our eyes our a devilish grin to our faces. For some of us (and you know who you are Karen) it is Barry Manilow. For others (who are still friends with you in spite of that) it would be the cosmic meanderings of a good Dead song.

We are a tribe of sorts. We all went our separate ways but somehow that music makes us feel better when we hear it. And for those who are fortunate to have passed the love on to our kids, the bond gets stronger.

A few observations, some mine, some quoted from others.

“A Dead show is like going to Synagogue (fill in your religious affiliation). I don’t know if I necessarily believe, but I feel like I belong there”. That was from Dave. Very profound, my friend.

“I felt like I was eating the leftovers of a really amazing meal.” This one was from my son!! He was too young to have ever seen Jerry but he had to see what was left of the band. That 4th grade teacher had it right when she called him the happy go lucky deep thinker. Anyone steals that line and I will hunt you down. Not just because I am his mother, I think that line was brilliant.

Ok, here is the part where if you are not a Grateful Dead fan you may want to get a cup of coffee and move along.

Something that is NOT ok for a set list: Albama Getaway into Dark Star (what were they thinking?). Thank goodness they did not play that on Saturday.

Starting the second set with a 35 minute space Jam (oh excuse me Rhythm Devils) into Cryptical into Other One into Born Cross-eyed into St. Stephen was a bit too much. This was all a space head’s fantasy but this crowd was bored and talking. You can do that in the middle of set but to start, not so much. Almost a solid hour of way out there, even for someone who loves the sound.

What has NOT changed about a DEAD show? Tie dye, old hippies, dread locks, clouds of pot smoke, girls in long patchwork skirts (where do they pick them up nowadays), taking an 8-year-old is still a bad idea no matter how much you want to share with your kid and even if you have the most amazing seats (second row on the side of corner stage) the biggest, dancingest guy will always sit in front of you causing you to have to stand the entire show.

What HAS changed: most people had to take out their glasses to read their tickets.

All in all, I would say for a few brief hours I did go home again. Like Dave, I don’t know why but I just felt like I belonged.

And in these times there is nothing wrong with a little comfort food for the soul.

Haven’t had enough of me yet? You can also read me at 50-Something Moms Blog.

For photo enthusiasts, visit Leaving the zip code, photos from outside the comfort zone.

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April 26, 2009 · 9:51 pm

Are We Having Fun Yet?

get-real-1071fmWell I certainly am.

As luck would have it, I was crowned the ‘Get Real Girl of the Week‘ on my new favorite radio station 107.1 FM in Minneapolis (alright so I don’t live there but we cares) My two new BFFs Liv and Colleen interviewed me for this week’s show that had the theme ‘Are We Having Fun Yet?’ (one of my favorite quotes). They found me from my 50-something Mom Blog post about a recent birthday celebration for a friend. Pretty cool, right?

You can see the blog post here. And this is the link to the get real girl of the week interview podcast. It’s a long clip but if  screw around with the slider I am about 3/4 of the way in. I need to figure out how to grab that piece of the audio out and embed it here. Till then, humor me with the effort.

Oh, and yes, I know that I used amazing 2 times in one sentence (I hate that) and of course I am aware that a NY Jewish girl speaks about twice the amount of words per minute than those who live in the Midwest.

All in all it was a blast and I can add it to my list of fun things I did this weekend.

Haven’t had enough of me yet? You can also read me at 50-Something Moms Blog.

For photo enthusiasts, visit Leaving the zip code, photos from outside the comfort zone.

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