Tag Archives: friendship

August 10, 2008 · 10:30 pm

Hells Full…


so i’m back?! Wow!

Is it my imagination or have outrageous things been presenting themselves to me since I have started this blog?

Wait, maybe it is because I have finally committed to getting the hell out of the basement more often. Who knew there was such a wild world out there all this time? I would have gotten out a lot earlier.

Seriously, aside from the basement, I think it has a lot to do with leaving the zip code. Not just this zip code in particular, but any zip code. We tend to get stuck in the rut of what we know. The culture to which we subscribe. The same scenery passes us by like a tape loop of the comfort zone. But the comfort zone can get boring, no? Sometimes you need to shake things up a bit to feel like you are alive.

Don’t get me wrong, I do not shun the zip code by any means – well, ok, sometimes I do but that is just when I have growing pains and get bored. (I had to say that because I know all of you who I complain about the zip code to are reading this and will call me on it). The community in which I live has carried me through many a hard time and the friendships I have made here are ones that a cherish deeply. For that I am eternally grateful. But change is good and spreading your wings to see how others spend their time is a good thing.

I bet you are wondering were ‘in hell’ I came across this beauty. Saturday was one of those days when the stars were aligned. A perfect day with great friends, we decided to go to a beach we do not frequent and as luck would have it this place had it all: sun, surf, sand, A FULL BAR, a great live band late in the day, and a parking lot full of car enthusiasts with some of the coolest cars I have every seen. (Talk about passion, these people are really into it).

Some things you can not plan.

As one of the famous First Thursdays said not long ago, “I would rather have fun in hell, than be bored in heaven.”

Hey wait, Maddee, is this your car?!

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June 20, 2008 · 9:56 pm

Time to cry

I know this blog is about laughter, but sometimes we have no choice but to cry.

Yesterday a dear friend and neighbor lost her life in a tragic traffic accident. She was only 58 years old. This post is a tribute to woman who personified the word family.

Every so often in our lives we come across people who lead by example. We are fortunate enough to live across the street from such a family for the past 20 years. They have 4 grown children, all of whom moved back to the area. A magical grandchild who I have joked about being the third grandparent to. And a circle of friends so wide and deep it is illustrated by the never-ending stream of cars that have lined our street since the hours after the accident.

This morning I heard a 12-year-old boy and a grown man ask the same thing. “How can you be here one minute and gone the next?”. Of course, there is no explanation that could satisfy either. This is the unfathomable.

We all leave behind a legacy of sorts. I would like to think of hers as our neighborhood guide to motherhood. She taught us all how to be parents. My husband joked with her and asked what she fed those kids to keep them coming back. She knew how to live life to its fullest and spread love through her work as a teacher and the way she presided over her beautiful family. A tireless woman who always had a way of making everyone feel special. A friend said that their family was like 6 degrees of separation in our community. Probably less in my estimation.

The last time I saw her was the day before she died. It was late in the day and she, her husband, daughter and grandson were walking down the street. I looked in my rear view mirror as I passed and waved, and thought to myself how lucky they are to have raised such a beautiful family and be so young to enjoy the next generation. Her daughter is pregnant with her second child… a girl.

A bittersweet cycle of life.

To you, my friend. I can only hope that wherever you are, you are able to see the impact you made on this world.

Some days time loses out over crying.

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June 16, 2008 · 10:00 pm

First Thursday

If you live in my house, or that of 6 other outrageous women in my zip code, the first Thursday of the month means a night out with ‘the girls’. I will use that term only in the cliché of ‘girl’s night out’, for the seven of us are certainly w-o-m-e-n. In all its positive (and not so positive) connotations. Our husbands may like to spell that b-i-t-c-h. (or more affectionately… bee-otch).

It is hard to describe this group and do it any justice. Were we born out of the need to be heard and not judged? Perhaps. I do know that this is a table where I can fool absolutely NOBODY. And if I try to, I am called on it… big time!

Our mission, if there was to be one, is to BE THERE, no matter what. And to laugh, laugh, laugh.

We started in the most haphazard of ways. We met riding the train, through carpools, as neighbors or running partners. There was no rhyme or reason to who was in… we just happened. We measure the time we have been together by the age of the youngest of our collective 18 children who was born 2 weeks before we started. (12 years ago!) We have shared each other’s joys and heartbreaks ever since. There have been many of both, which makes us all realize how important it is to have your girls.

Our beginning was the essence of the title of this blog, we all could cry but we just had no time. Funny…but not. We were all working mothers with children ranging in age from 0-10 when we began. We come from all fields: medicine, finance, design, merchandising, real estate and entertainment. We are business owners, consultants, full time employees… you name it. Some have stopped working (for pay), some have scaled back and others have ramped up. We are the embodiment of how to juggle at any cost. And we were all beginning to realize that ‘the cost’ was ourselves.

Now that the kids are older life is easier on a maintenance level, but way harder on a life issues one.

There is no table I have ever sat at that is more entertaining. The following is the list of topics discussed at one dinner:

hillary vs. obama, SAT vs. ACT, big 10 vs. private universities, medical neutering of men in power (sorry guys, but this COULD keep you focused), career paths, time off, homeopathic vs. western medicine, botox, tennis, pilates and yoga, 10 lbs. on your ass doing wonders for your face at ‘a certain age‘, social media ruining the focus of our kids or are they just learning in a new way, multi-tasking, facebook, study habits, glass ceilings,  spreadsheets, iphones, the choices of our kids, the ailments of our parents, south beach, vegas, perez hilton, dave matthews (how did those two get in the same conversation?), the right to choose… EVERYTHING in our lives, the size of our asses and our egos, face creams, bad dreams, edging towards, turning and passing 50… and everything in between. (And that is just the list I dare to publish).

Thank you my dear sweet First Thursdays, for keeping me laughing, and yes crying too! You make the good times more joyous and bad ones easier to endure.

I love you all. (admit it, you are tearing up a bit ; )

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