Category Archives: men and women

Sons are from Mars, Daughters are from Venus: A Mother’s Day Story

mothers-day

Today I received the most beautiful early Mother’s Day card from Jana. The second year of college has brought with it an ease in remembering the little things that make a big difference. She has made sure birthday gifts and cards arrive in time without being reminded. She handles her own ‘stuff’ with ease and little complaint. And this mother’s day the gift of her sending cards to not only me, but both her grandmothers, is the best one I could receive.

I texted her to thank her and tell her that she made me cry. She said she knew she would and then told me she had a funny story. Here it is:

Her friend went to buy a Mother’s day card and a girl who was in the store told her all the good ones were gone. The two of them decided to work as a team, going through every card in the store to try and find one that did not suck. While they were diligently reading every last card on the rack, a boy walked in, picked up the first card he saw, didn’t read it and walked out.

And that is the difference between boys and girls.

Hey, you have to give him credit for actually buying the card.

On this Mother’s Day I would like to wish all the moms in my life a wonderful day filled with family, love, and nothing that you do not want to do. 

To my mom and my mother in law, I wish you the happiest day of all. I hope you both know how grateful we are to have reached this age and still have all four of our childrens’ grandparents. We are truly blessed.

Haven’t had enough of me yet? You can also read me at 50-Something Moms Blog.

For photo enthusiasts, visit Leaving the zip code, photos from outside the comfort zone.

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Filed under family, grandmothers, holidays, humor, Jana, men and women, moms, parenting, teenagers, women

Janie Knight

Before I start today’s post I want to point out the most ridiculous thing that I have seen this week. This was tweeted by my friend Beth at techmamas and featured on TechCrunch. Burger King has launched a cologne that SMELLS LIKE MEAT! This is outrageous even by my standards. Check it out.

janie-knight_small1I am what you would call a vivid dreamer. Sometimes my dreams are so real that it takes me a few minutes to shake them off in the morning. I love to share them as soon as I wake up. This is usually when Gary walks out of the room as quickly as possible or pretends he can not hear the sound of my voice. 

One morning last spring I had a dream right before I woke up. In this dream Gary told me that he was leaving me. He had met a 30-year-old named Janie Knight with big boobs (cliche, I know), they were moving to Summit, MA and they were…

taking the dog!

Now mind you, we have 2 kids. Granted one is in college, but this guy was taking the dog?! He told me that Summit was in the country and the dog would be happier there.

What did I do when I woke up? What any loving, trusting wife of 20 some odd years would do, I grabbed the laptop off my night table and Googled both Janie Knight and Summit, MA. I will be kind to the 3 Janie Knights on LinkedIn (two of which do happen to live in New England, BTW) and the one on Facebook as I am pretty sure they are innocent. And probably allergic to dogs.

The next thing I did was open the shower door and start yelling at my poor husband who was shocked at first and then could not stop laughing at me. Actually, I think he was flattered by my jealousy. I do not always appear to like him. Oh, come on, if you are married you get that.

Fast forward to later that afternoon. The doorbell rang and I sent my son upstairs to answer it. He came downstairs with the above card in his hand and asked who Jill Knight was. Me, “You mean Janie Knight”. Danny, “Nope, Jill Knight. She just sent Daddy flowers.”

No joke. And they were quite nice. Not sure what was funnier; the flowers or the fact that he got her name wrong! The tough part is that he told the whole story to the florist who found it quite funny. Now I need to find a new florist!

Never a dull moment in this house. 

Haven’t had enough of me yet? You can also read me at Mid-Century Modern Moms and at 50-Something Moms Blog.

For photo enthusiasts, visit Leaving the zip code, photos from outside the comfort zone.

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Filed under absurdities, men and women

Men are from Mars, Women are from Venus (vol. 2)

I have written about this topic before. You can read it here.

I have always been fascinated by the different way men and women perceive things. This morning I woke up agitated from a disturbing dream. Oddly enough, so did Gary. I assume these trying times are getting to both of us.

He has often placed a request for me not to share my dreams (they scare him). Today I did not give him a chance to reject the story, he was still half asleep and emerging from his own bad dream.

Mine? He was forcing me to move to Florida and we were driving down with all our stuff. Then we were in this awful cookie cutter house with all these boxes and strange people we did not know. He was telling me that he was going to change his career, sell windows and I was a bitch for not supporting him. I was sobbing uncontrollably saying that I hate Florida (sorry Floridians, I like to visit).

His? Oh his dream was that 25% of the earth split off and was careening into space. Alrighty then, a science fiction dream.

I laughed and said this would make a perfect blog post.

Gary: You can’t do that, people will think you are crazy.

Me: Wait, you had a dream about a quarter of the earth splitting off and careening through space and you think people will consider me crazy for dreaming about a forced move to Florida?

And there you have it.

Later he said that he was on one piece of the earth and I was on the other. All I could think of was that the only way his subconscious could figure out how to get rid of me was by destroying the planet.

Kinda scary if you ask me. Note to self: sleep with one eye open.

Haven’t had enough of me yet? You can also read me at Mid-Century Modern Moms where they are celebrating their 1 year blogaversary. And at 50-Something Moms Blog… Poor is the New Rich and There is no Hair in Team .

For photo enthusiasts, visit Leaving the zip code, photos from outside the comfort zone.

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Filed under absurdities, humor, men, men and women, relationships, women