Tag Archives: halloween

Another Senseless Pumpkin Deflation

Early each morning at the crack of dawn I unwrap my day during a peaceful walk with my dog. I often snap an amusing sight and post it to facebook in realtime. These are sort of little notes to myself for blog posts. This was one such image.

These ridiculous blow-up lawn ornaments can be seen all over the zip code from late September through early January. We start with the ghosts and pumpkins, roll into the turkeys and then hit the crescendo of lawn tackiness with the vast array of Christmas offenses. There is everything from the mundane Santa through to enormous snow globes with full nativity scenes or reindeer extravaganzas.

Early each morning you can drive through town and see at least half of them deflated on the front lawns of our less tasteful neighbors. It is as if someone has driven around in the cover of night pulling the plugs on all these babies.

I swear it is not me. But I do applaud whoever it is.

In this one instance, I have a sneaking suspicion it was the patriotic ghost.

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Time to Cry Tuesday – Halloween cupcakes

Yesterday I woke up at 4:30 and couldn’t sleep. I would like to say it was because I love halloween and I was so excited, but really folks, women of a certain age just don’t sleep all that regularly.

Usually I would lie in bed and just chill, but yesterday I decided to get up and bake the Funfetti Halloween cupcakes instead, because… well, because if I did not bake them then I would have to wait a whole year. (Funfetti is sort of a religion in these parts)

As I was making coffee and taking on this ridiculous task for no apparent reason, I realized that was the whole point. I was baking Halloween Funfetti cupcakes at 5AM… because I didn’t HAVE to. For so very many years – as a working mom – I found myself baking some ridiculous confection in the wee hours of the morning (the cowboy hat cupcakes at 2AM when Jana was in 4th grade come to mind. btw, these are cool, involving a cookie, an upside down cupcake and string licorice). But now, I was doing it because I wanted to, not to prove that I could do it all.

As I waited for the timer to go off, I sat drinking a cup of coffee while the sun came up and the household began to stir and got more than a little nostalgic about Halloween with younger kids. I have never been one to pine away for the past stages of parenting; but yesterday morning, in the quite of my kitchen I could not help but remember the sweet chaos of those days. Did I fully appreciate them wile they were happening? I like to think so. But in reality I am sure they were tempered with the rushed obsession to make it all the perfect halloween for the kids and maybe I did not savor it as much as I should have.

I have this thing about the seasons; I wish we could have just one day of beautiful summer beach weather in the middle of the winter and one crisp snowy day in the middle of a heatwave in the summer. Just one day. That’s not asking too much. I feel the same way about parenting now. Yesterday morning, as I was sprinkling the ‘fetti’ on the top of those cupcakes, I wished for just one day with ‘Little Danny‘ and ‘Little Jana‘, as they like to refer to their childhood selves.

Even the year when the little guy insisted on being a cowboy and I stayed up all night making his costume for him to wake up on Halloween and tell me ‘I want to be a Ninja like Dougie’.

I suppose the imperfections of raising kids are what makes parenting so perfect.

(BTW, ‘Big Danny’, since I tortured your dad that we did not have enough candy, you and the boys will be the happy recipients of a big box of candy… watch the package room for it.)

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Filed under danny, holidays, Jana, parenting, Time to Cry Tuesdays

Snowlaween

Seriously? Snow in NY in October?! Not sure I am ready for another winter just yet. I still have it in the back of my mind that I can get in another beach day.

We were lucky; just a dusting and we kept power. Many of my friends north and west of hear got dumped on AND lost electricity… again. With no hopes of it returning before Tuesday or Wednesday. Just a tip you guys, you get a free pass to eat as much candy as you want today.

Here’s hoping you all get your power back sooner than later and have a happy and SAFE Halloween.

I, for one, can’t wait to see all the little kids in their costumes.

On a not so kid oriented note, here is my favorite urban dictionary word of the week:

Damn, I wish I thought of that one!

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Are You Ready for a Zombie Attack


This one is for my husband. A true lover of Zombies I thought he would appreciate it. This is also my way of finding out if he is reading this blog.

With halloween fast approaching and no candy in my house just yet, I felt the need to start to get into the holiday spirit. I particularly like this iconic translation into exceptional zombie art.

Yes, it’s late when I am writing this.

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Halloween in Exquisite Form

Oh how I love this photo. This was hanging in a thrift shop window in Baltimore and the whole ensemble caught my eye. This would make one hell of a halloween costume. Probably not in my zip code but surely there is a time and place where this would be the envy of all the ‘girls’.

I especially love the type on the ‘form’. It is truly exquisite.

Hey, do you think this would go well with those afro wigs Gary has had his eye on? (don’t ask)

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Happy Garbage

Yes, Dr. J, it is time for another garbage post. This scarecrow sort of gave me the creeps. One, because of the horror movie smile, two because I couldn’t see its eyes and three, quite frankly because it took these people six months to toss the Halloween decorations. Seriously, can you imagine the crap they have in their house?

Sorry there was no Mel in this picture, I think the scarecrow creeped her out too.

In case any of you were wondering, no, none of my neighbors have yet to call me on my Garbology photo-taking practices. The key is walk early in the morning.

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Trick or Treat in the Age of the Self Involved

iStock_000007437531XSmall

Two true halloween anecdotes.

A group of kids converged upon my house as I was coming home this afternoon. “We want candy!” they cried. “Well, good thing because I have lots of it. Let me go inside and get it” I said.

