Tag Archives: hope

Time to Cry Tuesday – #silverribbons

Today I would like to bring to you a post from a woman who I consider to be one of the funniest people in the blogosphere. I have followed her forever and her outrageous writing is both entertaining and so relatable. Jenny Lawson, The Bloggess (damn, I have always been jealous of that name), took a step last night towards bringing attention to an issue very close to my heart and put herself out there to help lift the stigma.

Depression. Yeh, even the funny girl can suffer. Till now, it has been privately. But now she is taking it to the internet and maybe, just maybe, this campaign will show us how many of us are touched by this illness. If not ourselves, but people we love. And they are not alone.

Mental illness. Even reading those words causes some to shudder and run for cover. No matter how evolved we think we have become as a society, no matter how many anti-depressants and anti-anxieties are doled out like candy. No matter how many commercials – some touching, some ridiculous (a certain wind up doll comes to mind), it never ceases to amaze me how people will still speak in hushed tones about depression as if it were the plague. As if the mere mention of the word will open you up for susceptibility.

When you suffer from a physical illness, you are considered brave. When you fight a mental illness many consider you weak.

Wrong… you are the strongest, bravest fighter of them all.

Here is an excerpt from her post. You can read the whole thing here. Twitter has exploded with the hashtag #silverribbons. This is proof that so many fight this fight alone. Maybe Jenny can change that. And we can help her.

I self-harm.  I don’t do it all the time and it’s not enough to put me into an institution or threaten my well-being, but it’s enough to make it frightening to live in my body sometimes.  I’m far from suicidal.  I do it to self-sooth, because the physical pain distracts me from the mental pain.  It’s one of those things that’s impossible to explain to people who don’t understand impulse control disorder.  Honestly, I find it hard to understand it to myself and I’m working my ass off to fix it now before my daughter is old enough to see the things I don’t want her to see.  It is one of the hardest things I have ever done.

I am safe.  My disorder is fairly mild and is becoming more controlled.  I’m in therapy and I’m not in danger.  I avoid triggers and I’ve found therapies and drugs that are helping.  I’m getting better.  But I sort of feel like I can’t completely heal from this without being honest about it.  So here it is.  Judge me or not, I am the same person I was before.  And so are you.  And chances are that many of your friends, family and coworkers are dealing with things like this.  Things that are killing them a little inside.  Things that kill people who don’t get help.  Silent, bloody battles that end with secret victors who can’t celebrate without shame.  I hope that this post changes this somehow.  I hope that you feel safe enough to be honest about the things you are the most ashamed of.  I hope you have someone there telling you “It’s okay.  You’re still the same person to me.”

I hope  one day I see a sea of people all wearing silver ribbons as a sign that they understand the secret battle and that they celebrate the victories made each day as we individually pull ourselves up out of our foxholes to see our scars heal, and to remember what the sun looks like.

I hope one day to be better and I’m pretty sure I will be.  I hope one day I live in a world where the personal fight for mental stability is viewed with pride and public cheers instead of shame.  I hope it for you too.

But until then, it starts slowly.

To Jenny… the bravest one of all. May your dream come true, and may we all help you realize them.


Filed under mental illness, Time to Cry Tuesdays

9/11: From Horror Comes Hope

Fred R. Conrad/The New York Times

This year instead of looking back on the horror that was, let’s look forward to the thriving neighborhood that will be. Don’t read that wrong. I am a firm believer in never forgetting. This is a solemn day that deserves respect and reverence. But I believe there is always a place for hope.

In case you missed this NYT article, here are the plans for what will be a completely new piece of New York. One that will both remember what we have lost and give hope for what we will gain.

In this time of insanity surrounding the protest of the building of religious institutions and the burning of sacred texts, is it not time for us to be the America we have worked so desperately to defend and preserve?

Enough hatred.

Please feel free to remember anyone you have lost or hope you may have for the future, but do not feel free to preach hatred in these comments.


Filed under communities, current events, New York, New York City, politics, religion

Time to Cry Tuesday – Sadness and Hope

Today marks a bittersweet Time to Cry Tuesday installment. The excitement and sentiment of hope surrounding the inauguration is tempered with sadness for our family. Must be some bizarre alignment of the stars that I should be writing of loss for a second Tuesday in a row.

This past week we lost a beloved family member. She was a woman who always looked you in the eye when you spoke. Hell, even when you were on the phone. Her infectious laugh and high spirit, even in the face of hardship, left us in awe of how she navigated a less than perfect life.

I believe that each person leaves a mark on this earth when they leave. Along with the great void that remains in her absence resides the essence of her special brand of optimism. Her wild sense of humor and ability to draw people together is carried on through the grown son she leaves behind. His home is filled with love, many friends and lots of children! They will carry on her memory with stories of the impact she made on their lives. And they can move forward with the comfort of knowing they were the light of her life.

I am pretty sure that wherever she is, they read blogs. And if she happens to read this I am sure she would say something to the effect of, ‘Who the F was she talking about?’ 

Once a jokester, always a jokester.

Haven’t had enough of me yet? You can also read me at Mid-Century Modern Moms and at 50-Something Moms Blog.

For photo enthusiasts, visit Leaving the zip code, photos from outside the comfort zone.

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Filed under family, relationships, Time to Cry Tuesdays

Time to Cry Tuesday – Let the Daughters Speak Out

I first saw this video on PunditMom, a fellow blogger at 50-Something Moms blog. (I simply love her daily commentary).

Sorry email subscribers, you probably won’t be able to view this video without going online to the blog, but I urge you to do so. This is very powerful.

Hey, I love a good Sarah Palin Condom or an SNL sketch just like the rest of them, but my fear is that we have all gotten so caught up with Joe the Plumber, hockey moms, mavericks and you betcha’s that we are mired in the satire and don’t stop to really consider the ramifications. I had a friend say the other day that now is not the time to be a one-issue voter. That our country is in such turmoil we need to look outside our personal pet issues and vote for what is best for this country. Thankfully for me, both of those ideas go hand in hand.

If you have a daughter, this one will give you chills. If you are a women, it will make you feel proud of the generation that is speaking out in this piece. Hey, and if you are a (straight) guy, there is a good chance you can ‘get you some’ if you send this to your significant other. (sorry, even Time to Cry Tuesday needs a little levity).

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Filed under current events, family, parenting, politics, women