Time to Cry Tuesday – It’s Only a Number


“Not bad for 99”, said the old woman in front of me at the supermarket as she gestured towards her husband counting out his change.

“99?!” I said, how old are you?” She told me that she was 95, he would be 100 in November and they would be married 76 years that same month. All I could think was that either Gary or I will surely run one or the other over with the car before then I hope to have such a long, happy marriage. Seventy-six years of marriage, YIKES!

Honestly, these people looked like they were in their early 80s. “He does all the cooking now. I did it the first half of our lives but he finds it relaxing and I just do the wash and the ironing now. Maybe a little dusting now and then.”

Now, here is a little something you do not know about me. It is more than a coincidence as it has been happening my whole adult life. At times when I am most stressed or aggravated, perhaps suffering from some good old-fashioned self pity, I get a sign. No seriously, I do. It is not that I am all that religious, moderately I would say, but I am spiritual. And I do pay attention to the signs.

So here is the thing. I could be having a rotten day, things can be going all sorts of wrong and then I will see a blind man get on a subway. Or someone with two canes walking down the street. All kinds of disabilities show up in my line of vision just as I am feeling good and sorry for myself.

And that is when I look up and say, “OK, I get it.”

So back to my little old couple, who by the way were driving which did concern me, but I digress. I was in the supermarket off schedule. I was racing from a soccer game in the rain to a Saturday night affair with an hour to shower, hair and make up. Oh and of course Spanx which take up 15 minutes of that hour. If you have ever put on Spanx you know what I mean. I realized that I did not have dinner for the drenched and famished soccer player so I stopped off to pick something up.

I was driving and thinking about turning 50. Not one to usually care about the numbers, this year was no exception. Until just then. And I thought, hell, 50 is old. I mean not out of it, life is over, drama queen, where has my youth gone kind of old. Just old. Or maybe old(ish).

And then there they were. My sign. The fact was these people were twice my age. And ironing for G-d sake! Seriously, get over yourself, kid!

To add to the attitude adjustment there were the 2 trips to the DMV today (a story for another time), that made me realize that in that context I was a totally young, skinny, babe.

So in celebration of turning 50 I will reaffirm my favorite thought:

There is no reality. Only perception.

Here’s to perception!

Haven’t had enough of me yet? You can also read me at 50-Something Moms Blog. For photo enthusiasts, visit Leaving the zip code, photos from outside the comfort zone.

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Filed under Time to Cry Tuesdays

10 responses to “Time to Cry Tuesday – It’s Only a Number

  1. Gail

    Happy Birthday! You set the bar high Amy! Have a great day!

  2. Happy birthday. I hope your reality and perception are wonderful.

  3. Perception is only 50-50. What the heck does that mean anyhow? HAPPY BIRTHDAY BBFF Love you.


  4. laurie

    Happy Birthday to my favorite blogger and friend. May you blog until you are in your 90’s! XO

  5. Ivy Mindlin

    Happy Birthday. As we’ve always said, its not only about perception but our tolerance “any any given moment.”

    Who cares. Have a happy happy birthday. Enjoy the day…you deserve it.

  6. Keith

    You’re halfway there. Happy Birthday, little Sistetta!

  7. Wow, talk about Power Couples!
    50 years young, Happy Birthday!

  8. Dr Jimmy

    Happy Birthday to our favorite Magnet from one of your Absurditiies! There’s no turning back now!!

  9. Gina Staffa


  10. Alexandra

    Me, too! I’ve always told my husband that right after I have a “poor me” thought, something walks by to illuminate things for me.

    At Disney, when I was feeling sorry for myself b/c our 3 boys have food allergies, and whinewhine we can’t eat anything here, a little boy with a red tipped cane walks by, holding on to his accepting SMILING mother’s arm.

    Thank you, very much, God: you don’t have to hit me in the head with a 2×4..I get it loud and clear.

    Enough with the self pity.

    Again, at our youngest son’s soccer game, I was feeling all sad andt sorry for myself b/c my husband forgot our anniversary–wahwah what a bad man. Then, a woman I knew 10 yrs ago, walks over, and reintroduces herself and asks if she can just sit and talk for a few minutes. Within seconds, she discloses with sobbing and tears, that her husband left 2 wks ago (mind you, we both had our 7 yr old boys at this game.) OK, that settlles that: what is a forgotten anniversary, anyway. He’s got a lot on his mind, he still comes home to us every night.

    What is this phenomena? I have it happen at the most important times,too.

    Great post…Thank you.

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