Category Archives: religion

April 8, 2009 · 10:23 pm

Guerilla Holiday

guerilla_matzoh

No, my guests did not behave like primates. That’s the other gorilla!

A new record was set in my household this Passover. Menu writing to table in 23 hours. Pretty impressive, even for me.

There are those that cook ahead and plan for weeks. Their tables are set 2 days in advance (no Karen, I am not talking about you… specifically). Not me. I need to feel the pressure of impending guests breathing down my neck before I can move towards getting it together. Between work and social obligations there was simply no time to address this holiday (or any other, who am I kidding) before it was on fire.

In the past there have been many casualties: the year I spoiled the  chicken soup by putting hot matzoh balls into cold soup. Tip: this curdles the soup. Gary had to run to the Jewish deli for soup at the 11th hour that year. Or the time I dropped 2 dozen eggs in the driveway; very messy. But this year was pretty smooth. I did shatter both a tupperware of frozen soup (the soup survived) and one more crystal wine glass from my wedding registry (a miracle there are any left after 20-blah-blah years). Other than that is was smooth as silk.

Most important, I was surrounded by those I love. Sadly some were missing for out of state reasons, but we still had a great night.

And for the record, NO ONE cleans like Joanne!

 

Haven’t had enough of me yet? You can also read me at 50-Something Moms Blog.

For photo enthusiasts, visit Leaving the zip code, photos from outside the comfort zone.

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January 4, 2009 · 10:51 pm

Sorry Pal, this Jew is Not for Jesus

Only on i could cry but i don’t have time would a post about Jesus follow one about Childbirth Orgasms. What can I say, I have range!

As I have mentioned before, I have become a bit of a Twitter addict. For those who are unfamiliar with Twitter it is sort of a cross between a social network, like Facebook, and Instant Messaging, like AIM or ICHAT. And for my parents and in-laws, sorry about speaking in a foreign language in this post.

The other night on Twitter someone wrote that they were being followed by @jesus and they better watch what they say. I thought that was simply hysterical and ‘retweeted’ that comment. Not long after, I received an email that @jesus was now following me! The best line of all in the bio is ‘what would Jesus tweet?’

jesus-tweet

Oh Twitter – opportunities for all! This is a group of Christians trying to spread the word. Hey, G-d bless. But fellas this Jew is not for Jesus, so if you don’t mind, nothing personal but I will not follow y’all back. K?

A little further investigation tuned me in that there are many godlike twitter accounts out there in the twittosphere: @god, @jesus_christ, @baby_jesus, @almighty and there is even @thejesusgeeks and jokesandjesus.

Here is are some funny tweets I uncovered during my search: “Is it me or should @jesus have more than 13 followers?” Or how about this one, “I unfollowed @God the other night, don’t think @Jesus will help either. ; )” On Christmas, this one went out, ” @jesus, happy birthday big guy!” And my favorite one of all “Wow. @greygoosevodka is following me! F’in awesome! But it looks like I lost @jesus (*yikes).

Ok, all kidding aside here. I find this all a little off color. And kind of sticky. This has got to offend the more religious Tweeters out there. Then again, all is fair game in the world of social media I suppose. 

Oh, in case you were wondering, to give the other side equal time, @satan is on Twitter too.

Can’t make this stuff up!

Haven’t had enough of me yet? You can also read me at Mid-Century Modern Moms and at 50-Something Moms Blog.

For photo enthusiasts, visit Leaving the zip code, photos from outside the comfort zone.

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October 13, 2008 · 8:55 pm

Time to Cry Tuesday

Wow, Tuesday again? Jeez, I could cry but I don’t have….

Ok, that was lame. Sorry.

I thought a lot about what belonged here this week. Since the last TtCT I have spent a lot of time with family and community for the Jewish holidays. This time of year leaves us Jews all sorts of reflective.

I could have written about the moving sermons given by our clergy (fabulous, actually). Or some of the touching moments with my family. Or how hard it is to have a holiday without our dear sweet Jana-girl. (there we all go, tears are starting).

But there was one incident that stood out this week for me. I have already shared it with a few of you so if you want to go get a cup of coffee now and come back tomorrow I will understand.

On Yom Kippur evening I was near the entrance of the synagogue greeting congregants. (Over-volunteer job #10,000: Synagogue Board Member). An elderly gentleman that I have known for many years came into the lobby with his tie undone. He has not been well for the past few years yet he always makes the effort to attend services. He looked agitated and was asking if we had seen his friend who he asked for by name. With kindess and grace a man I was standing with gently guided this man off to the side and offered to help him with his tie. He had a calming way of helping him with the dignity and compassion that he deserved.

