Tag Archives: mail order

All That Glitters

ship-your-enemies-glitterSomeone getting on your last nerve? Ex driving you crazy? Not all that comfortable with confrontation?

Here’s your solution. ShipYourEnemiesGlitter.com. Glitter as a service.

What a great idea. Relatively harmless, it is perfect for someone who has annoyed you to no end. And of course those who want to fight like fairies. Or for those of you out there who get furious but no one really knows (and you know who you are).

Ten bucks, no muss no fuss… on your end. For the enemy… it is the gift that keeps on giving. Or as the site refers to it, passing along ‘the craft herpes’.

Why did I not think of this? As the craft household when the kids were little, glitter was consider a condiment. You can never get rid of that stuff.

I am so not about retaliation, I would rather move on than let people get the best of me. But, believe me, in the heat of the moment I can rant like no other. Perhaps this is a nice alternative to raising the old blood pressure.

The site is quite something. You can be sure the people who came up with this have been dissed in their day – lots of cursing a  and calling people names just to fuel the fire. Don’t miss the reviews page, because it is good to know that snorting glitter will make your nose bleed.

I will file this under the same genius as the selling of 30,000 boxes of bullshit.

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Filed under absurdities, marketing, products

WTD – What the duck?

This is one of those stories you can not possibly make up. And proof that no matter how old your kid is, it is guaranteed that he/she will continue to do things to throw you off guard and cause havoc in your life.

Picture this. Two college student cousins on a family vacation on the Cape. One night they start getting into a conversation about what would be a cool pet to have. They remember a Friends episode with a pet duck. One thing leads to another, google is involved and the next thing you know they have ordered 6 ducklings online.

Fast forward  a week and some duck food arrives at my girfriend’s house. ‘What is this about’?, she asks her 20-year-old son. Um, we ordered some ducks as pets. ‘Yeh, right’, she thinks and goes about her business.

Until a few days later when she gets a call from her son:

Son: Hi

Mother: Hi

Son: Ummmm, hi.

Mother: What?

Son: are you home?

Mother: of course I am not home, you know I am at work and I am crazy busy. What can I do for you?

Son: Wellllll… the ducks are going to arrive to day.

Mother: that is unfortunate because I am at work and so are you so those are going to be some fried ducks when we get home.

They worked it out, had someone come over and let the ducks in and when they got home the son created an environment for them in the garage with a car roof carrier and a cooler, rigged with some netting to keep the raccoons out.

So my friend asks herself, “What the duck? I mean are you ducking kidding me?!!

Haven’t had enough of me yet? You can also read me at 50-Something Moms Blog. For photo enthusiasts, visit Leaving the zip code, photos from outside the comfort zone.

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Filed under absurdities, pets, photography