Tag Archives: insurance

Iko Geico

Labragoat strikes again! I need puppy insurance!

If we had Allstate this post would not be half as funny.

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Filed under animals, Iko

The $300 Thaw

A few weeks back this household was struck with a series of annoying bad luck. Nothing all that serious, just a chain of really annoying events (ok and a few that were sort of serious but I won’t share, and thank goodness those have been resolved).

First, Gary got rear-ended on the LIE… in my car, of course. The insurance company was wonderful, we got a rental car and decided to spring for the $16/day upgrade to an SUV since it was in the midst of Snowmageddon ’11. All is well and good, it snows on top of snow and we get in the groove of shoveling every week; bitching and moaning like the rest of the world. Until…

We have completed the big dig out and Gary asks me for the keys to the rental car so he can move it into the street to brush off the snow.

I look everywhere… pockets, bags, bathrooms, nooks and crannies.

No key.

It becomes quite obvious that we have no choice but to call the rental company and get the second set.

News Flash: rental cars companies do NOT keep a second set. They call a locksmith for you. But of course on this day after a blizzard I am informed that the locksmith is snowed in. “With all due respect”, I told the woman at the rental place, “I am a 50-something Jewish woman on the North Shore of Long Island and I was able to dig out, what kind of wussy is this locksmith that he is… ahem… ‘snowed in’.”

He showed up at 4.

And $300 later we had a new key.

Fast forward to today. After a few days of record high temps the snow is melting almost as fast as it came down. And while I was out on the lawn (affectionately named ‘doody lane’ for the path we shoveled for the dog) picking up said doody, I spotted a glint out to the corner of my eye.

Yes folks, the original rental car key. As I suspected, it must have fallen out my pocket, was snowed upon and shoveled onto the mountain on the side of the driveway. Yes, other people have told me I have a Lucy and Ethel sort of life.

I thought about giving it back but decided that a shadow box frame was worth a $300 laugh in the whole of life.

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Filed under absurdities, homeowner, humor

The Kafka Van

kafka_van_small1

Believe it or not, this van has been parked around the corner from my house for years and I have never thought to take a picture of it. I am sure the first time I saw it I was amused, but it became one of those weird things that are commonplace with routine. Still, not your average sight in a sleepy suburban town.

Now that I decided to make this my New Year’s post I had to give it some more thought. 

I can’t help but wonder what the inside of this vehicle looks like. There are some makeshift curtains on the side windows. It looks like it was a school mini-bus in its first life which seems quite fitting. Not sure about the rack on the back, or is that apparatus used to keep the back doors bolted shut, like once you get inside you are not leaving so fast? Hmm, creepy.

What goes on in there? Is it piled high with German literature? What sort of weird activities could take place while driving around in a Kafka van? Do the occupants speak in run on sentences? Is there a sense of hopelessness when seated behind the wheel? Do other people think these things when driving by the Kafka van or is it just me?

I visited our dear friend Wikipedia and found out that good ol’ Franzy boy was an insurance man by profession. Not sure if that fits his aura, but hey, everyone has to make a living.

Here’s one more little interesting Wikifact about Kafka:

Prior to his death, Kafka wrote to his friend and literary executor Max Brod: “Dearest Max, my last request: Everything I leave behind me … in the way of diaries, manuscripts, letters (my own and others’), sketches, and so on, [is] to be burned unread.”[18] Brod overrode Kafka’s wishes, believing that Kafka had given these directions to him specifically because Kafka knew he would not honor them—Brod had told him as much. 

So, which one of you do I ‘assign’ the deleting (nudge, nudge, wink, wink) of all my blog posts upon my demise?

You will have to excuse me now as I need to go drive around and see if I can find where the Fellini convertible is parked.

Haven’t had enough of me yet? You can also read me at Mid-Century Modern Moms and at 50-Something Moms Blog.

For photo enthusiasts, visit Leaving the zip code, photos from outside the comfort zone.

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Filed under absurdities, art, carry a camera, humor, writing