Category Archives: friendship

May 12, 2009 · 10:22 pm

Blogaversary

blogaversary

Believe it or not, my friends, today marks my one year blogaversary. Yes, I have been banging away here on the the keyboard for a full year, trying to make you all laugh. I look back on my first post and still consider it one of my best: Spanx, Dunkin Donuts and the fear of YouTube. I had no idea what this crazy blog would become. Oddly that first post set the tone and made me realize that my life can be funny sometimes.

I hardly remember life before blogging. Everything seems like it should be a post. Sad, funny, poignant, disgusting, it is all blogworthy.

I think what this blog has done most for me, is made me walk the walk of its mission; to laugh, sometimes to the point of tears.

Face it, life is hard, and we all get cranky… A LOT. Those who know me well hear me kvetch on a regular basis. But this is the place I come to at the end of every day to force myself to see the humorous side of things. No matter how down I get, the idea of a big box of shut the hell up will always get a laugh out of me. Sometimes the topics are ones where you would never find humor, like aging parents. Other times it is just the theatre of the absurd, like the Freakatorium, because that is the best place to escape.

Hey, without this blog I would never have been the Minneapolis fm107.1 Get Real Girl of the Week. A thrill no woman should be denied.

As a little gift to myself I submitted the word blogaversary to Urban Dictionary. If approved this will join my other words there: bloganoia, psuedosnarky, twitobirth, twirgin and twexpert. Yes, it is an odd hobby but someone has to do it. Why? I don’t know, but someone does.

I want to thank all of you that read me so loyally. Those I know in real life, and those I have met through this space. Social media has combined my two faves, connecting with people and technology. I was a natural for this crap.

In celebration of this event, you can stop racking your brains on what to get me (no I am not registered at Blogs ‘r Us), simply humor me and throw a comment out today. Those who read daily but stay quiet, show a little love and tell me what you like, or what you don’t like. A favorite post, a least favorite topic. Or hell, share a recipe or a story of your own. Just de-lurk and show me that you are there. Then you can go back into your little holes and read quietly again after today.

Thank you all, and I see you in the stats so I know you are there. For making me realize that there is always room for more humor in your lives.

Haven’t had enough of me yet? You can also read me at 50-Something Moms Blog.

For photo enthusiasts, visit Leaving the zip code, photos from outside the comfort zone.

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April 6, 2009 · 5:29 pm

Time to Cry Tuesday – Lifelong Friends

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I collect people.

Seriously. I have people in my life for decades. I always thought this was common, as my husband does too, but I have come to realize that most people are not fortunate enough to have friends in their lives that they have known since they were young.

Me? I still have my best friends from 7th grade. Three of them. I was late to the party as they have known each other since kindergarten. They are the place I go when the world is too much. Or when I want to laugh to the point of tears.

I can be 16 with them, when being 16 is completely out of the question because 4 of our collective 8 kids is older than that already. They will never tell me what I want to hear, but they will surely tell me what I need to.

There are code words and phrases that we share like a secret language – or twinspeak. Our own intimictionary of vocab that would have an outsider shaking their head trying to figure out what we are talking about.

Months can go by with little contact, no more than a passing “I would freak but i don’t have time” kind of conversation. But still our love for each other is undying.

The decades pass. We fall, we get up, we live to the point of tears and then we trudge on thinking that if we have to live one more day of this crazy life we will surely scream. Then we stop and spend some precious time together. And laugh so hard we forgot that was possible.

That is when I realize I am the luckiest person on earth. Not one but three! Each of whom would drop everything at a moment’s notice to be THERE. Wherever and whatever THERE is. And believe me, THERE wears many costumes.

Three words for you girls:

Love. Love. Love.

(and no Ali, we did not have any fun without you this weekend ; )

Haven’t had enough of me yet? You can also read me at 50-Something Moms Blog.

For photo enthusiasts, visit Leaving the zip code, photos from outside the comfort zone.

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March 1, 2009 · 9:35 pm

UW Chi O Toddler Dance 2.0

For those who do not know the origin of the ever famous international dance craze known as ‘The Toddler Dance’, please take a little hop over to this post and see where it all started.

Since this a true favorite of my daughter’s, she decided to bring it to the girls of the Chi Omega sorority at the University of Wisconsin, Madison. This past weekend the university took part in its first ever dance marathon to benefit UW American Family Children’s Hospital. Miss Jana personally raised $772, her sorority raised $6,000 ($4,000 over their goal) and UW raised a total of $56,880.94.  Although this does not even compare to the millions of dollars raised at Penn State or Indiana, their total is still very impressive. They were able to raise more money in their first year of Dance Marathon than any other Big 10 schools raised in their first year, exceeding them by at least $20,000. For those inclined I believe donations are still open.

