Tag Archives: moms

June 8, 2009 · 10:09 pm

Time to Cry Tuesday: Priceless

There are a handful of moments in advertising history that have touched the souls of those who see them. One of the more famous examples is the Mastercard Priceless campaign. This past week, one of my mommy idols could have starred in one of these commercials.

The scenario: The Dave Matthews Band was playing on the Plaza in the Today Show Toyota Summer Concert Series. Both my friend and her 10th grade daughter are huge fans of the band. In fact, they are a full DMB family of fans. This particular friend has found herself to be an unlucky member of the Sandwich Generation. Many of us are in the midst of raising children at the same time we are dealing with aging parents with health problems. Being an only child of a widowed mom, she is the healthcare concierge extraordinaire. Last week was a particularly harrowing one on that front.

Enter the opportunity to go into the city at some ungodly hour (3:30 AM) to stand in line for the concert. She was all set to take her daughter and a friend until the weather turned nasty and she began to rethink the event. At this point her college-aged son pulled her aside in a sage-like manner and told her that she would never forgive herself if she missed this opportunity of a lifetime that her daughter would never forget. (please note: said son aspires to be a documentary film-maker).

Funny how our kids spout back at us what we have taught them.

So, without hesitation, sporting rain gear of all kinds, off they went on the 3:30 train into the city. I received an early text telling me she was there. Within an hour I texted back that I had not only seen her daughter dancing on camera, but had DVRd it. Her daughter could not be happier. Until… (yes this keeps getting better)

…she screamed out, ‘Dave, I love you” during a lull in the performance and he turned around and smiled at her. Kind of like a young girl’s dream come true. Wait, it gets even better.

During the show they gave out foam guitars to the audience. The daughter’s friend was holding one. After the show, Dave came around and signed the guitar! And the friend? He decided that since he would not have been able to go to the show with out her, gave the guitar to this very lucky girl.

I know, Time to Cry all the way around. I love this story. Not only because the main character is one of my main women, but because every step of the way it was about what I like to call ‘the good stuff’. Truly a priceless experience.

Here is a picture of the two happy teens on the train ride home. The inset shows the Dave Matthews sig.

After-the-show

Haven’t had enough of me yet? You can also read me at 50-Something Moms Blog. For photo enthusiasts, visit Leaving the zip code, photos from outside the comfort zone.

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Filed under aging parents, family, friendship, moms, music, New York, New York City, parenting, relationships, rock 'n roll, teenagers, Time to Cry Tuesdays, women

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June 1, 2009 · 11:19 pm

Time to Cry Tuesday – Who is That Man?

jr-prom-prep

This picture simply kills me;  brings me right down to my Mommy knees. I walked in on Danny getting ready for the Junior Prom and this moment took my breath away. He rolled his teenaged eyes at me as I began clicking, but it mattered not. I am pretty sure he gets it under all the bravado.

This was a week of milestones. Ones that he simply glided through while my heart both swelled and ached.

A friend I have carpooled with since the boys were in pre-school called me the other day and shared a moment that summed it all up.

She said she was driving him to hebrew school for the last time, which ended this week with a Confirmation service. She looked in her rearview mirror at the young man with the hairly legs and deep voice who needed a shave. She could not help but think of the little boy with the blonde bowl haircut that she used to lift out of the car seat so many years ago.

Hey, they grow up! Back when they were little, there were those days I thought would never end. Having grown kids was not something I could fathom.

Now I turn around and think, “Hey, who is that man?”

Haven’t had enough of me yet? You can also read me at 50-Something Moms Blog. For photo enthusiasts, visit Leaving the zip code, photos from outside the comfort zone.

 

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April 20, 2009 · 8:05 pm

Time to Cry Tuesday – Twenty!

jana_at_20

Indulge me – if you will – this little walk down the long and winding road of parenthood, for this week I will celebrate not only the birthday of my oldest child, but the anniversary of my 20th year of parenting.

What the hell!

Sometimes I wake up and forget how old I am.  I have had some weird dreams about not studying for a test, or being at camp or some other adolescent place and I totally forget that I am the mom of these young adults. I am embarrassed to say there are times when they are way more grown up than I am.

When I stop to think about it the whole thing is rather staggering.

Twenty years of “I’m the mommy, that’s why”. Two decades of being responsible for the well-being of other human beings. Two hundred and forty months of always being cognitive of other people’s whereabouts and safety. Seven thousand three hundred nights of being only as happy as my most miserable child.

You get the picture.

I have done many things in my life. Built a career, nurtured (or is that tortured) a marriage, made a house a home, navigated the nastiness of the healthcare system with my parents, built friendships and contributed to a community. But there is no other single thing I have done in my life that has had a greater impact on me than being a mom. Seriously. Not because I am expected to feel that way. Or because that is what I want my kids to think. But because it is simply…

True.

I am a better person for what they have taught me to be. From the moment they could reach out and hold my hand as we crossed the street, to the day when they had to push that hand away and ‘do it themselves’. They have taught me when to hold tight, and more importantly, when to let go.

