Cheerleaders are the New Terrorists

cheerleaders

I have known a rabid cheerleader or two in my day (you know who you are, I am sure I don’t have to single you out), so these news stories should not come as a shock to me. For some reason they have struck a nerve.

First, there is the story of Caitlin Davis who was thrown off the New England Patriots cheerleading squad after Deadspin uncovered that she had posted pictures on her Facebook page of herself drawing penises and swastikas on her passed out friend. Niiiiiice. Love the Facebook piece. Has no one gotten the fact that this is stupid yet? This is like the salvia smoking YouTube idiots.

Best part? In an interview she told the Sun Chronicle one of the motivating factors to becoming a Pats cheerleader was the thrill of doing community appearances:

“That’s what I did with my church youth group.” 

Um, right honey, we are all buying the cute little church group girl thing now!

Next Story, an El Paso, Texas cheerleading squad from Chapin Sapphire High baked up a lovely batch of cupcakes and brownies laced with rat poison and bleach as a gift for their rival schools’ cheerleaders.

Yum. And the thinking was what? If the other girls puked up the chocolate frosting the bleach would lift the stain out? How considerate.

Apparently these rival teams are known for ‘little pranks’ before games. Correct me if I am wrong here, but since when was POISONING a ‘little prank’.

Here is the scary part. The punishment for these psycho pom pom bee-otches was a 3 day suspension.

To quote FanIQ “Well that seems fair. If I poisoned someone’s food I’d get 15 to life for attempted murder while these girls get three days off of school. Just more proof that cheerleaders can get away with anything, well, as long as it doesn’t involve drawing swastikas on anyone’s face. But trying to kill someone else, that’s totally cool.”

The moral of this story? You never know what those cheerleaders are packin’ in their pom poms.

 

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5 Comments

Filed under absurdities, current events, lawsuits, Uncategorized

5 responses to “Cheerleaders are the New Terrorists

  1. Right on. The whole “institution” of cheer-leading is almost as ridiculous as paying athletes more money (and adulation) than brain surgeons and scientific researchers in our country. It all makes me sad … And who doesn’t remember the cruelty of these airheads in high school?

  2. Amy. Did ya ever notice that band geeks (myself included) never make it to the papers? Nah, we just got stoned and went to marching band camp and competitions. Good clean fun! ;-p

  3. jflorin

    I couldn’t agree more with the comment about how ridiculous iit is paying athletes more than brain surgeons. It is pretty frightening.

    However, I’m not sure I’m happy about the comment about the cruelty of the airheads in high school. I was a cheerleader in high school, (captain I’m might add) and I don’t think I was ever cruel, nor was I an airhead. I actually hung up the pom poms at some point in life and went on to working very hard and being successful.

    I think we need to focus a bit more on tolerance. Live and let live ladies. For those of you who never consider being a cheerleader, in high school, more power to you. And for those of you that did, you can stop apologizing.

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