Olympic Malfunctioning Caldron and Other Fails

I waited all week for this. I LOVE the opening ceremonies of the Olympics. I know it is a little corny but I can’t help it. And I have to say I was greatly disappointed. The last winter olympics opening ceremony in Beijing was so spectacular, this simply fell flat. Even the logo was so much cooler last time.

There was, however, one tremendous highlight for our family. The Canadian National Anthem was sung by a 16-year-old super talent named Nikki Yanofsky. And why do we care? Because not only is Nikki an alum of my kids’ camp, she was my daughter’s camper. Check out her official Olympic song here. It hit #1 on Canada’s itunes. Chills from this one. You go Nikki, we are very proud!

Back to the opening ceremonies. Here are my top 5 fails:

5. First half hour… painfully boring. I kept looking for the Cirque style bungee jumpers and fell short with beads and head dresses.

4. What was the criteria for being one of the dancers in the white outfits, did you just have to have legs?

3. Opera singer… OMG who thought it would be a good idea to do that after 11PM?

2. The speeches: 2 old guys droning on for 15 minutes after 11:30? Bilingually. Seriously!

And the number 1 fail of the ceremonies, the one we are sure that someone was fired for, the one that brought about all sorts of cursing behind the scenes (in French AND English) would be…

1. The caldron malfunction!

Although they were fortunate enough not to have a nipple show during this sucker, we did notice Wayne Gretsky getting awfully antsy waiting for those poles to rise.

All in all, this was a sleeper. Although we were quite fond of the suspended thing that had a Georgia O’keefe Tri-vaginal quality about it. I believe Larry knick-named it The Trigina. (another Urban Dictionary entry for sure).

Haven’t had enough of me yet? You can also read me at 50-Something Moms Blog. For photo enthusiasts, visit Leaving the zip code, photos from outside the comfort zone.

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5 Comments

Filed under camp, current events, family, games, humor, sports

5 responses to “Olympic Malfunctioning Caldron and Other Fails

  1. Liz

    Congrats to your camper. I was underwhelmed by it, so much so, that bed seemed like a better option. Either that or Jersey Shore!

  2. Ellen

    My favorite part was the whales moving through the floor and the giant bear…otherwise, snorzeville! The music was a constant drone!

  3. judy

    i thought i was the only one who loved all things olympics including the opening ceremony….except for this one. but i DID stay up to watch it …..and to get made fun of…..by the way–you really should have been an ob-gyn. you have a vagina fixation……

  4. Rebecca

    As a Canuck from Northern Ontario, I thought the Canadian anthem was terrible. I hate it when singers show-off during an anthem. It’s not her song, it’s OUR song, don’t ruin it. No offence to the singer – it’s just inconsiderate to the nation. (The rythem was WAY off)

    I felt so bad for the women who didn’t get to light a torch, malfunctions suck. But Vancouver is plauged with corruption and crime, and a lack of snow (it never snows there, why have the winter olympics?)

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