At the last hour of this all-night event, without any sleep and having not sat down for the entire danceathon, this group of Jana’s sorority sisters decided to end their stint with a rousing rendition of the Toddler Dance. Here’s a shout out to my dear friend @flipgonzo , the funniest clown on twitter, who named this…

The Toddler Dance 2.0.

Thanks girls. You did our family proud!

Haven’t had enough of me yet? You can also read me at 50-Something Moms Blog.

For photo enthusiasts, visit Leaving the zip code, photos from outside the comfort zone.

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February 23, 2009 · 11:32 pm

Time to Cry Tuesday – Sitting Shiksa

sitting-shiksa2No, there is not a typo in that headline. Keep reading and you will see what I mean.

This past week one of my dearest friends – my wife of sorts –  lost her dad. She and I are known somewhat as the Lucy and Ethel of our community. Our antics are legendary (in our minds, anyway). The following is an adaptation of an email that I sent to our friends:

After a long period of compromised health, my friend’s dad cried uncle and died peacefully. Unfortunately, she was away on vacation with her daughter and had to return quickly to make arrangements. As you can imagine this has been a very difficult time for her. But I am happy to report her sense of humor and love of life is fully intact. Read on.

She will be going to Arizona for a first memorial service on Sunday and then to Boston on March 3rd where she and her brother will have his ashes buried next to her mom, hopefully in an ‘uneventful’ ceremony. Not a chance! (note: as with all families there is the predicted drama that is hard to avoid)

As her life is here in NY now, we know that there are many that want to pay their respects to her since she is always there for everyone else. Only our dear friend, in her grief, could call me this morning with this novel and frankly hysterical request. Let me share our conversation:

Friend: Hi, it’s me again. I decided you are right and I need to do something here.

Me: That’s great, what did you have in mind?

Friend: I think I would like to ‘Sit Shiksa’!

Me: That could be the funniest thing I have ever heard.

Friend: Oh and tell people to forget the boxes of cake, bring wine and have a drink with me to celebrate my dad’s life.

For those who are not ‘of the tribe’, when someone dies in the Jewish religion we sit Shiva. Shiva meaning ‘seven’ in Hebrew, we receive guests in our home to pay their respects for 7(ish) days. (it’s complicated)

Figuring that 7 days of guests would surely put her husband in a psych unit, sitting Shiksa will be an afternoon ordeal. Shiksa, on the other hand, means ‘woman who is not a Jew’. Of course we all know that our friend is a Jew by association by now as she has been to more Bar Mitzvot and Shiva calls than most Jews by birth.

Please join their family, not to mourn, but celebrate the life of the man who fathered our dear friend. One hell of a guy and a man who always loved a good party. He will surely be there with us.

If you have friends of mixed marriages, or live in a diverse community, pass this on. There are few that hear it who cannot relate.

Here is to my dear friend, who can truly make lemonade out of ANY situation in life. And who always keeps me laughing, even through her tears. When she married our dear friend, she married us too. And she has been a hell of a good sport about it for the past 20 years. We love you babe. May your grieving be cathartic and know we will love you forever.

Sitting on my desk is a framed piece you gave me years ago:

Friends are the family you choose.

I choose you!

Haven’t had enough of me yet? You can also read me at 50-Something Moms Blog.

For photo enthusiasts, visit Leaving the zip code, photos from outside the comfort zone.

 

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February 17, 2009 · 7:33 pm

Taxicab Confessions Revisited or Putting the Social in Social Media

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A quick aside, sorry for no Time to Cry Tuesday this week… had not time (to cry).

Back in October we had this wild experience in a cab with a driver who claimed to be Doug Ingle from Iron Butterfly. Go ahead and read that link, I will wait.

Ok, so a couple of weeks ago I received a comment on that post from someone named Ryan who said that their dad had the same experience. Small internet.

Today, I did my usual afternoon stat check (that is what we bloggers do to validate ourselves now and then) and I saw that there was an inordinate amount of hits on that very post. Linking to the source I was led here where sure enough there are others with the same story, and my post was linked about halfway down.

So this guy tells this story all the time. Maybe all of us that have been in his cab need a Facebook group. Or not.

Seriously, this is one of the greatest things about blogging. The internet gets smaller everyday. Things come full circle and people find others who have had the same experiences.

The social in social media.