The beautiful thing about this story is that the helper was not someone I would have expected this from. This was a genuine gesture of caring that was so in the spirit of the holiday that it took my breath away. Just a simple act of kindness that made all the difference to someone who has suffered so much.

People will surprise you.

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October 8, 2008 · 11:37 pm

Eat. Starve. Eat.

Ok, so like many of my blog friends, I vowed never to write about religion and politics. And here I am following up a political post with a religious one.

Never say never.

For those of you who are practicing Jews, right about now you are starting to get that morning rumble in the stomach. Hey, and what are you doing ready blogs and checking email on Yom Kippur? Oh right, you are Reform!

Ari Gold school of prayer?

For my non-Jewish readers, today is Yom Kippur, the holiest day in the Jewish religion. Ahh…. now you understand why there was less traffic this morning. (well, that really depends on where you live I suppose). We Jews fast for 24 hours. But first we eat like crazy. Then when we are done, we eat like crazy again.

I was thinking how ironic it was for a people who are so tied to food to have to give it up for a day to atone. Think about it. Jewish moms and chicken soup. Someone dies, bring those little white boxes of cookies to the Shiva house. Or for close friends…’who’s in charge of the food’. Someone takes ill, ‘who’s taking care of their dinners?’ Depressed… eat chocolate. Wait that last one is probably universal and somehow tied to estrogen levels.

The Christians might have a better idea: Lent. Instead of giving up everything for one day, they give up one thing for forty. Not so bad. And they don’t get headaches or go through caffeine withdrawals.

Enough nonsense. For those who are, have an easy fast. For those who are not, please have a cup of coffee and think of your poor blog friend jonesing for some joe.

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September 29, 2008 · 10:42 pm

Time to Cry Tuesday: Keeping the Faith

For those of you who are Jewish, L’shana Tovah. For those of you who are not, that translates into: don’t forget to take a Pepcid before you start your holiday meal and don’t worry you should never be forced to eat gefilte fish if it grosses you out. Oh, and of course it is the day that every mother of a boy scrambles from friend to friend trying to find a pair of pants that are not up to their teenage son’s ankles.

Just kidding, this is how we wish each other a happy new year. Rosh Hashanah, which began at sundown Monday night, is the Jewish New Year. I always thought it was kind of cool to start a holiday at sundown. And it makes for such great traffic stress on the Long Island Expressway, doesn’t it?

All kidding aside, in the midst of all the turmoil our country has found itself in these days, it is a wonder anyone can still keep the faith. Whatever your religion, if you take comfort in the rituals it surely helps to ease the anxiety of the times.

I am not a particularly religious person, but I am one that holds strong to my heritage and the traditions that are tied to it. To me, religion is about family and friends. And I try my best to keep the faith against all odds.

The fact that I can set a table and know that both my parents AND both my in-laws will be sitting down to a holiday meal with us is truly a blessing. Don’t get me wrong, we are all crazy in our own ways and that surely makes for some lively discussion, but how many teenagers can say that they have 4 living grandparents? Not many. Over the past few years we have had some holidays with one or another family member sadly absent from the table and hospitalized for a host of reasons. Thankfully this is not one of those years.

As a kid, going to services was torture for me. I am sure my kids feel that way today. Although I wonder now that Jana is so far away if she would not secretly rather be in the building. Ok, maybe just at the table for the home cooked meal is more realistic, but maybe not. Both kids are so comfortable there.

Now when I walk into the synagogue I am taken by the power of sitting within the community that I raised my children. This is the building where we have celebrated happy times and grieved sad ones, where the kids went to pre-school, became b’nai mitzvah. I see the all the faces and through them gauge the time I have spent here. I feel very fortunate to live in a place where people care so deeply for one another.

These have been wonderful years. I have made friendships that I could not think of living without. People who have seen me through my darkest days and who understood my warped ways and love me anyway.

With all my talk of the need to leave the zip code, when it comes down to it…

there’s no place like home.

(toto/mel, i don’t think we are in kansas anymore…)

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August 9, 2008 · 11:35 pm

Do Hare Krishna take a day off?

Sitting on the beach today, we were behind this man with an intriguing hairstyle. I mean no disrespect as am truly tolerant of all cultures. But this one had me baffled. There was much speculation about it. Was this a rat tail of the 80’s, tied up for the sun and surf? But what was with the shaved sides of the head? It was kind of a cool look but we needed answers.

Then it came to us. Maybe he was a Hare Krishna on a day off.

He could very well have left the airport, robe and bells behind for a little fresh air.

Hmmm… maybe I had a little too much sun today.

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