From within the crowd of princesses and ninjas emerged a cute little girl who said, “Trick or treat, I have a nut allergy.” And if that was not crazy enough, one of her little friends had one too.

Now, don’t get me wrong here. I understand the danger of nut allergies so don’t be hounding me with all sorts of comments about being insensitive. But SERIOUSLY, if your kid has a nut allergy, take them on the spooky walk and buy them safe treats, but don’t be having them announce this at each house. And honestly, even the candy companies have warnings that the non-nut candies are made in the same factories. I was allergic to chocolate as a kid and my mom did not have me announce it at every house. She just gave to my brother.

Second story:

Adorable little lady bug comes up to the door by herself. Her parents waited at the street. She couldn’t be more than 4. Not a word from her, she just stood there. I brought out my big pot of all sorts of candy and she just looked in it. “Take anything you like” I said. “I WANT CANDY CORN!” she shouted and then stormed away. Parents were aware of the issue and said they would buy it themselves next year. Said she was asking everyone in the neighborhood for candy corn. Um, sorry folks, hop down to the store and get her some damn candy corn and stop having her make the neighbors feel bad.

What happened to simply running from house to house and jamming your bag full of candy?

Haven’t had enough of me yet? You can also read me at 50-Something Moms Blog. For photo enthusiasts, visit Leaving the zip code, photos from outside the comfort zone.

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Filed under holidays, humor

Halloween (vol. 6) –RIP

Here we are. Halloween at last! As I sit here crafting the last post of this crazy themed week, I see that my daughter has started the Mad-town Wisconsin tradition of 3 nights of spooky celebrations. Her away message reads, “halloween part 1”.

Yes, of course I am jealous. I mean, here I am just finishing up the day’s work at some ongodly hour and there she is… ok let’s not go there. 

This picture was taken in front of a neighbor’s house. I simply love those little hands. This neighborhood goes all out for Halloween. The decorations are wild. Some are kind of kitsch and subtle like this one and others feel the need to put a huge inflatable spider on their roofs. Or worse, those blow up snowglobe monstrosities (no pun intended) on the front lawn.

When my kids were little I used to go the scarecrow, bale of hay, cornstalk, pumpkin, mums route. I liked the traditional look. If I had only known about tampon ghosts, I would surely have added those. Funny, but I don’t remember doing all this Halloween decorating as a kid. We had a pumpkin. if we were lucky we carved it and we called it a day.

My strongest Halloween memory was when some kids stole my pumpkin, ran down the street and smashed it. The lore is that my dad ran after them and made them eat it. Dad, did I make up this memory or did this happen? Hey, go with it, it makes you the hero, why not?

Happy Halloween all! Don’t forget to eat some pizza after you steal your kids candy go trick or treating.

Haven’t had enough of me yet? You can also read me at Mid-Century Modern Moms where they are celebrating their 1 year blogaversary. And at 50-Something Moms Blog… Poor is the New Rich and There is no Hair in Team .

For photo enthusiasts, visit Leaving the zip code, photos from outside the comfort zone.

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Halloween (vol. 5) – Prison Jumpsuit


Ladies and gentleman, here is the third costume featured this week. Again, for those who have missed my week of halloween, scroll down and visit the last few posts. I promise you will not be bored.

So here we are, taking a look at yet another absurd costume choice: The Prison Jumpsuit. I particularly like the styling on this package. Who would have thought of the hands up stance? So creative.

Now there is only one truly disturbing thing about this. Yes, I bet you saw it too. The sizes. Teen. Adult Large. Adult Plus.

Hmmm… Teen is checked here. I am sure, like me, you know a teen or two out there that is probably destined to wear this outfit in the not-so-distant future.

But, honestly, is it wise to encourage this with role playing?

Haven’t had enough of me yet? You can also read me at Mid-Century Modern Moms where they are celebrating their 1 year blogaversary. And at 50-Something Moms Blog… Poor is the New Rich and Sarah Palin Condoms .

For photo enthusiasts, visit Leaving the zip code, photos from outside the comfort zone.

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Halloween (vol. 4) – Restraint Costume

restraint mask and costume

Here we are, back to the ridiculous costumes theme. If you missed the last one you can see it here.

Where do I start with this one? Let’s see, why not go straight to the small print.

Costume includes:

Straight jacket with tie-back (wow, that is some beginning)

Open end sleeves for free hand movement (ok, practical so you can still eat and drink. and um, trick or treat if perhaps you are a pedophile)

Pajama pants (alrighty then, you should certainly be comfortable)

I like that it is ‘one size fits most’. Most what?

Ahhh, now this one simply freaks me out in a Silence of the Lambs sort of way …

muzzle mask with adjustable elastic bands (yeh, right. this would be something a healthy person would want to slap on for the big Halloween bash. Honey, your date is here. He looks kind of cute but I can’t tell because he is wearing a MUZZLE MASK – are you sure you want to go out with this guy?).

But of course my number one favorite part about this costume is that it is an ‘Adult Costume’.

Seriously, anyone out there considering running out to purchase this sucker for their kids? Mom bloggers, help me out here. You in or you out on this baby?

Haven’t had enough of me yet? You can also read me at Mid-Century Modern Moms where they are celebrating their 1 year blogaversary. And at 50-Something Moms Blog… Poor is the New Rich and Sarah Palin Condoms show up here as well.

For photo enthusiasts, visit Leaving the zip code, photos from outside the comfort zone.

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