On that note I will let you all know that this weekend I was lucky enough to meet two of my original blog friends, or as my family likes to refer to them, my imaginary friends. Shouting out to Wendy and Liz, who I am pretty sure I could have gone to summer camp with in another life. These are two women I am proud to say I am now REAL friends with. Or friends IRL (in real life) as they say in the blogosphere. For those who are fearful of meeting people online I can say beyond a shadow of a doubt, neither one of them is a psycho OR a creep.

Oh, and we are not dating for those who think that is the only reason to meet people online.

Haven’t had enough of me yet? You can also read me at 50-Something Moms Blog.

For photo enthusiasts, visit Leaving the zip code, photos from outside the comfort zone.

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February 10, 2009 · 10:28 pm

You never know what will come in the mail

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The other day I received a mysterious envelope in the mail that had an odd lump in the middle. I opened it and out dropped the button above wrapped in a flyer. Yes, that is my High School yearbook picture on that button. No joke!

Personally, I find this a little creepy. The idea that a classmate of 30+ years ago is scanning the yearbook and industriously making these odd buttons in his free time is just a bit staggering. The flyer had a line I love, “The 30th reunion was not well attended because hundreds of classmates were not able to be notified of the date”.

Um, no pal, the reunion was not well attended because lots of people are fat and bald 30 years later or perhaps they simply don’t want to see the kids from ‘the old neighborhood’. Believe me, I attended the reunion with my 3 best friends and we had lots of laughs. But seriously, the crowd was a little scary.

You know, there is a reason we lose touch with many people from high school.

Me, I have certainly lost a huge chunk of brain cells somewhere along the line. People would come up to me and put their hand over their nametag and say, ‘I bet you don’t remember me’. Hey good bet, I have no friggin idea who the hell you are sistah! Seriously folks, when you go to a reunion, don’t play that game. As much as we all want to believe we look the same as we did as teenagers, or worse that we were truly memorable to everyone that sat next to us in math class, we just aren’t.

So, would you join the yahoo group listed on this button?

Me, think I am going to pass. Facebook is enough of a walk down memory lane for this old chick.

Haven’t had enough of me yet? You can also read me at 50-Something Moms Blog.

For photo enthusiasts, visit Leaving the zip code, photos from outside the comfort zone.

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January 26, 2009 · 11:38 pm

Time to Cry Tuesday – An Icon

Sorry, third time in as many weeks that I am posting about loss. However, this one is quite different.

Sunday I had the pleasure (yes pleasure!) of attending a memorial service for someone who helped shape the woman I am today.  Actually, not just me, but hundreds of women through the 60s and 70s. This woman, Alice Sternin, was the director of the summer camp I attended. I have posted about this idyllic place from my childhood before, as both my children are fortunate enough to share in the legacy.

I have never attended a service where there was as much laughter as tears. The essence of this woman was described by countless speakers. Everyone in the room shared the same memories of this tiny woman who was larger than life.

People traveled from all over the country. Family and friends spoke. One after another, stories were shared that sparked long forgotten memories for each one of us . When her famous lines were quoted, the entire room joined  in unison. Treasured camp songs were sung and tears were shed for the loss, not just of this woman, but the childhood jewel this perfect place had been for all of us.

My daughter has had the good fortune to have had this same experience. The following is an excerpt from a letter I wrote to Jana and her girls at the end of their last summer as campers. This sums up what this woman built. And her legacy will carry on long after she is gone.

You are so very lucky to have this piece of your life. Camp is something that you cannot put a label on. There are no words to describe how you feel when you are with your girls. How the sight of the lake and mountains fill your heart in a way that nothing else in this world truly can. The essence of camp is ingrained in each and every one of you. It is part of what makes you who you are, and believe me, who you will always be. We are all beyond lucky to know these feelings.

Leaving is never easy.  All these years later I still tear up as I walk out of camp and drink in one last moment of the place I love so much.

Never, NEVER, take this place for granted. Hold it close and it will never let you down.  

Today, as I sat with MY girls so many years later, I felt the full weight of those words.

Here’s to you Big Al! The toughest camp director in the East. With the biggest heart! You will be dearly missed, but rest easy, your legacy will never die.

Haven’t had enough of me yet? You can also read me at 50-Something Moms Blog.

For photo enthusiasts, visit Leaving the zip code, photos from outside the comfort zone.

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January 13, 2009 · 12:02 am

Time to Cry Tuesday – I don’t know and you don’t know

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There are times in our lives when we are profoundly touched by another person even though we have never met them. Sadly, sometimes they are already gone and we have lost the opportunity.

I have a friend in my community who I am very fond of. We do not know each other all that well but have been friends for a long time and our husbands are btff (best tennis friends forever). She and her family emanate an infectious warmth and hospitality. Being in their home one feels instantly comfortable and engaged. Their circle of friends is equally embracing. We always leave their house feeling as if we have had a full experience. Does that make sense? I hope so.

