Tag Archives: mania

Insomnomaniac

What do you do when you can’t sleep? When I can’t, I make up words and submit them to Urban Dictionary. Last month I tried to get Turkaphobia approved, but they denied it. My definition was ‘fear of cooking the Thanksgiving turkey’, which I happily overcame. I am guessing it had something to do with not being politically correct.

No not towards turkeys, but towards the country.

I am happy to report that this month’s submission – insomnomaniac – has been approved. I am not so happy to report that there is a typo in the sentence that I used in the example where ‘an’ is featured as ‘and’.

For those who can not read the picture above the definition is:

One who can’t sleep and becomes obsessed with late night activities.

Define obsessed.

5 Comments

Filed under absurdities, urban dictionary

Menopause, Mercury in Retrograde and other Mania

Mercury1I can’t sleep. All forms of technology are going wacky. Appliances are on the blink. I feel like I am in groundhogs day. I am hot. I am cold. I am bloated. I am starving. I can’t complete a task, let alone multi-task. The sun is in my eyes. There is a bump in the bowling alley. The dog ate my homework.

I am in a funk (and I am NEVER in a funk!)

Ok, you get the point. Things are just a little amiss these days. I could have written it off to turning 50, menopause (because everything gets blamed on that) or simply cyclical mania which I suppose I can be accused of being prone to. Hell, I could even blame it all on being the Magnet For The Absurd.

But thankfully both Yogamom (2nd shout out to you, babe) and my sister-in-law have pointed out that Mercury is in Retrograde from September 7th till October 18th and that crazy devil, that cosmic trickster, can cause all types of problems. And what, you ask, does this actually mean? Read this from astrology.com:

A planet is described as retrograde when it appears to be moving backwards through the zodiac. According to modern science, this traditional concept arises in the illusory planetary motion created by the orbital rotation of the earth with relation to other planets in our solar system. Planets are never actually retrograde or stationary, they just seem that way due to this cosmic shadow-play. Click here for more on the science of retrograde planetary motion.

Huh?

Whatevs. My takeaway on this is simply things will be back to normal on October 18th.

Define normal!

Haven’t had enough of me yet? You can also read me at 50-Something Moms Blog. For photo enthusiasts, visit Leaving the zip code, photos from outside the comfort zone.

add to del.icio.usAdd to Blinkslistadd to furlDigg itadd to ma.gnoliaStumble It!add to simpyseed the vineTailRankpost to facebook

9 Comments

Filed under absurdities, humor