Sometimes I worry about sharing the absurdities in my household.
Wait, no I don’t, this is one of the main reasons I started blogging.
Backstory: Gary has all sorts of crazy sayings that he claims ‘everyone knows’. Most of them are not exactly family-rated (ok, I guess the Steely Dan post wasn’t either). This is one of the kids’ favorites. When you say something to aggravate him he tells you to…
“Jump up my ass and look for strawberries!”
No, I am not kidding. At first they tried to analyze what it meant. (scary) Then it just became a given.
Sunday morning phone call:
Gary: I am done with tennis, what do you want to do for breakfast.
Me: I am making french toast but I need strawberries.
Gary: Great, I will pick some up.
then he hesitates a moment and says:
Or… I could bend you over and pull them out of your ass.
Yeh, well maybe you had to be there. Or maybe you are calling social services as you read this. Forget about it, the younger one is 17. The damage is already done.
French toast anyone?