This past weekend we attended a memorial service for her mom who passed away suddenly last month. This particular congregation has a beautiful custom of creating a booklet of readings for its life cycle events. Friends and family members read from this booklet and helped paint a picture of this vibrant woman.

During the service my friend spoke about the mom she had lost. Theirs was a tender relationship, one that every mother and daughter hopes to have. Her loss was very painful to witness, yet being there I felt the greatest honor she could give her mother was to share who she was with those who did not know her.

She told a story about going back to her mom’s home to sort through the pieces of her life. The most precious things she found were two post-it notes. Her mom had a habit of scribbling down thoughts and sticking them around her home. (a woman after my own heart as I have a bulletin board filled with such things over my desk). One of the notes said it all for me:

You don’t know and I don’t know.

How perfect is that? Pretty much says it all. We can worry and ruminate. We can plan and organize. We can strive and learn and try to control it all. But in the end, you don’t know and I don’t know.

I am sorry I never had the pleasure to meet this fine woman, but in some ways I suppose I have.

To my dear friend, may your grief be tempered with the knowledge that you were loved fully by a mother who adored you. And may your wonderful boys, or shall I say young men, give you the strength and support you need during this terribly sad time.

And may I say, it was an honor to ‘know’ your mom.

Haven’t had enough of me yet? You can also read me at Mid-Century Modern Moms and at 50-Something Moms Blog.

For photo enthusiasts, visit Leaving the zip code, photos from outside the comfort zone.

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December 8, 2008 · 9:40 pm

Time to Cry Tuesday – Please Help

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Oy, talk about time to cry…

This post hits very close to home for my family.

I have written about my kids experience at the summer camp that both my husband and I attended. Friendships made there are ones that run deep and last a lifetime. My son spent this past summer as a waiter; the ultimate summer at this camp. For those who do not know the culture it is hard to understand how seven weeks can make such an impact on a young man’s life. But for the lucky few there is an understanding of what it means to know that each and every one of their boys will always have their back. It is a sense of belonging that can not be duplicated.

Sadly, one of these young men is battling a very serious illness and we all need to have his back. This is a 16-year-old boy that we have known for many years. He is part of our extended camp family and when he falls we bleed.

He is one of 594 patients who are members of the Chordoma Foundation.

In less than two years the Chordoma Foundation has done some VERY promising research which could lead to new treatments in time to benefit those living with chordoma today!

But this research cannot happen without funding. Many researchers have projects ready to start immediately but are simply waiting for one thing – money.

Please join me in helping these families reach their goal of raising $300,000 by the end of 2008. If all 594 patients and family members pledged to donate and/or raise $500 by the end of the year they can get pretty damn close.  Any amount will help, it all adds up.

It is a custom in our family to donate one night’s hannukah gift to a charity. This year it is an honor to do so to help our friend. I urge you all to consider a similar donation, one less present at the holiday is a small price to pay for such a huge gift to those in dire need.

This young man’s brother has created an online Chordoma Community. Through this website, donations made in his name can be tracked. Please make your donation in honor of his mom, my friend Diane Seaman. This season let’s give this family the gift of hope.

Thank you all from the bottom of my heart.

Bloggers and Twitterers, please link, digg, kirsty, stumble, RT and whatever else you can do to help pass this along. Follow me on Twitter @amyz5 with the hashtag #chordomahelp.

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November 26, 2008 · 11:58 pm

What are you thankful for?

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After an evening elbow deep in stuffing, I realized that there was no post up for Thanksgiving. I decided to go with the basics.

My BBFF Liz tweeted this question today and it got me to thinking about all the people out there who are reading (and I know you are there because I see the numbers rising). How cool would it be if every person that reads this blog left a comment letting us know what makes them feel like giving thanks.

The world is surely on fire. At the risk of being cliché, now more than ever, is a time to share what works in our lives.

Me? Good health – NEVER taken for granted, having my daughter home, my brother and his family visiting and sharing the holiday with good friends and family. For those who are not joining us, we miss you.

Oh and a wonderful update on the blogger mom who sent out an appeal for a kidney donor for her daughter. The hospital said their lines were jammed and never have they received so many donor forms. AND, they are optimistic that they have found a match. Read more here. So, yes, I am thankful for the power of the internet.

Now give it up out there!

Haven’t had enough of me yet? You can also read me at Mid-Century Modern Moms and at 50-Something Moms Blog.

For photo enthusiasts, visit Leaving the zip code, photos from outside the comfort zone.

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