Pardon me for being an infant… Fart Pads

fart-pads

I am so sorry. I could not resist this one. Just in case you were worried from yesterday’s post that I really did lose my sense of humor, this should dispel that myth.

I will dedicate this post to my brother who is more of an infant than I am, if you can imagine that.

This picture is priceless. I would have loved to have been the art director on this project. Imagine talking to the illustrator, ” You know, make it look like a cross between a mini pad and a spoon.”

So, let me tell you about this product. It is called Flat-D. That would be short for Flatulence Deodorizer. I kid you not. You must read the About the Inventor page on the website.

Because I could never do justice quite the way they do themselves, here is a little excerpt from their website:

Hey, isn’t it time to stop the release of unpleasant pungent gas odors? Our exclusive doctor recommended Premium pad instantly clears and sanitizes the air when gas is expelled… Without the tell-tale lingering odor that can instantly put you in a very awkward situation. 

Oh, you mean like that smell just before someone says, “Ew, who farted”? I wonder if it also acts as a silencer.

There is more:

Is embarrassing gas a concern for YOU?
Discreetly neutralize it fast with our Flatulence Deodorizer Premium Pad 
• A doctor recommended way to neutralize gas odor
• Washable and reusable
• Perfect for IBS sufferers, gastric bypass surgery individuals, or anyone with excess gas

Washable and reusable?!!! “Honey do you mind rinsing out my fart pads tonight, I have a big meeting tomorrow.”

Anyone with excess gas? Um, is that not EVERYONE.

Oh wait, except my mom, there is no way she farts.

Haven’t had enough of me yet? You can also read me at 50-Something Moms Blog.

For photo enthusiasts, visit Leaving the zip code, photos from outside the comfort zone.

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7 Comments

Filed under absurdities, humor, products

7 responses to “Pardon me for being an infant… Fart Pads

  1. Laurie

    amy,
    What a way to start the day! You are too funny. the more i read the more i think you could moonlight as a stand up. ?
    Happy spring…enjoy the “fresh” air 🙂

  2. Andrea

    Oh my gosh. Is this Amy as in RIT Amy of Michael’s friend Amy? This is hysterical and I am cracking up. Hi Amy – it is Fats’s littlest sister. Laurie sent this to me. : )

  3. jen

    Really? Can I get a couple dozen boxes? ‘Cause I have two little boys and it’s just gonna get rank around here as they get older! LOL

  4. jflorin

    When I was pregnant, this would have been a lot more discreet than having the fan in my office.

    Oh well, 17 years to late.

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