Monthly Archives: June 2012

June 10, 2012 · 10:08 pm

Big Man, Little Dog and the Bloomies Shoe Dept.

Ok, I will admit this upfront. I was going to title this post ‘No evidence of a penis on this man’ but I was truly fearful of what sort of traffic I would get from that. And the whole gender stereotype thing does rub me the wrong way – although by the way he is dressed it is obvious this dog was not his idea. And I am thinking the shoe shopping wasn’t either. He looks more like a Home Depot sort of guy to me.

Maybe I should have titled this, ‘Shopping is not a canine activity’, because that is what really irks me. I could go on about the upswing in people bringing there little pampered pooches out to shopping and dinner excursions, dressing them up in little clothes and putting them in strollers, for G-d’s sake. I hear this is an epidemic in South Florida. The last time I was there I saw a yorkie in an Ed Hardy hoodie… that is just not ok. (but a lovely outfit to shop for shoes in Bloomies, I suppose) What is up with this behavior?

This is the second time this year that I have seen a man in the women’s shoe dept of Bloomingdales with one of these little dogs.

Just guessing when this guy first started dating this woman this was not his idea of a night out.

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June 8, 2012 · 12:45 am

Jon Cleary, Dr. John AND a rainbow

Such a night…

Sometimes you have the good fortune of seeing a legend one more time. At 72 Dr. John still rocked the house with his own special brand of New Orleans magic.

We raised our kids on songs like this and to add to the magic we them both with us. And we had dear friends came too.

AND there was a rainbow on the way there.

Can’t ask for much more than that on a Thursday night.

Ok, maybe he could have played a little Iko Iko. Here’s an amazing all-star version. (and the headdress is to die for!)

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June 6, 2012 · 10:55 pm

Commuter Power Ranger

This was parked at the parking lot of our local commuter train station. I would not be at all surprised if the blue Power Ranger came off that train.

I am thinking of buying this one on ebay and tying it to his handlebars for when he returns . Seriously, how much more fun can you have for $5.99?

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June 5, 2012 · 10:28 pm

Fashionotsa

That would not be fashion nazi. I am a fashioNOTsa.

Or why I suck at shopping.

I know, I am a Jewish girl from Long Island and therefore it is expected that I love to shop. But I don’t. I hate it AND I suck at it. Perhaps I should explore my true lineage.

But sometimes you just need stuff. So after a lovely meeting this morning and a surprise lunch with Gary (because I was on the 59th Street bridge and had to pee so badly I had to stop at his office), seeing that I had no deadlines tomorrow, I ventured out into the consumer jungle.

Did I mention I hate this worse than going to the dentist? At least there I can get sweet air. These are the 5 reasons why:

  1. The woman in the next dressing room at Lord & Taylor spent a solid 15 minutes on the phone with one of her son’s teachers and for the life of me I could not imagine how she kept trying on clothes without ever shutting up. All I can surmise was that her son is screwed from her micromanagement and someone should tell her that talking on the phone and trying on clothing does not constitute multi-tasking.
  2. I need to see the dermatologist as soon as humanly possible because the lighting in every dressing room made me see that I must have no less than 5 horrible derm conditions. Fluorescent lighting and dressing rooms: who is responsible?
  3. There are no circumstances in which a 3 way mirror is OK.
  4. Clothes on. Clothes off. Repeat. How can this be fun? Well, I know how but this is the wrong context.
  5. I always have to pee and the bathrooms are always in a different zip code than the women’s clothing. Why is that?

The only funny part of today was the cashier at Century 21. She had a very heavy accent and as she checked me out this was our conversation:

She: Your zin cone?

Me: (no idea what that means) Um, no thanks (afraid to agree to anything in fear it might be hard to undo).

She: No, no, no… your zin cone?!

Me: Sorry, not getting what that is.

She: Zin cone. Zin cone. Zin cone! (as if saying it 3 times will make me understand)

Me: (starting to get the giggles and wishing I had a witness) I am so sorry but I have NO idea what you are saying. Maybe you want to write it down.

She: Zin cone. You know… town. 1-1-something-something-something (she loves to repeat herself).

Me: OH! YOU MEAN ZIP CODE.

At this point I simply looked around for the camera and then split.

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June 4, 2012 · 11:16 pm

Time to Cry Tuesday – Laugh and Cry

Life is hard. Whoever forgot to tell us that when we were young… thanks a lot.

I try to make it a point to remind my kids that feeling like crap gives happiness context. I am sure I have written that here before.

Someone once told me that it is good to laugh and cry at least once every day.

They might have been bi-polar so I try to adhere to that loosely. But I agree. I love to laugh. There are days when I have the expectation of misery and something will make me laugh so hard I cannot breathe. And there are times when out of nowhere I can here a song, smell something, see something… and burst into tears with a memory.

Yeh, so no I am NOT bi-polar. But I am a good crier. And a GREAT laugher.

The key is to find the right balance between the two.

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June 4, 2012 · 12:02 pm

Upcycle That Kitty

via Pospsi.com, via Sky News

There are days when everything is funny. These are the days I live for. It could be the people that I know, the fact that they are also Magnets for The Absurd, or perhaps the universe has sympathy on us poor working slobs on a rainy Monday morning. But this. THIS. This one made me laugh so hard.

To the point of tears.

Which, btw, is the tagline for this blog.

So here goes. A big thank you to Wendy for posting this one.

It would seem that Bart Jansen’s poor kitty was killed by a car. So what did he do? Did he spend his days sobbing. Oh no, no, no. In the spirit of turning lemons into lemonade he turned his kitty into a kittycopter!

Um, yes, folks, good old Bart stuffed his deceased feline and converted Orville into a radio-controlled copter. When you think of it, why bury, cremate or toss a perfectly good dead cat when you can fly it around your yard for hours of entertainment? And then post it on YouTube so the whole world could enjoy your pet. I like to think of this as extending the pet value. This has the flavor of a good B. Kliban drawing. (please click that link and note the url for a little more kitty humor). 

Is this disrespectful to the pet or the ultimate tribute?

Can you imagine the conversation at the taxidermist’s shop? You want him in WHAT position? Might I ask why? Oh, a kittycopter… that’s a cool idea.  I would think that taxidermists are not all that easily shocked; they must have the most disturbing requests. Hmmm… maybe I should start a taxidermist blog and interview them all over the country. Sorry, I digress.

Of course there is video. When I clicked to watch there were only 301 hits. I predict this sucker breaks 100,000 in no time. I am sure I will be good for at least 50 myself. And if you are wondering, yes, I did watch the full 3:34 of this. The landing was the best part outside of his adjusting the little copter propellors.

Oriville the kitty? I heard his dog Wilbur has been crossing the street very carefully in fear of becoming the next victim of radio-controlled absurdity.

Happy Monday all. Hope you had a good laugh.

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