Here’s to you, baby girl. Kiss your teens goodbye and grab your twenties by the balls. You are truly someone to proud of.

Haven’t had enough of me yet? You can also read me at 50-Something Moms Blog.

For photo enthusiasts, visit Leaving the zip code, photos from outside the comfort zone.

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June 29, 2008 · 5:13 pm

How many Jews does it take to pack a Jeep?

Or as my father-in-law says, “Seven Jews, Nine Opinions”.

I guess you could say as a tribe we have a tendency to over control a situation and discuss our options ad nauseum.

Yes, my friends, once again I find myself reducing things into small spaces. This is the abbreviated version of the dorm room packing. My daughter (and her stuff) are on the move again. And this time she is taking my son with her. Sleep away camp! (more on this in my next post).

Picture this. A bright and sunny Saturday morning in June (the mother’s month from hell). In the past 30 days I have helped her pack and move home from college, pack (a minimal amount of stuff) for a 10-day trip to Israel, and now, after sending the oversized trunk and duffle up to the adirondacks via trucking company, we are in the business of trying to fit 4 19-year-olds and their weekend of stuff in a Jeep. The catch here is that the plan is to go camping at the Dave Matthews concert on the way. So along with all the other nonsense du jour, we must find a place for the tent. (note the ihome in the middle of everything, this is a very rustic camp we are talking about here).

There we were, four girls and their parents (and of course the dog), everyone (including the dog) with an opinion (or two) of what should go where in the car.

My daughter, “Guys, did I not tell you to pack light?”

The only solid piece of advice from the whole experience was from the mom who suggested that putting the tent at the bottom was probably not a great idea since that was the item that needed to be taken out first. (she must have had practice with this).

A half hour later and many discussions about ‘the best way to get to Saratoga” (Jews also love to talk about how they have the best route to… anywhere, actually, must be all those years of wandering) they are on their way.

Oh, and of course they never went camping. When a guy from camp offered a place to stay at his parents summer home on Lake George AND a ride to the concert to boot, the well placed tent seemed less than desirable.

Anybody else jealous of her life?

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June 12, 2008 · 9:35 pm

This is not a dress rehearsal…

With the graduation season upon us (today was the last day of classes in our district), and by request of a friend who flatteringly remembered an email I sent last year, I have decided to post this reflection. This certainly falls under the category of finding the time to cry. Even if you don’t have a graduate, this one will probably require a tissue:

This is not a dress rehearsal…

or watch the temp when you decide to iron the graduation gown.

6AM on the day that my first child graduates high school.

how can this be, she was just a curly-headed little whirling dervish whose door i had to hold shut as she was throwing her ever famous brand of temper tantrums. that same door with the loose latch from all the times she slammed it for effect when she stormed into her room in her tweens. you know the one, who at five years old marched into nuerosurgery to ‘get her neck fixed’ and never once asked ‘why me?’.

who was that radiant young woman that walked out of the house wednesday morning with her car packed and her keys in hand saying, “don’t worry mom, i have the garmin GPS, i don’t need a map!”

well i think, perhaps, i need a map today. someone tell me how to navigate this road. we surely have had enough practice. we graduate them ad nauseum – from the 4’s, kindergarten, 5th grade, 8th grade – the most graduated generation of all times. you would think we would get used to it. but this year’s cap does not have flourescent orange and green finger paint decorating it. this kid has actually grown up! how dare she. does she not know that my bravado this year has all been an act. of course i could not be ready for her to be the competant, independent, grab-the-world-by-the-balls person i worked so hard to raise. does she not know i was only kidding!! wisconsin?!! that is halfway across the country!

i digress – back to the gown and the iron. being a working mom i always look for ways to overcompensate and make sure that i am doing the mom thing as well as the work thing. so, of course, they both are never really quite up to the standard i expect. somewhere in the 4-page green directions for graduation (you know the one, where the assistant principal gives them a 10 bullet list for how to enjoy graduation and prom, 9 of which stress not drinking or doing drugs) there was mention of taking the gown out of the bag and ironing it. at midnight i was the mom who would just hang it up. at 6AM i decided no daughter of mine will graduate with a wrinkled gown!

so why is it, exactly, that they make these things out of the same material as basketball shimmer shorts?!

no, you will not be able to notice my daughter by the big brown iron mark on the back of her white gown. but if you look close, you may notice that on the front left shoulder the fabric is, how should i put it, a tad ‘melted’.

as jana would say, ‘it’s FINE’. as my parents would say, i did it ‘the Amy way’.

a huge thank you to the jana who has become one of my favorite people on earth to spend time with. surely the one that knows me the best, and loves me anyway. sometimes it seems that she is raising me. i think her humor and radiant smile will get me through this one. levity has always been her strong point.

love and congrats to all of you who have been in the parenting trenches with me the past 18 years. for some of you it is your first, others, your last. it is never easy to watch them go. but then again, we could all use a rest. and as my mommy mentors tell me, they come home, stay out all night, sleep late and bring lots of laundry.

let the games begin!

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